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That does make sense. He just thinks he can build stuff and he can't and I hate to break his heart. But this is too important, the focal point of the whole kitchen. I do think he will think more on it and come around. Playing the weak simpering miss does not work, he knows me too well and I am not good at it. lol
Both of us have had a difficult year with deaths and babies and now this. We are both stressed out and I think we are both a little touchy. Plus a huge, unplanned for project that will entail more money out of our pockets (you know insurance will not cover it all) is just one more blow to add to a bad year.
It would just be a shame to have to do this partial kitchen remodel and not have it done right, especially since we are thinking of downsizing in the next few years. I am trying to get him to see this, gently. But obviously, not tactfully.
I was never real good at the manipulation stuff. I am too straightforward. Most women would get whatever they want out of this by whatever means. I am not good at that.
Both of us have had a difficult year with deaths and babies and now this. We are both stressed out and I think we are both a little touchy. Plus a huge, unplanned for project that will entail more money out of our pockets (you know insurance will not cover it all) is just one more blow to add to a bad year.
It would just be a shame to have to do this partial kitchen remodel and not have it done right, especially since we are thinking of downsizing in the next few years. I am trying to get him to see this, gently. But obviously, not tactfully.
I was never real good at the manipulation stuff. I am too straightforward. Most women would get whatever they want out of this by whatever means. I am not good at that.
Oh no, Karen. That is terrible. But hopefully they will fix him up and he will be feeling much better. I am sorry.
It was in Northeast, I think -- near the Blue Plains treatment plant, I think the name of it was? But when I look up Blue Plains, it's in SW. I had really thought it was White Plains, but ... nm. Has been about 25 yrs+.
I worked as a private investigator in DC-Md-Va area too, later. Had to try to go serve papers in that same neighborhood. Got that same police officer to come with me. Really helped! (me to feel better!) People didn't want to talk to me. This is all in the late 70s, early 80s. I should have asked him to sing as we walked up to the door where I needed to go. That same cop was a Lieutenant supervising the scene when the plane crashed into the 14th street bridge in 1982, remember that?
The name of the little bar, was something like the SeaShell. Or something. It was a DIVE!
You got a death wish for me or sumptin. You do not do crap like that to a man unless you both are in Marine boot camp.
Shari shave off all his pubic hair while he's sleeping. Tell him next time you'll wear a blindfold and use a straight razor.
Ahh Karen, cheers to you for helping your friend. Glad that you were there to advocate for him, and glad that he was admitted! Sometimes that's 9/10 the battle, right? Hospitals kind of like to just send people home sometimes. GOOD FOR YOU!
GOOD ! ! ! AND - That in itself is probably why the MAN loves "You" . . . Just Sayin' . . .
NOW - BE Just As LOVING - AND, I agree with "mdw" - be honest . . . .ALSO - As Direct & Straightforward as "You" say you are too . . . Let him know that while he shocked the
out of "You" - and you are sorry for the way "You" reacted . . . But - That "You" really want this to be as easy as possible on both of "YOU" and NEED it to be done by a professional so that YOU BOTH can come out of the situation as unscathed as possible too . . .Just a suggestion . . .
I celebrated my 5 month anniversary a few hous ago with a full blown panic attack. For a couple of days I had had charley horses in my calf, so I increased my water intake and they went away. Yesterday the calf muscle was sore and again today but nothing I would call real pain, just tender, after sitting watching tv for several hours I realized I had a red mark on my leg and it was warm and I panicked. Stupid me forgot I had been sitting with that leg curled under me and the other leg laying across it, right on the warm red spot. Duh how crazy am I becoming?
You are not crazy. That is scary. I find the older I get the more I notice when my body decides to protest something I do or do not do. When I am doing a lot of sitting, which is quite often, I try to make it a habit to get up and walk around every half hour or so. Just to keep the old blood moving.
I thought I had a stroke last March, whole left side of my face and arm went numb. Scared the wits out of me, but no insurance so I just laid on the couch all night and tried to sleep. Felt a bit better after a day or so. Doctor said it was probably a very bad migraine. I just did not get the same pain I usually do.
It is really easy to psyche yourself out. Poor Claudia. It is really scary. I am so happy to hear that it was nothing to worry about. I hate getting old and having to worry about things like this. I think we old people would make much better use of some of those nice bodies I see on some of the young ones out there. So incorrect to think like that though.
