Are You Caring For Someone with a Physical/Mental Disability?

[Jules22871]

I am so sorry that you all are going thru all of this. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. Sometimes it just seem like they mediical professionals aren't well, professional at all. It's all about money and how fast they can get in and out and on with their day. I wish you all the best.

[jen28f]

I am sorry for your mom and your family, MK. I have gone through this myself with my father with Alzheimers and mother with cancer. These hospitals and care homes can be so unbelievably uncaring, it makes me wonder why in the world some of these folks chose the professions that they did. As an example, my mother was in a nursing home after having cancer on and off for years. The last time she was in terrible shape...she was barely there, physically and mentally. There were strict orders that her rails on her bed must be kept up at all times...but an aide came in and put them down (we still don't know why) and she fell out of bed, hit her head, threw a clot and died from that!
And as we know, unless we are vigilant for our family and friends care, it is very rare that there will be someone at the home/hospital that will watch out, ask questions, etc.
God Bless you for doing what you can, keeping the rage to a minimum when it is difficult, and holding down the fort in general!
Your mom is a real beauty. Thanks for sharing, and be sure to keep us as your sounding board.

[Mary Kay]

At the hospital on Monday.

[Mary Kay]

Mom pulled out her feeding tube last night! It seems she was getting her thyroid meds in it. The other Nurse didn't know what the meds was for some reason. When you have a hyper thyroid they normally just kill it with Radiation, iodine or surgery. They only give drugs to supress it when the others are not an option. Maybe that Nurse never had to give that drug before.
At any rate, now she can't get her meds! She refuses to have the nasal tube, she would just pull it out further damaging her throat. I am at wits end and she is in pain from laying in bed for so long.
This is so hard on her!

[Jules22871]

I am so sorry to hear this MK. I can sympathize with your mother. I lay here on my couch day in and day out and the pain in my hips/pelvis and back just gets worse every day. I can see how she can get discouraged

Is there any way you can possibly be there bright and early? Doctors usually make their rounds starting around 6am. The only way you are going to get help for her is to talk directly to him and not go thru a nurse. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with nurses. They are awesome people and usually will do all they can to help you. But sometimes you just have to take the bull by the horns and demand to see the doctor. When we had our wreck it lacerated my liver really bad. The hospitalist couldn't for the life of him figure out what was keeping my liver function tests up so high. I tried telling the nurse it was the liquid Lortab they were giving me every 3 hours. I got 2 doses of liquid 10mg lortab with 650mg acetominifen (sp?) every 3 hours. That is way to much for a normal person let alone someone with a liver injury and I knew this but being in the pain I was in from all the injuries I really wasn't thinking all that straight. I finally was straight enough to tell the doctor this myself. He didn't even realize I was on it. Granted I had 6 different doctors seeing me every day but you would think they would know what meds I was on. What I'm getting at is the doctor may not even realize what is really going on and may need you to tell him. You are a very smart and articulate lady. I'm sure you can get your concerns across to him very well and help your mother get some relief and better care.

I pulled out my breathing tube while in the trauma ICU. Somehow I got out of the restraints and pulled that tube out. I still have a big gouged space in the roof of my mouth where I tore it open doing that. Amazing what we can do and not even realize it.

[greyeyes]

You and your Mom are in my thoughts Mary Kay. I lost my Mom two years ago due to MRSA.

Debbie

[Mary Kay]

Thank you Debbie and Jules.
The last few days mom has been talking about long dead people, my sister, her mother and others. Today she asked if grandma had died, My Grandmother died 15 years ago.

It's really hard on her to come in and out of reality. One minute she knows where she is but not why, the next she thinks she is at home and wonders who all these people are. She is also seeing people and things that aren't there, today it was a little cat!
She still has MRSA and can't be fed. She must be down to 90 lbs by now.
The nurses are frustrated because she pulls out IV's and her wristbands.

At least she has quit trying to get out of bed and stopped pulling off her heart monitor. Last week she was trying to make a phone call on it.
I have told her if she is ready to go be with the family she can, I would be O.K.
She promised to call me when she was ready to go..not sure how she would call or on what device. Also it's not clear if she meant she would call when she was ready to go home (to my house) or to pass away.

At this point I am dreading any calls at all!

[Kelly79]

MK sorry things are so rough right now.

[Michele]

MK...my thoughts and prayers are with you, your mother, and family. I totally understand what you're going through--I won't bother you with the details, but suffice it to say, it's a long emotional haul and I feel for you. Hang in there girl!

[Mary Kay]

53 hours in the Nursing home and back to E.R. tonight! They put her upstairs at about 10pm. So much for better.
She has food from her feeding tube backing up (like acid reflux) and going into her lungs. her lungs are infected. She can't swallow or cough, so it goes down the wrong way. Her B.P. is too low and her kidneys are not doing good, she is dehydrated. The E.R. Dr said she didn't get like this in 53 hours, it was this way when she left the hospital Thurs. afternoon.
All Mom is worried about is why Mike let me redecorate with so many curtains. She's talking about the curtains around her bed in the E.R.
Mike "let" me? That will be the day!
So now we start over.