First, I want to say that I love that this site has a blog area. I'm a writer, and I LOVE to blog.
I started smoking in 2007. I smoked a little bit in high school, but not long enough or often enough to get addicted. I met my husband in 2007, and we got married only five months after we met. I knew he smoked, but he didn't smoke much, and I didn't think too much of it.
For our honeymoon, we flew to Orlando, and then spent a few days there before going on a cruise to the Bahamas. I noticed that he seemed to smoke more often, and he was going outside a lot. I didn't want him to go outside by himself (dumb), so I asked him if I could smoke with him. That was how I got started. I told myself that I would quit when we got home from our honeymoon, and this was just something enjoyable we would do together.
When we got home, I came down with a case of pneumonia, but I kept right on smoking. I didn't stop, and I realized that I was addicted. Of course, I didn't think it was really that big a deal.
I never wanted to quit. I liked it, and I liked that it gave me a reason to take a break for a few minutes throughout the day. A break from my kids, a break from everything. I liked hanging out with my husband on the porch and smoking. We would talk, and reconnect, and it seemed nice.
Eventually, we decided that we wanted to have a child of our own. My two kids were from my previous marriage, and we wanted to have a baby together. We quit smoking, and eventually I got pregnant. Once my son was born, I started smoking again, only this time I was smoking behind my husband's back. I was home all day with the baby, and while the kids were in school, I would sneak outside and smoke. This went on for months, and then finally I told him what I had been doing. He was pretty good about it. He asked me if he could have one (haha) and I told him I didn't want to quit. He started smoking again too, and we went on that way for quite some time.
Eventually, he told me he wanted us to quit again. We used Chantix, and I did quit for a while. Then, of course, I started doing it behind his back again. The rest is a bit of a blur. A bunch of starting, stopping, feeling guilty for smoking behind his back, etc.
Most recently, we quit in April 2013. We started using disposable ecigs, and they worked for a while. I kind of went "cold turkey" from the disposables, and things were OK for a few months. One day I got a craving though, and no matter what I did, I couldn't get the craving to subside. I ended up going and buying a pack. I started smoking behind his back again, and tried to stop but I just couldn't. Lots of other stuff happened, including both of us smoking together on vacation, and then starting up again full time for a little while this past winter. In January, we decided to quit again, and I think I made it about two days using only the disposable ecig that time. Monday morning once he went to work and the kids went to school, I went right back out and bought a pack. I struggled with it all through the month of February and most of March.
Finally, I just got mad. I was starting to really hate the way I felt/smelled. I hated the routine I had established for myself and I felt like the biggest liar in the world. Last Friday morning I bought a pack, and I think I might have smoked about five of them before I got ticked off at myself and threw them away. I had a Blu disposable, and I just told myself that the weekend was the perfect time to start, and I was going to do this thing.
Saturday morning, I went for a walk, and I decided to see if I could "recover" the cigs I threw away. I had thrown them away in the cemetery near where we live. They were gone. Then I told myself, "I'm just not going to smoke today." I decided I wasn't going to think about what I was giving up for the rest of my life. I just wasn't going to smoke TODAY. Sunday I told myself the same thing. Come Monday morning, I was very happy to just keep using the Blu.
I started doing some research about the different kids of ecigs, and I decided that I would talk to my husband about purchasing one for myself. He didn't know (and still doesn't know) that I never really quit when he did in February. He did know that I was using the Blu when he was around. I told him that I wanted to buy one, and after some thought, he agreed that it would be OK.
I told him that I was tired of the starting/stopping/hiding, and that if I didn't do something different, it was only going to be a matter of time before I was buying more cigarettes. At least that's been my pattern. He agreed that I should do something different.
That's how I got to where I am today. It's been seven days since my last analog, and I will NEVER go back to that life of lies. Never. I am so happy that I found this forum, and that you guys give such good information. I'm blessed, and I'm thankful that ecigs exist.
