Ex-smoker's point of view

[VIVAP2]

Hey All,

I just wanted to share that experience with the community and would like to have your thoughts on this. As I was at a CD band release sunday night, I sat at a table of a group of 8 persons I know from decades but I don't frequent them on a regular basis. Half the group are ex-smoker, the other half are smokers. I was all proud to say that I quit smoking and now instead vaping. They all unanimously rejected it, disagreed even with my best argument trying to demonstrate its benefits.

Smokers said stuff like: "you smoke or you don't. It must be as harmful as cigarettes." And other misunderstanding comments about the concept. They were not receptive to my arguements.

An ex-smoker told me something that I feel she is quite right on her point of view:
" I quit smoking not that long ago, it has been so hard to quit that habit. Now I am here, in a non-smoking establishment and I see clouds of smoke at my table. This gets me ...... off."

You know what? I think she's right. vaping in public is somehow of a disrespect and it shouldn't be done that way. I think I should then stealth vape or vape with smokers, outside.

What do you think?

 

[zer0ith]

I think it's up to the place your at as well as the company you are with or around you. If people are good with it great, if they have a problem then do the courteous thing and oblige.

Last night we were at a casino for my bowling banquet. I checked with staff and asked if I could. Each of them said "it's not a real cigarette, so you can enjoy it all you want".

While we were in the casino I was standing behind my woman while she was using one of the slots and vaping and the person 2 machines down from her asked me what I was doing. I explained and asked her if it bothered her. She said it made her want a smoke. (I tried converting her but she didn't bite) I asked if she would like me to stop and she said no, if they let me do it in there she didn't care but was curious about them.

No one did complain while we were there.

I truly think its all about how you handle an issue if/when it comes up. If your a doink about it.... Well you deserve what you get.

 

[Rttch]

Vaping is different, but with the plethora of people who start and want everything to "look" like a real smoke, I can see her point about also seeing what looks like a cloud of smoke. I see someone light up with a real lighter and a real cigarette with real smoke and I still feel nostalgia for it (even though I won't go back to it). Just seeing it can be a reminder of how hard the journey is for other people who have quit and haven't substituted it with vaping. Sometimes, even with vaping as my substitute, I still want to try "one last one" when I see someone else with an analog.

 

[Oriana871]

They all unanimously rejected it, disagreed even with my best argument trying to demonstrate its benefits.

Smokers said stuff like: "you smoke or you don't. It must be as harmful as cigarettes." And other misunderstanding comments about the concept. They were not receptive to my arguements.

An ex-smoker told me something that I feel she is quite right on her point of view:
" I quit smoking not that long ago, it has been so hard to quit that habit. Now I am here, in a non-smoking establishment and I see clouds of smoke at my table. This gets me ...... off."

I get it and I don't. First off the smokers comments are ridiculous, sorry. They're in denial.

The non-smoker... well I can see their point, but then it starts getting in to the territory of "I'm weak so I can't be around whatever my addiction is or whatever resembles my addiction". I understand that, however at some point she's going to have to become stronger, because she will come across smoking, even if it's by her very friends. She's is in effect blaming you for her weakness.

I've met two people in the past month who recently quit smoking - I offered them a vape and they declined, saying they were good without anything. I sat and vaped next to them and they didn't flinch or get upset about it.

Edited to say that I'm not advocating being disrespectful. If people are offended then sure be courteous. I find it interesting however that all 8 people just blew vaping off. Maybe they think it's uncool and they didn't want to be honest... anyway whatever the reason it is a bit odd. I would think at least one person would be happy for you. Please don't let the scenario discourage you. People aren't used to it and there's bound to be negative reactions, but you're ahead of the times, don't forget .

I don't want to tiptoe around ex-smokers because they can't handle the sight of smoking, that's I guess what bothered me a bit about the non-smokers gripe.

 

[Hitmetwice]

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, if we can earn it by being courteous to others, regardless
of "the rules" or lack thereof. Us vapers will be in a better position to further
our cause.

Respectful people are the first ones to gain respect from others.

I can both see and respect your friends point of view as a new non-smoker, as well as your
response.

While I'd attempt to be "stealthy" if that was not suitable to even one other person
present, outside I would go. While I'm not too hip with hanging out in the
"Smoking Area" it would also be wrong to appear to be a "vaping snob", ignoring
the smokers because it's a smelly, disgusting habit they have there.

Yeah it'd be a hassle but....the pros would outweigh the cons if properly handled. imo.

Intersesting topic and responses so far.

You seem to be very respectful person VIVAP2, FWIW you have mine also.

