Coffee shop altercation.

[9ball_AJ]

I was at a coffee shop today enjoying coffee, conversation, and my pv with a good friend. Shortly after we sat down another patron says to me "Hey, that is not allowed here, what is that? Is that that e-cigarette crap?" I said, yes this is my personal vaporizor. He says "Well that is not allowed here!" with a rude tone. I replied with a simple OK. A few minutes later, i went to speak with the barista on duty and asked if there were any rules at the coffee shop and if she minded if i vaped. She was more than ok with it. I continued vaping, expecting this guy to say something. After a good 1/2 hour, he packed up his things, came and sat down at my table, and proceeded to insult me and tell my why i was such an AH. We argued for a few minutes, my point being that if he would been polite, I would have gladly stopped. I finally said "Look, this conversation is going no where, sitting there insulting me and glaring at me is not going to solve anything." He says glaring is not against the rules, and proceeded to glare at me. I attempted to ignore this childish behavior, and resumed my conversation with my friend. 10 mins go by and this guy is still staring at me. The argument resumed until I gave up and got up to use the restroom. He promptly left.

Afterwards the employee came up to us to ask what it was all about, and I explained. She was still fine with me vaping in the coffee shop and she called the owner, who was also fine with it.

Thoughts?


-AJ

 

[Loveridden]

That guy was openly hostile to you and I would have been scared of him. He didn't seem like a real mature person. I'm surprised you weren't freaked out that he actually sat at your table and started berating you!!

 

[36tinybells]

You handled that well and great coffee shop support there! The guy is just a jerk. Sadly, they are all over.

 

[ibobbyvapor]

I have had a few confrontational people in my day. Being naturally sarcastic I just ask questions. Eventually they answer themselves in to a corner and I point out their contradiction.
It would go something like this:

Grumpy Person: "Smoking is bad in public places, especially indoors. Stop being a jerk."
Me: "Its not smoke its vapor." *This would be my 1st and only time I defend anything*
Grumpy Person: "It does not matter. It looks like smoke and it is rude."
Me: "Why is it rude."
Grumpy Person: "Because other people do not like it."
Me: "Then why is it that you are the only one saying something?"
Grumpy Person: "Because I'm the only one who has the nerve."
Me: "So you are saying that everyone else except you is timid? Don't you think thats a little arrogant?"
Grumpy Person: "Thats not what I said and you just insulted me."
Me: "Actually don't you think its unfair that you called me a Jerk right off the bat and you get offended when I do not call you Arrogant, but simply ask if you are?"
Grumpy Person: "This conversation is going no where."
Me: "Why do you think that."
Grumpy Person: Gets upset and leaves.

Play into their game of defending yourself and it validates their accusations in their mind. Ask them questions and they have no choice but to analyze their own logic or get upset and leave. Try it. Have fun with it.

 

[chaos-7]

In Florida We have a stand Your ground law, and We use it.

 

[Serianna]

Oh man I can only imagine the reaction I would have given that jerk! I am so sorry you had to deal with the idiot. But iBobby has it right, ask questions and it generally gets the angry person so angry they leave LOL. I would have gotten up and asked the barista to have the guy leave though. I have been known to have the manager of my fav coffee shop kick people out of it, and usually the managers are thrilled to do it, since I tend to spend lots of money there LOL.

 

[ibobbyvapor]

You did the right thing asking how the store felt about it. Having them on your side is what counts.

I was at a coffee shop today enjoying coffee, conversation, and my pv with a good friend. Shortly after we sat down another patron says to me "Hey, that is not allowed here, what is that? Is that that e-cigarette crap?" I said, yes this is my personal vaporizor. He says "Well that is not allowed here!" with a rude tone. I replied with a simple OK. A few minutes later, i went to speak with the barista on duty and asked if there were any rules at the coffee shop and if she minded if i vaped. She was more than ok with it. I continued vaping, expecting this guy to say something. After a good 1/2 hour, he packed up his things, came and sat down at my table, and proceeded to insult me and tell my why i was such an AH. We argued for a few minutes, my point being that if he would been polite, I would have gladly stopped. I finally said "Look, this conversation is going no where, sitting there insulting me and glaring at me is not going to solve anything." He says glaring is not against the rules, and proceeded to glare at me. I attempted to ignore this childish behavior, and resumed my conversation with my friend. 10 mins go by and this guy is still staring at me. The argument resumed until I gave up and got up to use the restroom. He promptly left.

