Guilty Vaping?

[AXIOM_1]

I have a rather "strange" emotional conflict I would like to vent about or get someone's thoughts on... At times I feel very guilty vaping, to the point that it is very disturbing for me.

I smoked for 35+ years (heavily) and more than 5 years ago I was finally able to quit the nasty things. The only problem was that I was only able to quit by substituting one demon for another while still being able to have nicotine. In other words, I was able to quit smoking with the use of chewing tobacco. There is no way in hades I could have quit smoking if it were not for chewing tobacco. People used to tell me that chewing tobacco was not a safe alternative and the way I viewed it at the time was that I figured that at least I wasn't doing any additional damage to my lungs. At least they would get a rest if I quit smoking so to speak. I also was fully aware that I was still just as addicted to tobacco as I always was it's just that I found an alternative delivery system in an attempt to save my lungs.

Needless to say, chewing has many drawbacks as well and it is a fairly "gross" habit, at least according to my wife I am such a nicotine junky that unlike most folks that chewed most people never knew I chewed because I always swallowed and never did anything gross like spit in front of people.

Anyway, I started finding myself CONSTANTLY chewing and I always had chew in my mouth. About the only time I never had chew in my mouth was while eating, if you can believe that..... The thing is that in the years I was chewing, my worries about lung diseases stopped and I was feeling pretty good about having quit smoking. My lung function was improved and everything seemed peachy...... However, I then started to worry about oral cancer and other problems. So, I found myself wishing I could quit chewing just as bad as I used to wish that I could quit smoking.

Then, I discovered e-cigs and thought they may help me quit chewing (which they did)..... I was able to stop chewing by vaping............. However, I have lately had this weird (or maybe not so weird) bit of guilt creeping in about vaping because in my mind it almost seems like I have started smoking again (because vaping feels like smoking)........... Even though I had quit smoking by aid of chewing tobacco I none the less was VERY HAPPY about finally being able to stop smoking after nearly 40 years of being chained to them and saving my lungs..... But now, here I am again pumping things back into my lungs. Yes, I know it's not smoke but still, I am putting things back into my lungs that I didn't have to do for the years while I was chewing.

Maybe you don't know what I am trying to get at and it's difficult to explain for sure.... Since vaping is just like smoking to me, then I feel guilty about smoking (vaping) again. Does any of this make any sense to any of you?

 

[MoDmAnDaN]

It actually makes perfect sense.

All I can say is don't feel guilty about it. It's not smoking and it's SOOOOO much better for you. Plus, I look at it this way; if chewing is gross (which I agree it is, and I used to chew myself). Your wife will truly appreciate it and might even like the smell compared to chew and cigs.

Everyone has a vise of some sort and the trick is to trade a really bad one...for a not-so-bad one, like vaping.

Maybe there's an underlying issue to identify? and not so much the switch? IDK, but vaping has been a like saver for me and I'm never looking back.

Here's one example of what advantage vaping has...

I have stage 4 colon cancer and get CT scans every six months. What my doctor has seen is my lungs slowly clearing up since I quit smoking. So as far as he and I are concerned, vaping has helped me recover from really bad lungs to not so bad.

 

[sc12]

You explained well so I think I understand where you're coming from. That said, try to relax and accept that it's ok to have a little enjoyment in life. You did well in leaving cigarettes behind.

 

[DoctorJ]

I have a rather "strange" emotional conflict I would like to vent about or get someone's thoughts on... At times I feel very guilty vaping, to the point that it is very disturbing for me.

I smoked for 35+ years (heavily) and more than 5 years ago I was finally able to quit the nasty things. The only problem was that I was only able to quit by substituting one demon for another while still being able to have nicotine. In other words, I was able to quit smoking with the use of chewing tobacco. There is no way in hades I could have quit smoking if it were not for chewing tobacco. People used to tell me that chewing tobacco was not a safe alternative and the way I viewed it at the time was that I figured that at least I wasn't doing any additional damage to my lungs. At least they would get a rest if I quit smoking so to speak. I also was fully aware that I was still just as addicted to tobacco as I always was it's just that I found an alternative delivery system in an attempt to save my lungs.

