*New* Contest hosted by The Vapor Station: Best One Liner Joke

[eric]

Contest begins today 9/29/2016 4:00 PM CST.
Contest ends on 10/10/2016 at 11:59 PM CST.

The winner of this contest will win a Sir Lancelot 18650 mechanical battery mod, available in Copper, Black or White.

Rules:
1. Post as many one liner jokes as you'd like.
2. The best one liner joke will be chosen by yours truly on October 10, 2016.
3. Tell your friends, family, and co-workers about The Vapor Station (www.vaporstation.com)
4. Spread info about the contest in appropriate hot spots on ECF forum.
5. That's all!

Feel free to post any joke you'd like in this thread, but only one liners will be considered when determining the winner.

Let's get this show on the road!

 

[eric]

Contest is live. Good luck, everyone!

 

[eric]

Be sure to check out our current BOGO promotion thread: BOGO Sale on 30ml bottles of Berry Mint, Strawberry, Chocolate, and Grape at The Vapor Station.

 

[redrebel821]

I'm great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

 

[eric]

In honor of the King of the One Liner, Mitch Hedberg:

 

[redrebel821]

 

[somdcomputerguy]

This termite walks into a bar and asks, "Where's the bartender?"

 

[eric]

We're off to a good start, folks.

 

[somdcomputerguy]

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

 

[Foggy Road]

If i had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me irresistibly attractive.

 

[Mowgli]

A dyslexic walked into a bra...

 

[sonicbomb]

David Blaine only gives the illusion he's a magician,

 

[4lph4num3r1c]

Not an entry

I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
Groucho Marx

 

[4lph4num3r1c]

Not an entry

My partner - he's got a nose just like a bloodhound ... and the rest of his face don't look so good either.
Chico Marx

 

[4lph4num3r1c]

Not an entry

.......
Harpo Marx

 

[bsidb]

If turkey invades your A.$, do you think grease would help?

 

[Foggy Road]

I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

 

[Foggy Road]

I could tell my parents hated me, my bath toys were a toaster and a radio

 

[Foggy Road]

I'm on a whiskey diet, I've lost three days already.

 

[Foggy Road]

A local restaurateur had absolutely no knowledge of Vapegeddon until he was arrested and jailed by the FDA for serving mashed tobaccoes and gravy without submitting a PMTA.