I believe they have saved my life, and quite possibly, my marriage.
I started smoking in 2007. I smoked a little bit in high school, but not long enough or often enough to get addicted. I met my husband in 2007, and we got married only five months after we met. I knew he smoked, but he didn't smoke much, and I didn't think too much of it.
For our honeymoon, we flew to Orlando, and then spent a few days there before going on a cruise to the Bahamas. I noticed that he seemed to smoke more often, and he was going outside a lot. I didn't want him to go outside by himself (dumb), so I asked him if I could smoke with him. That was how I got started. I told myself that I would quit when we got home from our honeymoon, and this was just something enjoyable we would do together.
When we got home, I came down with a case of pneumonia, but I kept right on smoking. I didn't stop, and I realized that I was addicted. Of course, I didn't think it was really that big a deal.
I never wanted to quit. I liked it, and I liked that it gave me a reason to take a break for a few minutes throughout the day. A break from my kids, a break from everything. I liked hanging out with my husband on the porch and smoking. We would talk, and reconnect, and it seemed nice.
Eventually, we decided that we wanted to have a child of our own. My two kids were from my previous marriage, and we wanted to have a baby together. We quit smoking, and eventually I got pregnant. Once my son was born, I started smoking again, only this time I was smoking behind my husband's back. I was home all day with the baby, and while the kids were in school, I would sneak outside and smoke. This went on for months, and then finally I told him what I had been doing. He was pretty good about it. He asked me if he could have one (haha) and I told him I didn't want to quit. He started smoking again too, and we went on that way for quite some time.
Eventually, he told me he wanted us to quit again. We used Chantix, and I did quit for a while. Then, of course, I started doing it behind his back again. The rest is a bit of a blur. A bunch of starting, stopping, feeling guilty for smoking behind his back, etc.
Most recently, we quit in April 2013. We started using disposable ecigs, and they worked for a while. I kind of went "cold turkey" from the disposables, and things were OK for a few months. One day I got a craving though, and no matter what I did, I couldn't get the craving to subside. I ended up going and buying a pack. I started smoking behind his back again, and tried to stop but I just couldn't. Lots of other stuff happened, including both of us smoking together on vacation, and then starting up again full time for a little while this past winter. In January, we decided to quit again, and I think I made it about two days using only the disposable ecig that time. Monday morning once he went to work and the kids went to school, I went right back out and bought a pack. I struggled with it all through the month of February and most of March.
Finally, I just got mad. I was starting to really hate the way I felt/smelled. I hated the routine I had established for myself and I felt like the biggest liar in the world. Last Friday morning I bought a pack, and I think I might have smoked about five of them before I got ticked off at myself and threw them away. I had a Blu disposable, and I just told myself that the weekend was the perfect time to start, and I was going to do this thing.
Saturday morning, I went for a walk, and I decided to see if I could "recover" the cigs I threw away. I had thrown them away in the cemetery near where we live. They were gone. Then I told myself, "I'm just not going to smoke today." I decided I wasn't going to think about what I was giving up for the rest of my life. I just wasn't going to smoke TODAY. Sunday I told myself the same thing. Come Monday morning, I was very happy to just keep using the Blu.
I started doing some research about the different kids of ecigs, and I decided that I would talk to my husband about purchasing one for myself. He didn't know (and still doesn't know) that I never really quit when he did in February. He did know that I was using the Blu when he was around. I told him that I wanted to buy one, and after some thought, he agreed that it would be OK.
I told him that I was tired of the starting/stopping/hiding, and that if I didn't do something different, it was only going to be a matter of time before I was buying more cigarettes. At least that's been my pattern. He agreed that I should do something different.
That's how I got to where I am today. It's been seven days since my last analog, and I will NEVER go back to that life of lies. Never. I am so happy that I found this forum, and that you guys give such good information. I'm blessed, and I'm thankful that ecigs exist.
I believe they have saved my life, and quite possibly, my marriage.