Needless to say, chewing has many drawbacks as well and it is a fairly "gross" habit, at least according to my wife I am such a nicotine junky that unlike most folks that chewed most people never knew I chewed because I always swallowed and never did anything gross like spit in front of people.

Anyway, I started finding myself CONSTANTLY chewing and I always had chew in my mouth. About the only time I never had chew in my mouth was while eating, if you can believe that..... The thing is that in the years I was chewing, my worries about lung diseases stopped and I was feeling pretty good about having quit smoking. My lung function was improved and everything seemed peachy...... However, I then started to worry about oral cancer and other problems. So, I found myself wishing I could quit chewing just as bad as I used to wish that I could quit smoking.

Then, I discovered e-cigs and thought they may help me quit chewing (which they did)..... I was able to stop chewing by vaping............. However, I have lately had this weird (or maybe not so weird) bit of guilt creeping in about vaping because in my mind it almost seems like I have started smoking again (because vaping feels like smoking)........... Even though I had quit smoking by aid of chewing tobacco I none the less was VERY HAPPY about finally being able to stop smoking after nearly 40 years of being chained to them and saving my lungs..... But now, here I am again pumping things back into my lungs. Yes, I know it's not smoke but still, I am putting things back into my lungs that I didn't have to do for the years while I was chewing.

Maybe you don't know what I am trying to get at and it's difficult to explain for sure.... Since vaping is just like smoking to me, then I feel guilty about smoking (vaping) again. Does any of this make any sense to any of you?

As MoDmAnDaN put it in so many words, you have traded one vice for another. You yourself admitted you are a nicotine junkie. I totally agree that chewing and dipping is toally gross! And since you were swallowing instead of spitting, not only did you have oral cancer to worry about, you had other cancers and digestive ailments to consider. There is no proof that vaping is the most safest alternative to quit smoking or other tobacco habits; however, you have to consider that vaping most certainly has the least amount of chemicals that come from chewing and smoking. And there are no toxins in ejuice that I know of.

I worked in the tobacco fields as a kid growing up in NC. Tobacco plants alone have some inherent dangers just handling them. The "sap" can be bad news if you get it in your eyes or on your skin. It's an irritant like you wouldn't believe! The tobacco chaff and dust from working in the curing houses can also irritate your eyes and throat. And these are just hazards from tobacco BEFORE it's manufactured for consumer use!

I get what you are saying that you kinda feel like you are smoking again. Just think though that you are not inhaling the hundreds of naturally occurring toxins, not to mention the other chemicals that are added to cigarettes. Just look at it as the lesser of two evils.

 

[Ou2mame]

You need to look at vaping as the tool to kick nicotine, not as a vice. Cut your nic levels every 3 months and you won't feel guilty, you'll feel relieved.

 

[Sir2fyablyNutz]

I've found the motions are more addictive than the nicotine. I enjoy vape to the point it relaxes me and my nicotine level is under 3 and sometimes zero, but I still vape. I lowered my nicotine in steps to alleviate any "itch" or craving the "demon" (ok, I'm being a little too dramatic) might hold on me. When someplace I can't vape I no longer have any craving to "smoke" or vape but I do really enjoy it when I pick it back up. Lowering the nicotine will conquer any guilt you have.

 

[suprtrkr]

It makes perfect sense, albeit I don't feel that way. Of course, I also didn't feel guilty about smoking. Still, I think you're on the right track. Like Sir2, I find the hand-to-mouth motion harder to break than the nic addiction. I'm down to 6 or 3mg of nic, depending on the equipment, but I don't want to put the box down. Guilty or no, I'm sure it's doing less damage to you than smoking or chewing. So vape on

 

[Mike Geaney]

My wife and I quit smoking together 3 months ago. She did the nicotine gum for about a month and was good. I went with vapeing. She doesn't think I quit anything and has been generally unsupportive which is par for the course with that disagreeable ...... The way I see it is that I have not smoked a cigarette in 3 months. After 30 years of pack a day smoking I feel great about it. My point is do what is right for you and don't be apologetic if you aren't hurting someone else in the process.

 

[supertrunker]

The evidence i have seen suggests that the most harmful thing to do is to inhale burned tobacco leaves. Other uses of tobacco and nicotine that do not involve combustion are orders of magnitude safer in comparison.

http://www.tobaccoharmreduction.org/faq/healtheffectsofst.html

That is not to say they are 100% safe, but bear in mind 'not safe' does not mean the same as 'dangerous', despite what the vested interests of Big Pharma would have you believe.

