So sorry FC, particularly about the ending. I experienced that with a cat that just decided if I was in the room, she had to be on me. I'd go to sleep and she curled right up along side me. I had her for 16/17 years when she woke me at 2 in the morning howling in pain.
I endured it until 9AM when the vet opened and got an appt. at 10. The vet looked her over and, of course, would need to do tests to try to establish what was wrong. I said no, just put her down. She never had a problem in all those years, I wasn't going to make her suffer any more than she had suffered that morning.
Well, I was wrong. I've been
thru the process quite a few times before, but nothing like that morning. It was so bad that when my Golden's turn came, the greatest dog I ever had, I stayed with him until he had the sedative and was sleeping peacefully. When the vet came in, I (crying as I type this) just told him I didn't want to stay. The memory of Cannie was just too brutal.