Talking with a smoker...

[tr1age]

I just wanted to write about some of the conversations I have had with people about e-cigarettes in the last few days. As any e-smoker knows, when you go on your smoke breaks with one of these things you get asked a lot of questions.


I have had some of the most down to earth sincere conversations with people over the last few days about smoking. It has really been moving. What a smoker will never admit to a non smoker or someone who says,”HEY you need to QUIT!” “You know you’re killing yourself, right?!?!” is why yes yes I am. We get ...... and it makes us want to smoke more because deep down inside we know exactly what we are doing. We are also dreading the doctor visits for simple checkups because of the WHAT IF and CANCER word, causing some to miss normal checkups all together. All in all it is denial but most of all it is us loving the aspect so smoking soo much, being social, our mind giving us a break from work, brain storming, some cases weight loss, and so on. How many times have you been a part of an important meeting ona smoke break? I know I have. There are things like that in life that make quitting even harder, especially if you enjoy it. What we feel inside is so conflicting it is impossible to answer those who approach us in any other way than for us to joke as a dismissal or to get angry.

This is where my conversations have differed. When anyone sees that there is another option out there to keep their lifestyle they have grown to love, be it feeding the nicotine addiction or just having the social aspect, if you ask them, “You hate the fact that regular cigarettes are eventually going to kill you” They will look you in the eyes and agree. Not only that but there is such truth in the statement and understanding, it is really moving. I have been very fervent about the entire idea of e-smoking because honestly I have wondered SINCE I BEGAN SMOKING, why oh why can’t there be a healthy alternative, I really enjoy this. I mean come on, smoking is a past time that really just feels right for some of us. I mean look at an old 50’s picture, everyone is smoking. Look at the old ads! They didn’t know any better and so they enjoyed smoking and it was part of the culture. When we found out it was bad it was too late to turn back and the culture pushed on, even past all of the negative aspects. People look down on smokers because they are killing themselves, HOW COULD THEY! They say we smell, they say it sucks to kiss us, they move us into corners of buildings away from other people even though they don’t realize we have our own community wherever they put us. We often feel exiled or as if we may jeopardize more than our health but our jobs as well being smokers.


So now that I can tell my story with the e-cigarettes to all my friends who smoke with me, they look at what is in my hand, confused but hopeful. And I swear if there was theme music or I could jump into the inner psychie of one of them when they hear there is a healthier alternative to smoking without having to stop the routine I would start crying. Or how about the idea that you could technically smoke indoors so if you NEED to be somewhere but can’t concentrate without that smoke, do it right there, take a few drags, or hit the bathroom and grab a few puffs in there to last you.


Now don’t get me wrong being that e-cigs are still under question this may not be the answer yet, but just from a surface point of view it is a damn good step in the right direction.


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This article is from my website esmoking101.com.

 

[Mark_T]

A moving post, and pretty much explains how I felt when i learned about e-cigs

 

[LaceyUnderall]

Kitty - great post. I feel just as you do...

 

[Cuando]

Nice post, Kitty, I've run across a lot of the same openness.

I get the "hrrrmmm, China?" response pretty often, but people are definitely intrigued. I like to hand out business cards for the various vendors I've used so far, but really, they need to send more than two or three cards, I've gone through mine already.

I do have to say that I'm getting more and more used to vaping, and I do sort of feel like a born-again smoker in a way, as I'm constantly talking about e-cigs since I got turned onto them, and I'm constantly browsing the internet for info/reviews/etc.. I do plan on quitting entirely, but I have to say I'm very thankful for these crazy little gadgets at the moment. I have a higher self-esteem from simply not smelling like cigarettes, not to mention being able to breathe so much better.

 

[BlueSun]

Great post!

Tonight I walked past the local bar while I was puffing away on on eCigar, and, as usual, there were some smokers outside puffing away in -12C weather. I stopped in front of the three of them and said, "Hey, you guys don't have to smoke outside. You should try one of these." So, I puffed on my cigar and watched their reaction. One lady said to me, "Yeah right, that's a fake cigar!" I explained to them the technology behind e-cigs and then took some more puffs to show them that it wasn't just my breath in the cold air but actual vapour from the device. They asked if their was nicotine in it, and I said yes. They seemed very intrigued.

I gave them the link to ePuffer and told them to google search this forum. They asked me a couple of times for the links, too. I then walked away, feeling like an e-cig evangelist.

Next mission: My brothers (who thought the idea sounded silly when I told them about it), and my neighbours (when they come out in the spring!).