I thought I had a stroke last March, whole left side of my face and arm went numb. Scared the wits out of me, but no insurance so I just laid on the couch all night and tried to sleep. Felt a bit better after a day or so. Doctor said it was probably a very bad migraine. I just did not get the same pain I usually do.
It is really easy to psyche yourself out. Poor Claudia. It is really scary. I am so happy to hear that it was nothing to worry about. I hate getting old and having to worry about things like this. I think we old people would make much better use of some of those nice bodies I see on some of the young ones out there. So incorrect to think like that though.
Shari.........tell him fine......you will help him build it. Building anything can't be that difficult........men have been doing it for years.
I knew If I went, it would finally be dealt with. I can't stand to see anyone n pain. He has nothing. NO real home. No belongings. Just him and a dog. I let him live at another of my brothers family members house for months for free. He had to pay the electric. He left there because there is no A/C for his dog. He moved back now that it is cooler. This is why he comes to clean the house. He refuses to take no for an answer, so I try to make it as easy as possible. I got him food stamps, he didn't know he was entitled to them. He had been asking me for food all the time, so I finally figured out he didn't have any. I just did the app for him, it takes just a few minutes.
He was so sad when I left the hospital, my nephew's girlfriend is taking me there tomorrow to talk to a neurologist that is trying to help him. Dog is here at my house, she's so old, she can barely move these days. My boys love her so its all good. I don't know if they will find a surgeon willing to do the surgery but at least they see how sick he is, last time he went they labeled him a druggie, it made me really mad. It's on his medical records and they won't remove it. He didn't care what they gave him just asked for something for pain. If you saw his neck and how his arms and legs get swollen from pain you would know how bad it was. I saw it and was terrified. He always did heavy labor kinds of jobs, so he isn't able to work anymore, now when he can he cleans people's homes, or does lawn work.
I even got him a bed from Craigslist, I put an ad on for a free bed, got him a beautiful queen set that was clean and fairly new.
If you know one person that is worse off than you, you have to try to help them. If everybody did that, we'd all be better off in my opinion.
My roommate helps me and I help him and his kids, I am helping this friend and so on....
I worked as a private investigator in DC-Md-Va area too, later. Had to try to go serve papers in that same neighborhood. Got that same police officer to come with me. Really helped! (me to feel better!) People didn't want to talk to me. This is all in the late 70s, early 80s. I should have asked him to sing as we walked up to the door where I needed to go. That same cop was a Lieutenant supervising the scene when the plane crashed into the 14th street bridge in 1982, remember that?
The name of the little bar, was something like the SeaShell. Or something. It was a DIVE![/QUOTE]
I remember that plane crash, I didn't live in DC, my roommate did, he tells me stories of how it was when he grew up there till he left. He worked on 14th in a strip club as the manager, he took girls off the street and had them work there instead. The cops brought them in to him to keep them from being abused on the street. He was only 21 at the time and helped straighten out a few, taught them to save money and not get involved with the customers and to get GED's. He actually has some that keep in contact with him on Facebook, it's funny, they are all educated now with good careers, he was saving people at an early age. He may be crazy now, but I knew him before his accident and he always liked to help people. He really is how I learned to be the way I am now. In many ways he taught me to be a more compassionate person, a lot nicer.
He made me realize it was ok to talk to the homeless man at the bustop, give him cigarettes, and that everyone has a story.
The name of the little bar, was something like the SeaShell. Or something. It was a DIVE![/QUOTE]
I remember that plane crash, I didn't live in DC, my roommate did, he tells me stories of how it was when he grew up there till he left. He worked on 14th in a strip club as the manager, he took girls off the street and had them work there instead. The cops brought them in to him to keep them from being abused on the street. He was only 21 at the time and helped straighten out a few, taught them to save money and not get involved with the customers and to get GED's. He actually has some that keep in contact with him on Facebook, it's funny, they are all educated now with good careers, he was saving people at an early age. He may be crazy now, but I knew him before his accident and he always liked to help people. He really is how I learned to be the way I am now. In many ways he taught me to be a more compassionate person, a lot nicer.
He made me realize it was ok to talk to the homeless man at the bustop, give him cigarettes, and that everyone has a story.
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