FREE FS eGo KIT! POST TO WIN. At least one winner every Tuesday
- Thread starter Randall Fox
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765 For the upcoming Drawing.
My name is Simon and I like to do Drawings. Ok, that's not really my name and I don't like to do drawings, but if you're not WoWed, then we're subject to a Drawing....so I guess I have to like them.
But puhlease....
I feel like my PV is a Taiwanese .........everyone at my work wants some. I'm scared I'm gonna catch something every time I vape afterwards. Please help this nonsense stop. I can load this puppy up and let all the smokers hit it up so they don't have to use my ..........i mean PV.
My name is Simon and I like to do Drawings. Ok, that's not really my name and I don't like to do drawings, but if you're not WoWed, then we're subject to a Drawing....so I guess I have to like them.
But puhlease....
I feel like my PV is a Taiwanese .........everyone at my work wants some. I'm scared I'm gonna catch something every time I vape afterwards. Please help this nonsense stop. I can load this puppy up and let all the smokers hit it up so they don't have to use my ..........i mean PV.
Thanks for considering me my # is the # of days without a cggie 272
A burglar broke into a house one night.
He shined his flashlight around,
looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said,
'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze.
When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.'
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.
Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you ?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed.
'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'
A burglar broke into a house one night.
He shined his flashlight around,
looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said,
'Jesus knows you're here.'
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze.
When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.
Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard 'Jesus is watching you.'
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.
Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
'Did you say that?' he hissed at the parrot.
'Yep', the parrot confessed, then squawked, 'I'm just trying to warn you that he is watching you.'
The burglar relaxed. 'Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you ?'
'Moses,' replied the bird.
'Moses?' the burglar laughed.
'What kind of people would name a bird Moses?'
'The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus.'
I love my riva, I know its a knock off of the ego, would like to have the real deal and compare. 333 is the number for me!
969 for next week and for everyone who needs a laugh on this Thursday:
Two friends were in a bar drinking a beer when one pulled out a cigar but he didn't have a lighter so he asked his friend if he had one..
"I sure do," he replied and reached into his pocket and pulled out a 10 inch Bic lighter.
"Wow!" said his friend, "where did you get that monster."
"I got it from my genie."
"You have a genie?" he asked.
"Yes, he's right here in my pocket."
"Could I see him?"
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a very small genie.
The friend says, "I'm a good friend of your master. Will you grant me one wish?"
"Yes I will," the genie said so he asks him for a million bucks and the genie hops back into his master's pocket and leaves the man standing there waiting for his million bucks.
About this time, a duck walks into the bar followed by another. Then more ducks come pouring in. Before long the entire bar has ducks everywhere. The friend tells his buddy, "What is going on here, I asked for a million bucks not ducks!"
He answers, "I forgot to tell you the genie is hard of hearing. Do you really think I asked him for a 10 inch Bic?"
Two friends were in a bar drinking a beer when one pulled out a cigar but he didn't have a lighter so he asked his friend if he had one..
"I sure do," he replied and reached into his pocket and pulled out a 10 inch Bic lighter.
"Wow!" said his friend, "where did you get that monster."
"I got it from my genie."
"You have a genie?" he asked.
"Yes, he's right here in my pocket."
"Could I see him?"
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a very small genie.
The friend says, "I'm a good friend of your master. Will you grant me one wish?"
"Yes I will," the genie said so he asks him for a million bucks and the genie hops back into his master's pocket and leaves the man standing there waiting for his million bucks.
About this time, a duck walks into the bar followed by another. Then more ducks come pouring in. Before long the entire bar has ducks everywhere. The friend tells his buddy, "What is going on here, I asked for a million bucks not ducks!"
He answers, "I forgot to tell you the genie is hard of hearing. Do you really think I asked him for a 10 inch Bic?"
Posting for next weeks drawing. Picking #905 as that is my husbands birthday and he is the best thing to ever happen to me.
Now for my story...
When I was 6 years old (on June 18, 1977, I think it was) my mom took me to see Elvis Presley at Kemper Arena in Kansas City, Missouri. The show started late because he had trouble getting into his jumpsuit, or at least that was what he said...lol. About half way thru the concert, which was awesome I might add, mom went up to the stage. (I stayed with the friend of hers that came with us) When the concert was over, she is forever in getting back to us. When she gets there, she has a piece of fabric. Elvis had taken her by the hand, kissed her and then lays the last scarf of the evening in her hand. Needless to say, with it being the last scarf, all the girls around her grabbed onto it. The security guard ended up having to cut between the hands and my mom got two handfuls of the scarf, which she has passed onto me, along with the ticket stubs and all the memorabilia that came along with that concert.
Now for my story...
When I was 6 years old (on June 18, 1977, I think it was) my mom took me to see Elvis Presley at Kemper Arena in Kansas City, Missouri. The show started late because he had trouble getting into his jumpsuit, or at least that was what he said...lol. About half way thru the concert, which was awesome I might add, mom went up to the stage. (I stayed with the friend of hers that came with us) When the concert was over, she is forever in getting back to us. When she gets there, she has a piece of fabric. Elvis had taken her by the hand, kissed her and then lays the last scarf of the evening in her hand. Needless to say, with it being the last scarf, all the girls around her grabbed onto it. The security guard ended up having to cut between the hands and my mom got two handfuls of the scarf, which she has passed onto me, along with the ticket stubs and all the memorabilia that came along with that concert.
563 Please !
and a laugh !
Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club are all aghast.
At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, 'Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?' Bob replies, 'Girlfriend? She's my wife!' They are knocked over, but continue to ask. 'So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?' 'I lied about my age', Bob replies.. 'What, did you tell her you were only 50?'
Bob smiles and says, 'No, I told her I was 90.'
and a laugh !
Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club are all aghast.
At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, 'Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?' Bob replies, 'Girlfriend? She's my wife!' They are knocked over, but continue to ask. 'So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?' 'I lied about my age', Bob replies.. 'What, did you tell her you were only 50?'
Bob smiles and says, 'No, I told her I was 90.'
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