 

[wv2win]

.....You know what? I think she's right. Vaping in public is somehow of a disrespect and it shouldn't be done that way. I think I should then stealth vape or vape with smokers, outside.

What do you think?

I think that is BS. We are not burning tobacco or emiting smoke. If someone does not want me to vape right beside them, I would respect that but not let ignorant people label me as a smoker or that I am in any way harming them. I applaud your effort to try and educate uninformed (at best) people. But the more we let the "anti's" define what we do and who we are, then the worse it will be for the vaping community. There has been more than enough studies to confirm that nothing in the little bit of vapor we emit, is dangerous to others. Their attitude is just another form of prejudice.

 

[Maestro]

I'm not sure on this one. If someone was on a diet, should you refrain from eating where they can see? Would you stop chewing gum around them because it smells too good? If I was a recovering alcoholic, would I got to a casino and then insist that the people around me stop drinking? It always irks me when someone attempts to turn their problem into my problem.

 

[Oriana871]

I think that is BS. We are not burning tobacco or emiting smoke. If someone does not want me to vape right beside them, I would respect that but not let ignorant people label me as a smoker or that I am in any way harming them. I applaud your effort to try and educate uninformed (at best) people. But the more we let the "anti's" define what we do and who we are, then the worse it will be for the vaping community. There has been more than enough studies to confirm that nothing in the little bit of vapor we emit, is dangerous to others. Their attitude is just another form of prejuidence.

The issue isn't about the danger of second-hand vaper though, it's about an ex-addict who is still obviously struggling with her addiction having to sit and watch someone smoke in a non-smoking establishment.

 

[Oriana871]

I'm not sure on this one. If someone was on a diet, should you refrain from eating where they can see? Would you stop chewing gum around them because it smells too good? If I was a recovering alcoholic, would I got to a casino and then insist that the people around me stop drinking? It always irks me when someone attempts to turn their problem into my problem.

I get that as well, however she was in a non-smoking establishment. Well, what establishment isn't non-smoking these days? If it were back in the day, she wouldn't be able to go to any social establishment until she got completely over her current struggle.

 

[VIVAP2]

I'm not sure on this one. If someone was on a diet, should you refrain from eating where they can see? Would you stop chewing gum around them because it smells too good? If I was a recovering alcoholic, would I got to a casino and then insist that the people around me stop drinking? It always irks me when someone attempts to turn their problem into my problem.

I take note of that. Good point.

 

[ChellyNelly]

The non-smoker... well I can see their point, but then it starts getting in to the territory of "I'm weak so I can't be around whatever my addiction is or whatever resembles my addiction". I understand that, however at some point she's going to have to become stronger, because she will come across smoking, even if it's by her very friends. She's is in effect blaming you for her weakness.

Addiction isn't a weakness or a lack of willpower. I say more power to her. She quit, and we just switched addictions, so IMO she really has the leg up. She is entitled to feel however she feels about it. I can understand what she is saying. A cloud of smoke looks exactly like a cloud of vapor and when you're trying to quit something, the worst possible thing you can do is go around it. Since she doesn't know any of the ins and outs about vaping vs. smoking, it's all the same to her. It's not like she got all up in his face, or was disrespectful, or got mad, or anything. It sounds to me like she was just sharing her feelings, which make perfect sense given the fact that she has little to no knowledge on the topic.

 

[wv2win]

I'm not sure on this one. If someone was on a diet, should you refrain from eating where they can see? Would you stop chewing gum around them because it smells too good? If I was a recovering alcoholic, would I got to a casino and then insist that the people around me stop drinking? It always irks me when someone attempts to turn their problem into my problem.

The issue isn't about the danger of second-hand vaper though, it's about an ex-addict who is still obviously struggling with her addiction having to sit and watch someone smoke in a non-smoking establishment.

Maestro, stated it quite well. I don't see her weakness as my problem. When I am at a party having a drink, I don't stop drinking just because there is a recovering alcoholic at the same function.

 

[Eddie.Willers]

... Sometimes, even with vaping as my substitute, I still want to try "one last one" when I see someone else with an analog.

Hmmm...but you know you wouldn't really enjoy it, eh?

 

[VIVAP2]

Addiction isn't a weakness or a lack of willpower. I say more power to her. She quit, and we just switched addictions, so IMO she really has the leg up. She is entitled to feel however she feels about it. I can understand what she is saying. A cloud of smoke looks exactly like a cloud of vapor and when you're trying to quit something, the worst possible thing you can do is go around it. Since she doesn't know any of the ins and outs about vaping vs. smoking, it's all the same to her. It's not like she got all up in his face, or was disrespectful, or got mad, or anything. It sounds to me like she was just sharing her feelings, which make perfect sense given the fact that she has little to no knowledge on the topic.