 

[LaceyUnderall]

I get the "hrrrmmm, China?" response pretty often,

I get that too... but at least I can always use the defense that in the US, the peanut butter supply, which we feed our entire population, is killing us. It isn't just the Chinese who cut corners. It is bad people doing bad things and it can happen anywhere.

 

[surbitonPete]

Yes a great post Kitty.

vaping has made me feel like a drowning man who has been thrown a life-belt.

 

[wv2win]

Good post, Kitty and good replies. I feel the same way about smoking. If you are not addicted there is no way you can understand just how hard it is to quit. It does cut into your self esteem. I'm anxiously awaiting my starter kit (901). I'm already talking to a few friends about e-cigs and so far have only tried one at a kiosk at the local mall. My friends are all happy for me to be the "guinea-pig". I also have questions about the fact that they are only manufactured in China. I hope they spread across the globe and eventually are made and excepted everywhere. I was surprised to see that you can buy one brand ( I think NJoy) on Amazon.com.

 

[Vince1]

Hi Kitty, I seem to get some unexpected responses. The people at work who don't smoke think it's great that I have found something that isn't full of tar and such with no second hand smoke and smell to bother others, while the ones who smoke respond with "what's the point if you ain't quit" ........ Strange.

 

[Spikey]

I always stop when I see a bunch of people outside a bar and give a quick demo, a pursmoker.com card with this forum address on the back and tell them to enjoy freezing while I go inside to vape I am very outgoing, but never have much time to be social because I am usually with a group of people.

 

[Alain59]

Yes a really Great Post there Kitty ! And so True............

 

[Momof3]

I mostly get nothing but negativity from both sides. Why are we ex-smokers or smokers? I've never heard of an ex-alcoholic. The worst for me is "Just 2 weeks without and your addiction to cigarettes will be gone." Sorry, but after almost a year without, the 1st thing I wanted after my DS was born was a cigarette. Maybe someday I'll be a recovering smoker, but never an ex.

Stupidest IMO is "It's really easy to quit, just don't buy them." I got that once from someone I knew had lifelong weight issues. My response "Why don't you lose 50 pounds? It's really easy. Eat less, exercise more." She's more understanding now.

My only real supporters at this point are children. Mine, nieces and nephews and my kids friends whose parents smoke.

 

[LaceyUnderall]

I mostly get nothing but negativity from both sides. Why are we ex-smokers or smokers? I've never heard of an ex-alcoholic. The worst for me is "Just 2 weeks without and your addiction to cigarettes will be gone." Sorry, but after almost a year without, the 1st thing I wanted after my DS was born was a cigarette. Maybe someday I'll be a recovering smoker, but never an ex.

Stupidest IMO is "It's really easy to quit, just don't buy them." I got that once from someone I knew had lifelong weight issues. My response "Why don't you lose 50 pounds? It's really easy. Eat less, exercise more." She's more understanding now.

My only real supporters at this point are children. Mine, nieces and nephews and my kids friends whose parents smoke.

Agree with this completely.

And...

you have all of us... who go through the same fight everyday. Yes... my e-cig makes my non-tobacco use extremely bearable... but it isn't a cigarette. Today after a nice big lunch, I thought how nice just one tobacco cig would be. (Then I remember that last week I had one and had to lay on the floor from a personal summer and head rush.)

Once a smoker, always a smoker.

 

[Monie]

I mostly get nothing but negativity from both sides. Why are we ex-smokers or smokers? I've never heard of an ex-alcoholic. The worst for me is "Just 2 weeks without and your addiction to cigarettes will be gone." Sorry, but after almost a year without, the 1st thing I wanted after my DS was born was a cigarette. Maybe someday I'll be a recovering smoker, but never an ex.

Stupidest IMO is "It's really easy to quit, just don't buy them." I got that once from someone I knew had lifelong weight issues. My response "Why don't you lose 50 pounds? It's really easy. Eat less, exercise more." She's more understanding now.

My only real supporters at this point are children. Mine, nieces and nephews and my kids friends whose parents smoke.

Momof3, you have my support. My dad quit cold turkey in his early twenties. I'm 38. I've never smoked in front of my parents out of respect for them, but they know I smoked. I told my mom I'm trying to quit using an e-cig and explained it to her. She thought it was silly at first, but after about a week, when she asked for an update and I told her it was still working for me, she's really impressed and has even told some of her friends about it. She's never been a smoker. On the other hand, my dad has since pipped in, and honestly, I am sure he thinks he's being helpful, but his advice was telling me "I just told myself I was bigger than that cig". I just said ya, I know....but that's been the most insulting comment to me. I mean, if I really wanted to pick him appart and have the argument (which I would never do out of respect for my folks), I could..... I'm bigger than a bullet, but telling myself that isn't going to protect me from one, ya know?

