Kawfee beanz, DIY and assorted Shenaniganery :)

[DingerCPA]

No Lakeland the 15 through the weekend, the next week Tallahassee. Dang! Is your SO in Sarasota?

Bradenton, actually. Taking her the car in a few weeks. I'll fly back down to drive her home.

Well, I'm back at the hospital. Apparently they are going to keep her through the weekend. Not sure if that is a good or a bad thing. She is VERY loopy tonight. Couldn't quite manage to feed herself, so I fed her some mashed potatoes and stuffed chicken breast from room service and gave her the insulin she needed. She keeps forgetting that she has already eaten. I know that it is just the meds causing it all, but it is heartbreaking. Over the past couple of years, I have slowly lost the woman that I married. She isn't the same as she once was... Now, don't get me wrong, I do NOT love her any less! I vowed to stand by her side no matter what, and that will never change. But I find myself missing the woman that I fell in love with. I know that we all change over the years as we learn and grow, but it isn't supposed to be like this. Sometimes this world, this life, can be cruel and unfair. I just feel like she has been robbed of a life that 'could have been', and sometimes I can't help but to rage and scream at the universe for the suffering that she bears without complaint. I feel that I must do this on her behalf, because the kindness in her heart won't allow her to do it herself.

Don't know exactly where all of this is coming from, or why I feel compelled to just let it all hang out tonight, but there it is. Guess I just felt like venting a bit, and there is nowhere else that I feel as safe as I do with all of you... Thank you, my friends, my family... I hope you all know just how much each and every one of you means to me.

I'm glad they're keeping her - it sounds like the right thing to do for now. My heart is breaking for the two of you. Rage as you need - don't bottle it up. It may sound trite, but I can empathize with you.

 

[oldbroad]

Well, I'm back at the hospital. Apparently they are going to keep her through the weekend. Not sure if that is a good or a bad thing. She is VERY loopy tonight. Couldn't quite manage to feed herself, so I fed her some mashed potatoes and stuffed chicken breast from room service and gave her the insulin she needed. She keeps forgetting that she has already eaten. I know that it is just the meds causing it all, but it is heartbreaking. Over the past couple of years, I have slowly lost the woman that I married. She isn't the same as she once was... Now, don't get me wrong, I do NOT love her any less! I vowed to stand by her side no matter what, and that will never change. But I find myself missing the woman that I fell in love with. I know that we all change over the years as we learn and grow, but it isn't supposed to be like this. Sometimes this world, this life, can be cruel and unfair. I just feel like she has been robbed of a life that 'could have been', and sometimes I can't help but to rage and scream at the universe for the suffering that she bears without complaint. I feel that I must do this on her behalf, because the kindness in her heart won't allow her to do it herself.

Don't know exactly where all of this is coming from, or why I feel compelled to just let it all hang out tonight, but there it is. Guess I just felt like venting a bit, and there is nowhere else that I feel as safe as I do with all of you... Thank you, my friends, my family... I hope you all know just how much each and every one of you means to me.

Oh Kaezz...I wish I could be there with you so that you could vent with all your might , knowing that someone cares and is right there physically, and I'm also sure that many many of us feel the same way.

You will please vent all you want at this time. I'm only able to give you great big strong hugs via the internet, but know that I got a cramp in my shoulders right now from it and I would gladly keep them ole cramps as long as necessary.

 

[Bea-FL]

Well, I'm back at the hospital. Apparently they are going to keep her through the weekend. Not sure if that is a good or a bad thing. She is VERY loopy tonight. Couldn't quite manage to feed herself, so I fed her some mashed potatoes and stuffed chicken breast from room service and gave her the insulin she needed. She keeps forgetting that she has already eaten. I know that it is just the meds causing it all, but it is heartbreaking. Over the past couple of years, I have slowly lost the woman that I married. She isn't the same as she once was... Now, don't get me wrong, I do NOT love her any less! I vowed to stand by her side no matter what, and that will never change. But I find myself missing the woman that I fell in love with. I know that we all change over the years as we learn and grow, but it isn't supposed to be like this. Sometimes this world, this life, can be cruel and unfair. I just feel like she has been robbed of a life that 'could have been', and sometimes I can't help but to rage and scream at the universe for the suffering that she bears without complaint. I feel that I must do this on her behalf, because the kindness in her heart won't allow her to do it herself.

Don't know exactly where all of this is coming from, or why I feel compelled to just let it all hang out tonight, but there it is. Guess I just felt like venting a bit, and there is nowhere else that I feel as safe as I do with all of you... Thank you, my friends, my family... I hope you all know just how much each and every one of you means to me.

((((((Hugs))))) When a catastrophic disease affects a spouse or SO or our child it affects us too. We suffer for them and with them. And we need somewhere, someone we feel safe with to vent when it gets too hard to bear.

I'm so glad you have so many friends here with whom you have that safe place when you need it. We dont know each other as well but if there is anything I can do please tell me.

 

[Kaezziel]

Bradenton, actually. Taking her the car in a few weeks. I'll fly back down to drive her home.



I'm glad they're keeping her - it sounds like the right thing to do for now. My heart is breaking for the two of you. Rage as you need - don't bottle it up. It may sound trite, but I can empathize with you.

I agree, Love. I absolutely agree. And that isn't trite at all! You know me well enough to know that I am not so naive as to believe that neither my feelings nor my situation are unique. Your struggle is equally heartbreaking! I couldn't imagine sending my Darling Bride away for months at a time... even if it were for her own benefit. I mean, I understand the logic behind it, but I'd be a damn mess! I love you, Sister. Bless your heart for all that you do and endure!

