samysam1313,
I understand
exactly what you're saying. I've been there....about 3 weeks ago. Let me just say that I think you're going to be sooooo pleasantly surprised! For one thing, right now just lighting up a cigarette
'hurts' so bad when your lungs have been damaged already. And you say to yourself,
'I must be out of my mind...but I've got to do this anyway and I don't really know why!' And you continue to do it....and don't really know why. So did I.
And then a miracle happens, you discover that you can actually
inhale a
PV's vapor without thinking this time you might just die from it. And it doesn't hurt. And it smells and tastes fresh. And hours pass and you can't believe this is happening, that you don't even
desire a cigarette any more! Instead, the very thought repulses you. As soon as the next day you can't believe how much better you feel, and every day after that is an adventure in rediscovering how good it feels to breathe, and not cough, no tickles in the throat, or noises in the lungs. And you have
real energy again! You even look better. And you can lay on your back and watch TV, breathing comfortably. Indeed it's all a miracle.
Give yourself time to learn to use the
PV (get a 510, very consistent little device). And take your time deciding if you want to cut down on the Nicotine. You probably were not getting any from cigarettes if you had trouble inhaling....so cutting the Nic shouldn't be too hard. Learn to make juice, have fun.
Soooo, I can't wait to hear about your progress, day to day, week to week. Don't worry, be happy, you've got
hope now!

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