Anyway, I just wanted to give you my support and to let you know I'm going through the same and can completely understand. Just let the insults go. That's what I'm going to try to do. No one is perfect, but the fact that you and I are actually taking action to try to make improvements to ourselves is better than most can say.

 

[Momof3]

Thanks so much for the support. I have no illusions about e-cigs being a magical stop smoking device. At least not for me. My goal at this point is stepping down to the 0 nic. I'm on the med now and while I think I honestly smoke more now when I'm vaping, it does keep the edge off. It is a daily struggle.

I have 2 family members I'd like for it to help. My penstyle is not going to do it for them, so I'm trying the pilot. We're surrounded with militant non-smokers. Despite having taken it outside years ago, we still get nothing but crap.

My GM is 80 yrs old. She started smoking at 17. When I think of her out in the cold only to come inside to not "Thank you for being so considerate.", but to nasty "You stink. You just need to quit. Don't you know you're killing yourself." I just want to smack someone. KWIM

I think she's starting to have some hope that I'll find something right for her too, but she's afraid to get her hopes up too high. Despite the negativity, I'm still working on the rest of the family for at least some tolerance and understanding. I've been pointing out that the only thing they've ever accomplished with the shaming or fear tactics is us hiding it from them. Which then made time together shorter, more strained and less frequent.

My kids and I have talked about addictions. Hard not to when they come home from school bawling that Mom does drugs and is going to die. DS said "So it's kind of like me and the Playstation?" LOL I said "Yeah, but even worse." It never ceases to amaze me how much more understanding kids are than most adults.

 

[surbitonPete]

Momof3: quote: ( My GM is 80 yrs old. She started smoking at 17. When I think of her out in the cold only to come inside to not "Thank you for being so considerate.", but to nasty "You stink. You just need to quit. Don't you know you're killing yourself." I just want to smack someone. KWIM)

Oh how I understand how you feel....I hardly ever talk with my sister any more because she is a psychotic anti-smoker.....we cannot possibly have 'any' conversation without her bringing it up and saying something about stink or health. She never ever stopped nagging our mum about smoking and yet she lived well into her 80 and died of something that had nothing to do with smoking.

 

[Momof3]

Oh how I understand how you feel....I hardly ever talk with my sister any more because she is a psychotic anti-smoker.....we cannot possibly have 'any' conversation without her bringing it up and saying something about stink or health.

Got one of those too. She gives cancer patients their radiation treatments, so I understand where she's coming from, I just wish it went both ways. Until our trip, she thought I quit about 3yrs ago. Nope, just avoided her and hid it. I wish she would get off her soapbox and at least listen about the e-cigs. She gripes about her patients that are still smoking. I think many of them would consider e-cigs the greatest things since sliced bread.

 

[OutWest]

Stupidest IMO is "It's really easy to quit, just don't buy them." I got that once from someone I knew had lifelong weight issues. My response "Why don't you lose 50 pounds? It's really easy. Eat less, exercise more." She's more understanding now.

I hear ya on all your points. I had a coworker give me the "why dont you just quit?" lecture one day and I said a very similar thing to her about "why dont you just lose weight?". Needless to say, she shut up about the smoking thing.

regarding your GM - when they give her crap when she comes back in from a smoke, she ought to just one day tell 'em to go f*** themselves. That'd prolly not only stun 'em to hear that sort of thing from GM, but also might make 'em shut up *heh*

 

[Momof3]

I've told her to do that many times, especially when she was just hiding her smoking. Minus the F*** though. Don't think I could even use that word in front of her. LOL

When she was hiding it she reminded me of my teen years. Sad, but funny at times too. "Quick, quick, cover for me." I kept telling her "Your their mom, not the other way around!"

 

[jamie]

She gives cancer patients their radiation treatments...She gripes about her patients that are still smoking.

I wish folks like that would just get out of cancer treatment all together. My eyes were opened to this issue when I spent some time reading a forum for cancer patients/family. Many of the never-smokers finally felt the anti-culture hostility coming their way with the assumptions by medical personnel that they were smokers and most by far fully recoiled and found it unbearably cruel. Also very sad were tales of folks, both smokers and non, who were near death and still being browbeaten or given smoking cessation materials, even printed on their cancer treatment and medication handouts "courtesy" of ACS. Some very sad stories there and lots of patient and family resentments towards medical staff about their judgemental attitudes; whether they think it shows or not it clearly does.