I quit several years ago with the patch, but always craved cigarettes, even dreamed about them. When a particularly stressful time came around, I used it as an excuse to start smoking again.
A few of years ago, I used an e-cigarette to help wean myself down on cigarettes, but the e-cigs at that time were a new novelty and weren't very good, didn't hold a charge long and the carts were messy and not very tasty. But, I got down to only a couple of cigarettes a day, down from a pack a day. Then, an even messier, more stressful period came (tornado, forced job move, and high personality conflicts), and screw it, I was back on the tobacco cigarettes even harder than before.
My mother had breast cancer. She initially survived, but she was never able to quit smoking, and less than 10 years later, she died, young at 58, after cancer came again in the form of lung cancer which spread throughout her body quickly. With numerous brain tumors, the doctors told her to get her affairs in order, and told the rest of the family not to dwell on her smoking, and to let her have whatever she wanted, because in 6 weeks it would be over. It was 8 weeks.
Well, the 10th anniversary of my mother's death from cancer came along, and I began to seriously consider quitting smoking again, but even though I've kept my promise to her of getting screened every year, I still hadn't put down the tobacco cigarettes. Then came the 20th anniversary of her breast cancer surgery, and that nagging in the back of my mind became a little more constant.
Then I realized this year that I'd entered the "cancer zone," the age time frame when when my mother first was diagnosed with breast cancer, and I knew I had to stop smoking. Just had to. I knew the gum wouldn't work, and the patches just were not enough. I didn't want more prescriptions entering my cabinets, especially if they could make a person half crazy or react badly with any of my other medicines. So, I went online and researched the current e-cigarette situation. There had been many improvements and a whole lot more choices since the last time I used one. I decided to try a brand which seemed to get the most positive reviews, and ordered the best kit they had. Then, I smoked my last cigarette, refusing to buy a new pack of cigarettes, on what would have been my grandmother's 95th birthday on February 12, 2012 (she died just a month before her 92nd birthday, and she too, had breast cancer).
There were delays in the shipping of my e-cigarette kit, and 7 days after dropping tobacco cigarettes, I was going into some pretty serious anxiety and withdrawal symptoms. I remembered having read that a drugstore chain carried disposable e-cigarettes, so I drove over to the local store and picked up two disposables. They were not the brand I'd ordered, but I was rather desperate at the time. I opened one and started the vape, and after only two draws I got a bit dizzy and nauseous, and knew that these disposables were a lot stronger than what I was used to. I looked them up online when I got home and found them to contain 24mg of nicotine, which really made me go whoa! I was glad I'd ordered 12mg with my kit. Nonetheless, a couple of draws on those disposables now and then got me through until my ordered kit came. And from there, when my kit finally arrived, I realized I was going to make it ok. The batteries I'd ordered were excellent, I found some great carts, and I've not once touched a tobacco cigarette since that last one in February, and I'm quite happy and content with my vaping, which I've already taken down to 6mg and 0mg with a multitude of different cartridges and eLiquids I like.
So, I chose option 2, it took a little effort, but I was ready, and I made it through. I'm drinking a lot more water (I'd always been on the side of dehydration with tobacco cigarettes, but now I'm watching this carefully). I can breathe so much easier. I am coughing up a bunch of junk from my lungs still, but it has eased up in the last couple of days and I'm really starting to feel good. I had mouth sores for about 3 days, but those have cleared up. I had a small "abscess" in my mouth for a few years after having a tooth pulled that doctors and dentists didn't want to bother with, and it,too, cleared up. It used to clear up a bit if I was on antibiotics for any reason, but always came back. Now, it is gone.
And I'm a vaping fool. I still have 12mg available to me, for those really stressful times, but I'm really handling things a lot better than I was before at work and at home, and I realize now that tobacco cigarettes gave me a crutch, but they didn't help me feel any better about myself, didn't solve any problems, kept me well addicted, and they were very much killing me slowly. Vaping is much different. I feel a whole lot better both physically and mentally. And... I vape 0mg sweet flavors in the evening, so I don't head over to the refrigerator to supplement the loss of a hand to mouth action. I wasn't expecting all that, and I'm very, very happy with these unexpected and refreshing side affects of vaping!
I'm going to be ok, Mom. I promise.