On communicating

Many threads on ECF are accused of being cliques. The definition of a clique according to wikipedia is

In the social sciences, the word "clique" is used to describe a group of 2 to 12 (averaging 5 or 6) “persons who interact with each other more regularly and intensely than others in the same setting.”[1] Cliques are distinguished from "crowds" in that their members interact with one another (e.g., hang out together, go shopping, LAN parties). Crowds, on the other hand, are defined reputationally. Although the word 'clique' or 'cliquey' is often used in day-to-day conversation to describe relational aggression or snarky, gossipy behavior of groups of socially dominant teenage girls ('queen bees') this is not scientifically accurate. Interacting with cliques is part of normative social development regardless of gender, ethnicity, or “popularity.” Although cliques are most commonly studied during adolescence and middle childhood, they exist in all age groups.

When reading this definition the word ADOLESCENT jumped out at me. By virtue of the fact that vapers are of smoking age which can range from 18-21 in different states, we old timers must remember that many of our members are just that...........adolescents. Our ECF community has a wide spread demographic. One could be among a group of teens,middle aged mommas, fathers, retiree's, mentally ill, addicts and the disabled. We are a microcosm of America all united by a single solitary interest. We all want to vaporize our nicotine or use alternatives to smoking. Sometimes this commonality is lost in the mix of personalities, economic situation, and most importantly the written word as a single means of communication. This single form leaves much out of the communication. There is no body language, facial expression (albeit the smilies and emoticons do assist a bit) there is no other way to "get" what is being said except the written word and that can be a serious communication wall. Think of the sentence "What are you doing?" Now put emphasis on each word and repeat the sentence with the emphasis on each separate word. Many many things can be read into that small sentence. I try to be cognizant of the fact that we are not really communicating.... we are merely typing and sending words into cyberspace in hopes that our intent is received as intended.
I try to type once read three times and press post but sometimes in excitement the post comes before the read and havoc ensues. I hope anyone that cares enough to read this will accept my apologies if I have ever offended or ignored (THE WORST IMHO) a post. I assure you, I would never do so with bad intent. I am a person trying to be kind and a little silly. Please accept my apologies if I ever have done something to you that made you feel less than the awesome person God meant you to be. By the same token, I forgive those of you who have ignored me or posted over me. I know you are not in a clique.............you are just good friends, right? I sometimes feel like the high school gym class all over again...........getting picked last. Boy, I am darn glad I don't have to live that again............or do I?:blink: I choose not to. Oh BTW, Goodnight Bonnie.

Comments

Right on bonneigirl! Very well said...an boy do I know what its like to get picked last! :)
 

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