Actually, the ex-smoker knows pretty well about this technology. Her sister bought a USA kit whit nic. Used it for 2 weeks and went back buying packs of stinkies.

 

[ChellyNelly]

Ok, sorry about that, it sounded like she didn't know what it was. That changes things a little bit but I still totally understand where she's coming from. Vaping doesn't work for everyone and she did quit, so that's good! Addiction is tough, no doubt about that.

 

[Hitmetwice]

I'd have to agree with the above points of view to a degree, but remember two things in all of this...

1. Breaking the cigarette addiction is supposedly on par to breaking an H ...... addiction as far as
how difficult it is to do. (At least thats what "they" say, and I believe it.) It is tough, has it not
been impossible for all of us to do it without vaping? Other addictions pale some to this.JMO.

2. While we, as vapers, have chosen to educate ourselves on the subject, albeit to varying degrees....
the public at large has not spent the days and days(in some instances) of research that some of
us have put in even before we bought our first kits....they have only our word, on our authority,
that what we are saying to them is the truth. We may be sure enough, but others? Not so much.

With respect...

 

[ChellyNelly]

I had an addiction to ...... and other opiates for many years and I can tell you that quitting cigarettes was absolutely nothing likely quitting that. Not even in the same realm. It really is unfair to compare the two. When I didn't have drugs I would shake, sweat, puke, pins and needles all over my body, extreme pain in my bones and muscles, ........, suicidal thoughts, extreme mental anguish/distress, and couldn't eat or sleep for 2 weeks minimum. I would do absolutely anything to get that drug. Hurt others, hurt myself, rip people off, lie, steal, cheat, you name it -- when you have an addiction as powerful as opiates, it does not matter what is in the way of that drug. It took me about a dozen times in detox before I would even go into a program to try to permanently stay off. I hated everything about myself and didn't use for fun, the high, or anything other than to not get violently ill and to feel normal. But that's addiction, you do something every day that you no longer have a desire to do because it has become an overwhelming and overbearing need that takes precedence over any other human need known to man. I've been clean now with the help of Methadone Maintenance Treatment for over 9 months and I tell you, every day was harder than the last for the first 6 of those months.

Comparing the two just really is not fair, and IMO they say it on the commercials as a scare tactic.

 

[WolfeReign]

I had an addiction to ...... and other opiates for many years and I can tell you that quitting cigarettes was absolutely nothing likely quitting that. Not even in the same realm. It really is unfair to compare the two. When I didn't have drugs I would shake, sweat, puke, pins and needles all over my body, extreme pain in my bones and muscles, ........, suicidal thoughts, extreme mental anguish/distress, and couldn't eat or sleep for 2 weeks minimum. I would do absolutely anything to get that drug. Hurt others, hurt myself, rip people off, lie, steal, cheat, you name it -- when you have an addiction as powerful as opiates, it does not matter what is in the way of that drug. It took me about a dozen times in detox before I would even go into a program to try to permanently stay off. I hated everything about myself and didn't use for fun, the high, or anything other than to not get violently ill and to feel normal. But that's addiction, you do something every day that you no longer have a desire to do because it has become an overwhelming and overbearing need that takes precedence over any other human need known to man. I've been clean now with the help of Methadone Maintenance Treatment for over 9 months and I tell you, every day was harder than the last for the first 6 of those months.

Comparing the two just really is not fair, and IMO they say it on the commercials as a scare tactic.

First off Chelly i tip my hat to you good lady for what you had to go through and how long you have not been there....

.....Second i have to say that is part of the "hidden" ingredients in the cancer sticks, along with the rocket fuel, DTT ( compound they thought was safe in the 50's and used it everywhere then they found out how much trouble that was), cyanide facepalm Paint thinner confused and Jimmy Hoffa laugh

.....Third i can see both sides of the coin here, though i have to admit i can see the ex-smokers point of view clearer...it would be a matter of etiquette and less of a matter of "you are either with use, doing it -- or against us" attitude...or it is something i am just not getting and need to put down the pv and pick up the stink stix again

 

[Marthag]

There is a simple solution. Just hold the drag down for more than three seconds. Than most people don't ask if they do just look at them like "you newer seen an inhaler before" and tell them you have a medical condition. Oh and it helps if yore pv looks like an asthma enhailer.

 

[zapped]

ex-smokers can be the worst and one thing Ive promised myself is Im not going to be THAT guy who always complains loudly about cigarette smoke and the smell even though I really dont like it now.

As far as them complaining about the clouds of vapor at the table, its either one of two things: Jealousy or being worried that its gonna cause them to relapse