Hi Davcav, I feel your frustration. Here's my long story - hope it inspires you!
1st, I really like smoking. Only reasons to quit are because other peeps (fiance, mostly) don't like the smell, really pricey (about $200USD/month), and the health problems that will come down the road. I breathe fine, and don't have a cough, but I know if wait a few more years, it'll happen. So, I basically only wanted to quit for all those superficial reasons, as I said, I still LIKE smoking, as crazy/dumb as it it may be!
So a year ago I tried to quit. I had the same reasoning as you, and really wanted to try and duplicate the smoking experience, and got a V2 cig-alike kit. No button to push, the same size (but heavier) than a real cig, and disposable tobacco cartridges. I ended up thinking all the tobacco flavors tasted like unlit cigarettes, not bad, but definitely not smoking! And it didn't feel like a cigarette in my hands or mouth. I was still smoking like a chimney, this was NOT working.
Then my friend lent me her Egos w/ Evod tanks, with some fruity juices. I liked these much better, and began to make the most important mental switch - vaping isn't anything like smoking, and to succeed, I had to stop trying to make it be something it isn't. Hard to explain, but once I made that mental switch, things got lots easier. So last winter, I used my friend's Vamo, and liked it even better than the Egos, so I decided to really make an effort, bought the Vamo, and got down from 35 cigs/day to 4 cigs/day easily. I took a no pressure approach: every time I wanted to smoke, I would vape 1st. If I still wanted to smoke in 5 minutes, I would, no guilt. It was amazing! I just forgot that I wanted to smoke after I vaped for a minute!
Then spring came - I always smoked outside, so going outside is a huge trigger for me. Then with gardening, my hands were all dirty, and I didn't want to touch my nice e cig, so I'd grab a smoke. Long story short, I was back to 35 cigs/day within a few weeks

Felt terrible about myself, but decided to give up until I came in for the winter again.
Winter came, and I found myself getting really frustrated with trying vaping again. Not nearly as succesful as last year

My cigarettes are so dependable, they work every time. These dang tanks kept clogging so I couldn't get a hit, and I'd end up reaching for a smoke. I finally found some cheap tanks that didn't clog on me, and learned to always have a spare one filled and ready, so that if one does clog, I can just switch and not get all mad, thank golly, and that's when I decided that the only way I was going to stop going for the cigarettes was to not have any in the house. So I ran out. For the 1st time in 20 years, I had no cigarettes in my house. Scary! It was rough for the 1st 3 days, but only mentally, 'cuz I carried that Vamo like a pacifier, so I didn't have any nicotine craving.
I recently upgraded to an eleaf istick 30w and an Aspire Atlantis tank. Got both for $65USD. I never have to "mess" with this setup at all, just fill and vape 'til the tanks empty, which with heavy vaping takes most of the day. Absolutely no leaking, no wiping, no tissues! The battery is really small, I'm a 5'2" 100# gal, and I can hide it in my hand, with just the tank showing.
All told, from beginning to end, including umpteen flavors of juice to try (sounds like you're ahead of me in that department

, I've probably spent about $500. I still want to smoke, and miss it, but sure don't miss the ashtrays and smell! I'm sure I could start smoking again no prob if I couldn't vape, so I seem to be a bit unusual in this forum in that regard - I tried one a few days ago and had to put it out because I was liking it!
I'm sorry you've already dumped so much $ in and are so frustrated! Please look through these forums, they've helped me find the right stuff to use, as well as the inspiration to keep trying! Keep up the good work!