 

[Kenna]

What. a. week.....

Mommee is plumb tuckered out. Had a minor pharmaceutical issue that SO needs sorted out. BLERGH. Then, I get home, and ALL the kidz are P-sychotic. But, I got my new Origen16 RDA clone, and issss ADORABLE!

View attachment 629789

I have an O16 on my Reo. Love that little thingy!

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[tejas]

((((((((((HUGE HUGS right back))))))))))
Thank you, SweetPea! Honestly, I'm not really feeling sad, or angry, our anything like that right now... Just feeling a bit introspective, I guess. I typed that more out of compulsion to share my inner journey than for any other reason. Maybe, just maybe, my sharing can help someone else, or validate someone else's feelings. I don't know, it just felt important that I share it.

You are the strongest person I know Brother. Vent your skinny behind off! We're here for you, and you know we luvs ya.

 

[Kenna]

((((((((((HUGE HUGS right back))))))))))
Thank you, SweetPea! Honestly, I'm not really feeling sad, or angry, our anything like that right now... Just feeling a bit introspective, I guess. I typed that more out of compulsion to share my inner journey than for any other reason. Maybe, just maybe, my sharing can help someone else, or validate someone else's feelings. I don't know, it just felt important that I share it.

We are with you in spirt, Kaez.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk

 

[DingerCPA]

I have an O16 on my Reo. Love that little thingy!

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That was another reason why I wanted to get one

 

[DingerCPA]

I agree, Love. I absolutely agree. And that isn't trite at all! You know me well enough to know that I am not so naive as to believe that neither my feelings nor my situation are unique. Your struggle is equally heartbreaking! I couldn't imagine sending my Darling Bride away for months at a time... even if it were for her own benefit. I mean, I understand the logic behind it, but I'd be a damn mess! I love you, Sister. Bless your heart for all that you do and endure!

I guess that's why it's called "LOVE".............

 

[Kaezziel]

Oh Kaezz...I wish I could be there with you so that you could vent with all your might , knowing that someone cares and is right there physically, and I'm also sure that many many of us feel the same way.

You will please vent all you want at this time. I'm only able to give you great big strong hugs via the internet, but know that I got a cramp in my shoulders right now from it and I would gladly keep them ole cramps as long as necessary.

Oh Kay! I can feel those hugs from here. If I've learned anything over my brief time here, it is that the relationships we form online can easily be as real as any traditional relationship. Sometimes they are even better, because we can get to know the *person* without any preconceived notions or prejudices. I cherish the relationships that have grown through this digital medium more than many of my "in the flesh" friendships.

((((((Hugs))))) When a catastrophic disease affects a spouse or SO or our child it affects us too. We suffer for them and with them. And we need somewhere, someone we feel safe with to vent when it gets too hard to bear.

I'm so glad you have so many friends here with whom you have that safe place when you need it. We dont know each other as well but if there is anything I can do please tell me.

Miss Bea, your relatively recent entrance into our little group and positive impact on my life are greatly appreciated. Your kindness and willingness to offer advice and help to others is admirable and is a rare gift in this day and age. Thank you for all that you say and do, and thank you for sticking with us through our insanities!

 

[DingerCPA]

Kaez, try and get some rest....

 

[oldbroad]

I have a
n O16 on my Reo. Love that little thingy!

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk

The count's up to three of us so far!

 

[LynnNC]

I arrived at home to find the Internet is still on.

 

[LynnNC]

The count's up to three of us so far!

4.. I have an O16 too but it's still in the box.

 

[oldbroad]

4.. I have an O16 too but it's still in the box.

Well git 'er on a mod!

It's all lonesome in that ole box! it's wantin' some hands-on attention!

 

[Kaezziel]

You are the strongest person I know Brother. Vent your skinny behind off! We're here for you, and you know we luvs ya.

It's funny, because I don't particularly think of myself as being all that strong. I just seem to trudge through the days most of the time and am happy when I manage to make it through one in one piece! I do appreciate you saying that, though. That truly means a lot to me coming from you, because I think I have a pretty good grasp of the strength of your character and resolve. You're a good man, Brother, and one of these days. I'd love to have a beer with ya!

We are with you in spirt, Kaez.

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I know ya are, Darlin'. And some days, that is what gets me through. Just knowing that there are people out there that truly care and are willing to listen to our story. Willing to take time out of their own busy and trying lives to offer strength to a relative "stranger". You guys and gals do more to renew my faith in humanity than anyone else ever has!

I guess that's why it's called "LOVE".............

You're probably right. There is no other word, or string of words that could sum it up so perfectly. We, as people, had to create a word that could somehow express all of that strength and feeling else we would burst with the fullness of it.

 

[Kaezziel]

Kaez, try and get some rest....

I will, Darlin'... Just really felt like I needed to spend some time with y'all. My Darling Bride is finally resting comfortably and getting some much needed sleep; and it is kinda nice listening to her breathing in the background while I'm on here. I'll shut down shortly, myself.

I arrived at home to find the Internet is still on.

Yay!! Maybe they'll forget and we won't have to go without our SweetPea!

 

[Kenna]

4.. I have an O16 too but it's still in the box.

Well it can't coil, wick, & vape itself! Break it out!

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[tejas]

You're a good man, Brother, and one of these days. I'd love to have a beer with ya!

Thank you...
Make it a bourbon, and I'm in!

 

[Kaezziel]

Alright... Maybe it is time for me to rack out. I keep drifting off with my finger still on the tablet screen... No telling what I might end up doing or saying!