How do people react to your illness?

[Walrus]

Unwanted sympathy, Walrus? Who ever wants to be in a position that sympathy is needed! But sometimes that's all people have to give.

I have all day, every day to think about my situation and how much it sucks. When I'm with friends I want to escape it... the last thing I want is to keep rehashing it over and over again. I know people mean well, but if they really want to help, they'll let the elephant out of the room... or better yet, not bring it in in the first place. I know they want the best for me. That goes unspoken... and the best for me most of the time is to not bring it up.

It also has a lot to do with relatability. The few people I am comfortable discussing it with are dealing with their own issues. We understand each other, and support each other.

I guess I have issues... but I think the shallowest words in the English language are "I'm sorry" unless the speaker themselves did something wrong. Don't be sorry, you didn't do it. I spend a lot of time trying not to feel sorry for myself. I don't want others to either.

[lordmage]

I spend a lot of time trying not to feel sorry for myself. I don't want others to either.

Testify brother amen when did you get mod status and where besides your social side mod stuff :P cratz to that if anyone has the time it is you.

[dawnlori]

I tell very few people about my HepC. There are many preconceived notions about it and if you are uninformed than I don't wanna talk to you about it. That statement is not directed at you guys in anyway, thats is how I feel about the general public. I have only lived in this small town for about a yr and there is no way I would tell anyone, it's very clickish here and I don't need to explain it to abunch of snobs. Even the PA I saw here for an ear infection asked me 'how did you get it?'. That just pisses me off especially from a med. professional. What the hell difference does it make how I got it! I'm here for my F^&* ear. Sorry, I don't mean to get off on a rant LOL. I actually had a girl come over to my house while I was on treatment (which is brutal by the way) and start carrying on to me about how she was dating a guy that I had dated 5yrs previous and she was afraid that she was gonna die cause he might have gotten something from me blah blah blah. Needless to say, sick or not I had to throw her ass out the door. Sometimes I do need to talk about it and thats why I joined you guys. Thanks for letting me vent. dawn

[tescela]

2. When people experience a tragedy or a trauma that you have not experienced yourself, its best to just express your support and not try to guess what they are going through and add your own commentary.

I *so* wish more people understood this.

[tescela]

When I told my brothers and sisters about my son being diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, one of my brothers said "oh, he's just pulling your leg, he can act normal if he wants to."

Wow...some people really are too stupid to live.

[Christina]

Wow...some people really are too stupid to live.

LOL! I've often said that about human breeding.

[Mary Kay]

Walrus,
with all you are going through, diabetes has to be at the bottom of your "to worry about" list! LOL I think I should be grateful it's at my top.
Mamu, My G'ma had paranoid Schizophenia, in a long line of the mentaly challenged in her family. She also had 2 personalitys. That was a trip! One day she was a Church going lady with gray hair and dowdy clothes. The next she was a red wigged, hard drinking and smoking mama. This continued until she was in her late 60's. My Mother and Sister both had some problems, possible Bi-Polar but if my sister hadn't died young, I think it would have become much more serious. Both G'ma and Mom had/have Alziemer's.
The hard part about all this was I had to deal with G'ma when she was in a "spell" and my Sister as my Mom couldn't. I did that (and still take care of Mom) from the age of 13. You haven't lived until you try to bail your G'ma out of jail when you can't even drive yet!
I feel for the caregivers almost as much as I do the ones with the disorder because they are so misunderstood and dismissed. G'ma always claimed she didn't remember what had happened when she was the "other". But I know she did and it hurt.
And if you are wondering, I was adopted so I am not next in line for those disorders..I bring my own!

[TDM]

When my aunt called all upset that she had to have a hysterectomy she was all upset. I talked with her for over an hour letting her get it all out. I could tell she was really upset.

I finally figured she needed a pick-me-up so I tried to make her laugh. I told her there was a bright side to it........... She didn't have to worry about ever getting pregnant! She laughed for the next 15 minutes. She even went to her doctors appt the next day and asked the doctor if she could get pregnant! He just about fell out of his seat!!

Did I mention she was 73 at the time!

Sometimes laughter is a good medicine

[Kate51]

When my aunt called all upset that she had to have a hysterectomy she was all upset. I talked with her for over an hour letting her get it all out. I could tell she was really upset.

I finally figured she needed a pick-me-up so I tried to make her laugh. I told her there was a bright side to it........... She didn't have to worry about ever getting pregnant! She laughed for the next 15 minutes. She even went to her doctors appt the next day and asked the doctor if she could get pregnant! He just about fell out of his seat!!

Did I mention she was 73 at the time!

Sometimes laughter is a good medicine

When they told me I had to have one, I would have stood up and cheered if I could have!!!! I was pretty sick kitty, had to do a bowel resection too, had a blowout from a huge cyst on the backside of the uterus. Almost died. But I wasn't 73, either, maybe wouldn't have been so happy either. But your theory works, doesn't it. Go in there with a poochy sad face and it makes everything worse. grave even. My husbands' sister were that way with his mother, by the time we left she was laughing about something every time...I think it actually made sisters MAD. They were awful. Rubbing her arm, Geez, if my kids did that I'd haul off and smack em good.

[Mary Kay]

I love it Mouse! That was the perfect thing to say to make her laugh.
It was even better to for her to make the Dr. lose it. I bet that made her day!