Next year, there will be a change. Next year the rota will work on a credits system. If you can't do your cleaning one week and someone else does it for you, you owe them a week of cleaning. Next year, one person will be responsible for buying any cleaning stuff for an entire month. There will be a list, they will buy what is required on that list. That way, it isn't always the same person. We will also all put in £10 at the start of the month for cleaning stuff and any change will be returned, rather than faffing around with 'ooh you owe me £2.67 and you owe me £1.79'.
Again, what does that have to do with vaping? A LOT! I am slightly more calm for having ranted here. My heart is no longer pounding. My fists are less clenched. My stomach less clenched. My tongue less likely to yell obscenities. But only just.
Somehow, I have managed to stick to 8mg. Don't get me wrong, the 24mg in my magical potion box was looking tempting but I stuck it out.
It's a sad day when the one room you can call your own feels like a prison cell. I'm literally locked in here, desperate for a drink and not wanting to go downstairs. They don't knock on my door if they can help it so I'm somewhat 'safe' in here. Aside from Martyr, they don't speak to me anyway.
vaping has, in many ways, saved the day living here as I can, to the most part, avoid them. Short of nipping to the bathroom or for the occasional drink, I don't have to see them - even if I can hear them! If I still smoked, I'd have to go outside every five minutes! In a strange paradox I wonder if things weren't so stressful if I'd have stayed on the bandwagon as successfully as I have? They say there's never a good time to quit smoking but perhaps not feeling able to leave my room has helped. Perhaps one day I'll be mentally thanking them for saving my life! Obviously, I wont be sending them a facebook message as they deleted me back in January when I changed my privacy settings.
Ajhan Brahm, one of my favourite speakers (look him up on Youtube) says one of the ways of dealing with difficult people is to pity them. Martyr can't change a lightbulb (23, trainee teacher, two degrees and a driving license) so how on earth will she cope when she lives alone? Beelzebub will inevitably catch some horrendous stomach complaint from the total lack of cleanliness and lose the contents of her stomach/bowels and have to clean it all up herself. Little Himmler will find herself without her backbone of support from Beelzebub and be obviously the feeble little wretch I see. I, on the other hand, am pig-headed and as stubborn as a mule. I have heels and I know how to dig them in. Sometimes, its a good quality... sometimes its a weakness. Ajhan Brahm also says that sometimes you have to let a fight be lost in the interests of harmony. Ajhan Brahm lives in a monastery where everyone does what's expected of them to the very best of their ability. Perhaps I should consider the chicken/duck metaphor of strategically losing a fight a little more deeply... or perhaps I should just remember that there's only 6 weeks until Beelzebub and Martyr move out and I'm left with only the feeble little wretch that is Little Himmler!
Ajhan Brahm also says that the mosquitos used to worry him when he was a young monk, trying to meditate. Eventually, he learned to called them 'Ajhan mosquitos' or 'teacher mosquitos' as they helped him learn tollerance. Actually, he doesn't always like the word tollerance... anyway, there's a lot to be learned from this experience:
1) Thanks to their stress, I've been able to stay on my PV!
2) I know exactly what will work in this house for next year's 'rules'
3) I know that no matter how angry I get, I can avoid bludgeoning them to death and can take it out on the weeds in the garden!
4) Harbouring negative thoughts towards them is a bad thing and I should learn to let go...that's something to work on!
Ahhh, Ajhan Brahm always makes me calm! He's a very clever man, full of very clever ideas! I shall begin re-reading his book again immediately.
OK...rant over... I'm sorry to those of you who bothered to suffer reading this God-awful emo-esque moan and rant! But I feel better...perhaps now I should carry on reading for my class tomorrow...x
Again, what does that have to do with vaping? A LOT! I am slightly more calm for having ranted here. My heart is no longer pounding. My fists are less clenched. My stomach less clenched. My tongue less likely to yell obscenities. But only just.
Somehow, I have managed to stick to 8mg. Don't get me wrong, the 24mg in my magical potion box was looking tempting but I stuck it out.
It's a sad day when the one room you can call your own feels like a prison cell. I'm literally locked in here, desperate for a drink and not wanting to go downstairs. They don't knock on my door if they can help it so I'm somewhat 'safe' in here. Aside from Martyr, they don't speak to me anyway.
vaping has, in many ways, saved the day living here as I can, to the most part, avoid them. Short of nipping to the bathroom or for the occasional drink, I don't have to see them - even if I can hear them! If I still smoked, I'd have to go outside every five minutes! In a strange paradox I wonder if things weren't so stressful if I'd have stayed on the bandwagon as successfully as I have? They say there's never a good time to quit smoking but perhaps not feeling able to leave my room has helped. Perhaps one day I'll be mentally thanking them for saving my life! Obviously, I wont be sending them a facebook message as they deleted me back in January when I changed my privacy settings.
Ajhan Brahm, one of my favourite speakers (look him up on Youtube) says one of the ways of dealing with difficult people is to pity them. Martyr can't change a lightbulb (23, trainee teacher, two degrees and a driving license) so how on earth will she cope when she lives alone? Beelzebub will inevitably catch some horrendous stomach complaint from the total lack of cleanliness and lose the contents of her stomach/bowels and have to clean it all up herself. Little Himmler will find herself without her backbone of support from Beelzebub and be obviously the feeble little wretch I see. I, on the other hand, am pig-headed and as stubborn as a mule. I have heels and I know how to dig them in. Sometimes, its a good quality... sometimes its a weakness. Ajhan Brahm also says that sometimes you have to let a fight be lost in the interests of harmony. Ajhan Brahm lives in a monastery where everyone does what's expected of them to the very best of their ability. Perhaps I should consider the chicken/duck metaphor of strategically losing a fight a little more deeply... or perhaps I should just remember that there's only 6 weeks until Beelzebub and Martyr move out and I'm left with only the feeble little wretch that is Little Himmler!
Ajhan Brahm also says that the mosquitos used to worry him when he was a young monk, trying to meditate. Eventually, he learned to called them 'Ajhan mosquitos' or 'teacher mosquitos' as they helped him learn tollerance. Actually, he doesn't always like the word tollerance... anyway, there's a lot to be learned from this experience:
1) Thanks to their stress, I've been able to stay on my PV!
2) I know exactly what will work in this house for next year's 'rules'
3) I know that no matter how angry I get, I can avoid bludgeoning them to death and can take it out on the weeds in the garden!
4) Harbouring negative thoughts towards them is a bad thing and I should learn to let go...that's something to work on!
Ahhh, Ajhan Brahm always makes me calm! He's a very clever man, full of very clever ideas! I shall begin re-reading his book again immediately.
OK...rant over... I'm sorry to those of you who bothered to suffer reading this God-awful emo-esque moan and rant! But I feel better...perhaps now I should carry on reading for my class tomorrow...x
