Eating disorders have always been around (sorry, like, this is one of my areas of expertise) as have self injurers. They just got turned into saints and penned up in nunneries.
How a culture perceives beauty does have a great deal to do with eating disorders, and really things have only gone downhill. This is why I admire voluptuous actresses like Kate Winslow who was once on the cover of whatever that soft porn "men's magazine" is termed, I forget. They photoshopped her without her consent and she made them print a retraction that included the words, "I don't look like that. No women look like that. I have been photoshopped. It is not my intention to look like that, and whatever that chick's name was who starred in the hunger games and unapologetically beefed up (I mean, grew into her natural body shape) and had many profanity laden words about it when she got called onto the carpet.
Marilyn Monroe would be considered "fat" by society's standards today. She would be immediately told to lose 20 lbs and come back later (as was Jennifer Anniston when she showed up in Hollywood.)
This is in part the abundance/lack of abundance thing that sort of happens. Back in the day it was considered a sign of wealth to have enough food to be fat, so fat was prized. Now that any old person on food stamps can usually (although this is changing) obtain relatively cheap food, and cheap food is FOR THE MOST PART unhealthy, it's actually quite shocking the rate of actual food addiction in our poorer communities. It's comforting, it tastes "good" sorta and one can actually afford it. So "slim" then "thin" then etc., became the new normal and etc. Also, with time to exercise out of the picture, the "fitness model with the fabulous view as she walks away" is a cultural standard of beauty. Etc.
Speaking of that, it's gonna be day one of return to yoga, I dread it but if anything, it's the thing that's going to get me most prepared for work, endorphically and everything else. Plus, strong mind== strong body. If I can get an hour in somewhere over lunch 3 days a week and weekends, I can get and remain on my yoga game.
Eating dx are really about so many things: body dysmorphia (flip
@Uncle Willie 's mirror pic, and you'll get a good
sense of how anorexics and bulimics "look" to themselves, it's really sad.)
Often a person can sliiiide into an eating dx, they diet, they get positive feedback, they diet more, until "people start to worry." But by then it's too late.
And by then "control" has set in, not to mention co occurring disorders because guess what you are going to be depressed, anxious, and at times psychotic about food and body and all else, because your brain can NOT make the necessary chemicals that your brain needs, and etc., and even feeding an anorexic antidepressants doesn't do much if they don't have the building blocks for those chemicals to travel up to the brain and work.
This is why refeeding is so necessary. And, OMG is it painful to watch (or undertake as a clinical team). My unit, as part of my training had me sit and eat with the patients on the unit during the "therapeutic meal," which happened once a week and like think cheesecake and whatnot, and endless diversions to not eat. I have never been so grateful to get up from something and thing, "OH my God, thank God that I can AVOID my addictive substances, as an ED is also very addicting."
Imagine being an alcoholic and having to sit down and "drink normally" 3 times a day. Imagine having to gain 30 lbs to be considered "slender" and to be staring at a 300 lb woman in the mirror everyday.
EDs also have the highest mortality rate for any disorder. 10% PER year of the disorder. Whether it's suicide, a ruptured stomach from bulimia, Whatever... That was where my first client died on me, and I didn't handle it very well, let me put it this way.
But the body shaming and everything else that happens in our culture is pretty ungodly. I have to fight to keep the weight on these days, but at one point in my life, a med (that my doctor refused to treat the side effects of, caused me to gain about 80 lbs. I was by no means "obese," or even "stocky" but the husband once asked me why I only wore two pairs of pants, and I was like "Nothing fits."
And he was like, "Oh honey, we HAVE to get you clothes and you can't live like that," and I hated it because I knew I'd be buying size 6-8 clothing, but I'd never been more than a size 2 before that happened.
Now, I just try to avoid having to shop in the children's section, frankly but it's easier than dealing with that size 8 day even though frankly, I probably look best in a size 3 which is where I get to with yoga, because I'm adding muscle and eating more.
I kept those size 8 pants, and not because I am "afraid I might return," or anything like that. I keep them as a reminder that I have a husband who loved me enough to coax me through my own body image issues.
I have to say, I am THRILLED to see a woman who has SUPERIOR self esteem. I used to have it in my 18s, but a lot of stuff has happened to me since then, like a mom constantly dieting, an abortion, being on endless rounds of meds that messed with my metabolism, having all my teeth removed, etc. Gaining weight is frightening for me, mainly because it means I am out of my own control comfort level. Very few women in our society aren't uncomfortable about SOMETHING in their bodies, and it's quite quite complicated indeed.
But, I do remember that carefree approach to all things physical. I still have it, I love hiking, running jumping around like a mad fool but I also have to, sadly, remind myself SO OFTEN to be MINDFUL. Mindful that I am beautiful, inside and out, mindful that perfection is an ever moving target, and mindful that I be kind to all the women around me, whether they look like Jenny McCarthy or they look like Rosanne. Because it truly doesn't and shouldn't matter.
Those few years on the ED unit were among some of my hardest as a clinician.
Anna