Afterwards the employee came up to us to ask what it was all about, and I explained. She was still fine with me vaping in the coffee shop and she called the owner, who was also fine with it.

Thoughts?


-AJ

 

[mwa102464]

I think you absolutely did the right thing by asking the Barista if vaping was OK in the shop. Personally if it where me I would have done the same,,then if the guy had sat down at my table after me asking the barsita if I could vape and he continued to be loud and rude and obnoxious he would have caught a right hook before he knew what hit him and been having hot coffee poured on his face to wake him up from the knock out and I might have put him to sleep a 2nd time if he didnt mind his p's & Q's

 

[Retriever]

You got permission, which was the right thing to do. He did not get permission to insult you. Glad you had the establishment on your side. I think in the coming years that is what it will all be about - having the "powers that be" on your side.

 

[kumquat]

I probably would have punched him and gotten thrown out, but I have rage issues. Sounds like you handled it well. Bravo.

 

[dotma]

AJ, there are a lotta nutballs downtown -- he was probably one of them!

 

[kidbeaster]

I probably would have punched him and gotten thrown out, but I have rage issues. Sounds like you handled it well. Bravo.

I agree...He would have been staring at my knuckles.

I understand the vaping/smoking image. But when they get right in your face, well...they just ask for it.

 

[scalewiz]

Oops, sorry, but your angry tone got me so upset, I was shaking...sorry you were in the way when I spilled my coffee...does it burn?

 

[jpracing]

Oops, sorry, but your angry tone got me so upset, I was shaking...sorry you were in the way when I spilled my coffee...does it burn?

The Best!!

 

[Shizzle]

wow, i'm so angry right now after just reading what you went through!

after speaking with the barista and getting the okay, i would have immediately informed them about this idiot sitting at my table uninvited and harrassing me...upon which, he should have been told to knock it off and move, or leave.

(and, as others mentioned, i would have been very tempted to sock him, too...although i don't know how effective it would've been...as i somehow suspect that my height, weight, gender and age wouldn't exactly add up to being a force to be reckoned with )

 

[dotma]

You know at times like that having a sense of humour would'nt hurt. If i was in your shoes at the time i would probably have said something that was completely unrelated to what he was saying like "well thats just racism,this is because i am black right,for 400 years we as a people have had to endure abuse from people like you". Insane but funny. I would'nt be able to take people like that seriously. I would have said a whole load of other stuff just for fun, not offensive either. He would probably have cracked eventually. But if he did'nt he should quit and **** off while he's doing it.

hahahahahahaha -- I LOVE this idea!

 

[ibobbyvapor]

I'm loving the posts here giving support. The ones with humor are also very fun.

 

[9ball_AJ]

Wow, after a couple days now, I am still shocked i didn't sock that guy. Thanks for the suggestions, I wish I had "the gift of the gab" as they say. I am glad I did not make the situation any worse for the barista, and all in all it is now just a funny story.

I was also pretty amazed my friend stayed quiet. He is more the scrappy, get in my face and you will pay type of guy. I go to that coffee shop whenever I am in Spokane, so we'll see if I run into him again. It may not be so pretty next time...

-AJ

 

[unassuming]

Unless I'm reading wrong, the guy actually got up and sat at your table? I can't place why, but something about that boils my blood. Good on you for remaining calm, and not escalating the issue into a shouting match or fistfight. Sitting at your table makes me think that's exactly what the guy wanted.

 

[9ball_AJ]

Unless I'm reading wrong, the guy actually got up and sat at your table? I can't place why, but something about that boils my blood. Good on you for remaining calm, and not escalating the issue into a shouting match or fistfight. Sitting at your table makes me think that's exactly what the guy wanted.

Yep, packed up his ipad, got up and came and sat at my table and got right in my face. Fists were clenched, but I really didn't want to get into a fight at that moment. If I had a few beers in me, who knows...