A Blonde Walks Into Cignu....

[Martyson]

[FONT="]Cignu.com is now open and we would like to say a big fat[FONT=Impact] [SIZE=7][COLOR=seagreen]"Hello"[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] to The ECF Community.[/FONT][/COLOR][/SIZE]


[SIZE=5][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]Cignu is family owned & operated, located in Gulf Shores, Alabama and currently ships to US locations only.[/FONT]

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Our store offers FREE USPS Ground Shipping* on all orders and FREE Priority Shipping on orders over $50. All users have the option of upgrading to priority in the shopping cart.
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[/SIZE] [SIZE=5]
[/SIZE][SIZE=5][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]Our goal is to offer Great Customer Service, Quality Products, Affordable Prices and Quick Shipping. Cignu is our full-time job and we will do our best to answer all requests a.s.a.p.!

To contact us:[/FONT]
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contact@cignu.com
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[/SIZE] [SIZE=5][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]Being that we are blonde and proud, a good dumb blonde joke is always appreciated. I am including an old favorite and welcome anyone else to do the same. We can all use a good laugh.[/FONT]

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[/SIZE] [SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde[/FONT][/COLOR][FONT="] neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=5]

[/SIZE] [SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. [/FONT]

[FONT="]A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE]


[SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]
[/FONT][FONT="]As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR]
[/SIZE] [SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen]
[/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”
[/FONT]
[FONT="]To which she replied, “There certainly is!”[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR]
[/SIZE] [SIZE=5][COLOR=darkgreen][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]
My stupid computer keeps saying,[/FONT]

[FONT="]“You’ve got mail!"[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR]
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[/SIZE] [SIZE=6][COLOR=#17365D][FONT="]I look forward to your responses and Blonde Jokes! Thank You....Marty

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[Martyson]

Joke-Of-The-Day

A blonde walks into the doctor's office. She gets in the room with the doctor and says, "Doc, I hurt all over." The doctor is perplexed. He says, "What do you mean, you hurt all over?" The blonde says, "I'll show you."

She then touches herself on the leg. "Ow!!! I hurt there."
Then she touches her earlobe. "Ow!!!! I hurt there too!"
Then she touches her hair. "Ow!!!! EVEN MY HAIR HURTS!"
So the doctor sits back and thinks on it for a few minutes.
Then he says, "Tell me, is blonde your natural hair color?"
The blonde says "Yes, why?"


The doctor says, "Well, you've got a broken finger..."

I would love to hear some of your Blonde jokes, feel free to post them on this thread.

ECF members get an additional 10% discount with this code-ECF10


*No blondes were injured in the making of this post.


Joke provided by--lotsofjokes dot com

 

[Martyson]

A broke blonde decides to ask God for help. “Dear Lord,” she prays, “If I don’t get some cash, I’m gonna lose everything. Please let me win the lottery.”

Lottery night comes, but the blonde doesn’t win. She prays even harder, saying, “God, why have you forsaken me? My children are starving. Please just let me win this once.”


Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light, and the blonde hears God speak.


“Sweetheart, work with me on this,” he says.


“buy a ticket.”



Save 10% on your next Cignu purchase - "ECF10"

* No blondes were injured in the making of this post.

 

[CES]

Heya Martyson!

During her company's periodic password audit, a blond employee was found to be using this password:
GoofyHueyLouieDeweyDaisyDonaldMickeyMinniePhoenix
When she was asked why she had such a long password, she said, "The boss said that my password had to be at least eight characters long and have at least one capital."

 

[Martyson]

Heya Martyson!

During her company's periodic password audit, a blond employee was found to be using this password:
GoofyHueyLouieDeweyDaisyDonaldMickeyMinniePhoenix
When she was asked why she had such a long password, she said, "The boss said that my password had to be at least eight characters long and have at least one capital."

I love a good blonde joke....

 

[Loveridden]

LOL nice jokes!! The one about the broken finger reminds me of a House episode...hehe

LOVE the shipping idea! I checked out your site and see you don't have a lot on there right now, I am assuming more will be added?

 

[Martyson]

Loveridden....I saw the House episode also. I love HOUSE!

We will be adding items and suggestions are very welcome.

 

[spacekitty]

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a Tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a Tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then ..."



He sighed........




"Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the box......."

 

[spacekitty]

I like that you have a link to CASAA on your site...

 

[Martyson]

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a Tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a Tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then ..."



He sighed........




"Let's put all the Frosted Flakes back in the box......."

I laughed so loud my cats left the room......Thanks, Spacekitty!

 

[Martyson]

There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.


The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"


Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. Then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"


Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00


The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"


Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.


Use Code "ECF10" for an extra 10% off at Cignu.com

We would love to hear more of your favorites, everyone needs a good laugh.

*No blondes were injured in the making of this post.

Joke provided by coolblondejokes dot com

 

[Martyson]

An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde flight attendant. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.


The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new flight attendant was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"


The flight attendant replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed,

"one is the bathroom,

one is the closet,

and one has a sign on it that says


'Do Not Disturb'!"


Use Code "ECF10" for an extra 10% off at Cignu.com


We would love to hear more of your favorites, everyone needs a good laugh.

*No blondes were injured in the making of this post.

Joke provided by funny-games dot biz

 

[Martyson]

Two blonds are on the beach at night looking up at the moon.


The first blonde asked the other one a question, "Which do you think is further? Florida, or the moon?"


The second blonde replies...



Hellllo!! you cant see Florida from here!



Use Code "ECF10" for an extra 10% off at Cignu.com



We would love to hear more of your favorites, everyone needs a good laugh.



*No blondes were injured in the making of this post.

 

[Martyson]

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.

“And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute. “Well,


Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.

Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.

Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.
But what does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes is silent for a moment.





“Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”


Check out our great shipping and products, use this code "ECF10" for an additional 10% savings.

 

[Martyson]

A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.

"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat the procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."

When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds.

"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you follow my instructions?"

The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day." "From hunger, you mean?" said the doctor.

"No, from skipping," replied the blonde.


Look for our upcoming giveaway!!!


Use code "ECF10" for an additional 10% discount @ Cignu Electronic Cigarettes Alabama

 

[Martyson]

It is 2012 and we are ready to start the New Year off with a few laughs and a give away!!!


Check out our Contest on the following thread: http://www.e-cigarette-forum.com/fo...s-contest-time-make-us-laugh.html#post4938046

 

[spacekitty]

Not a blonde joke... but it's enough to bump this thread with!!


There was a knock on the door this past Saturday
morning.

I opened it to find a young, well-dressed man standing there who said:

"Hello ma'am, I'm a Jehovah's Witness."

So I said "Come in and sit down."

I offered him a fresh cup of coffee and
asked "What do you want to talk about?"

"Beats the out of me, nobody ever let me in before."


(somehow, I think I missed your contest... been having computer probs)

 

[Martyson]

Thanks Spacekitty, love the funnies. There will be another contest soon.

 

[spacekitty]

Just wanted to stop by and say

(plus I was looking for a copy of one of my old jokes... lol)

 

[spacekitty]

I noticed on your website that it said:

"We are no longer accepting online sales."

What happened??