Swapping a higher risk behaviour for a lower one strikes me as a sane and reasonable approach to take for overall better health.

T

 

[Jman8]

Anyway, I started finding myself CONSTANTLY chewing and I always had chew in my mouth. About the only time I never had chew in my mouth was while eating, if you can believe that..... The thing is that in the years I was chewing, my worries about lung diseases stopped and I was feeling pretty good about having quit smoking. My lung function was improved and everything seemed peachy...... However, I then started to worry about oral cancer and other problems. So, I found myself wishing I could quit chewing just as bad as I used to wish that I could quit smoking.

Then, I discovered e-cigs and thought they may help me quit chewing (which they did)..... I was able to stop chewing by vaping............. However, I have lately had this weird (or maybe not so weird) bit of guilt creeping in about vaping because in my mind it almost seems like I have started smoking again (because vaping feels like smoking)........... Even though I had quit smoking by aid of chewing tobacco I none the less was VERY HAPPY about finally being able to stop smoking after nearly 40 years of being chained to them and saving my lungs..... But now, here I am again pumping things back into my lungs. Yes, I know it's not smoke but still, I am putting things back into my lungs that I didn't have to do for the years while I was chewing.

Maybe you don't know what I am trying to get at and it's difficult to explain for sure.... Since vaping is just like smoking to me, then I feel guilty about smoking (vaping) again. Does any of this make any sense to any of you?

Clipped off the rest of your post, because I think this paragraph is where you start to explain why you feel guilty. I find that the temptations to feel guilty are highly personal (read as subjective) and someone telling me to not feel that way sounds nice, but doesn't eradicate the temptation. Thus any good advisor is going to explore the root of that guilt. Is it a personal belief (i.e. smoking is wrong) or ingrained from family / friends, or along lines of social acceptance.

From what you are saying, the guilt stems from worry about harm you are plausibly doing to yourself by continuing to feed your desire for nicotine, or put another way, to feed your addiction. Likewise, not easy to simply tell you to stop worrying. But I do think it is possible for you to replace worry with another, more dominant feeling. Like you emphasized "very happy" with regards to smoking cessation by aid of chewing. It could be helpful for you to explore the very happy feeling and why that is, without hopefully over analyzing. I'd suggest exploring it and stick to the obvious / self evident reasons for why you feel that way. Exploring your feelings, understanding them, and staying on top of this is best thing I can think to say.

I would also add that I've quit cold turkey from smoking 3 times, never less than a year. I can relate to the temptation to feel guilty upon returning to behavior that I was at one time VERY HAPPY to be liberated from. Now as a vaper, I moderately smoke (less than a pack a month). I am VERY EXTREMELY HAPPY because of being a moderate smoker. When I first started vaping, it was to eliminate smoking, via replacement, while I knew with fairly strong certainty that I could cease the habit via cold turkey attempt. Now with vaping in the picture, I see moderate smoking as a wonderful alternative. But this is perhaps unique to me, and I bring it up in the off chance that something might click for you while reading my words.

I'm also compelled to note that worries around nicotine use are what I'd call par for the course based almost entirely on social indoctrination. We now live in a world culture where it is deemed shameful to use nicotine, really at all, but for sure in a way that is habitual / daily. IMO, this factor cannot be over emphasized. I find the shame rather easy to dismiss as the more one looks into the politics of anti-nicotine types, the more one realizes it was and always has been a propaganda battle. Thus, I've replaced shame with pride, studied up, and now have a little pity on people who I encounter who are indoctrinated to shame nic users, but who are very ill equipped to actually discuss the issue in an intellectually honest fashion.

 

[AXIOM_1]

Thanks a bunch for all of the thoughts and replies from all. Yes, Jman8 it has to do with worrying about health and what not. I wished I understood my own psychology better as there are probably some issues there (who knows)......... of course, having to watch my mother die of lung cancer from smoking didn't help me much in that department either.

I think if I had not quit smoking earlier and instead went straight into vaping then I would probably have a different attitude because of the liberation that vaping provides. However, having stopped damaging my lungs by quitting smoking earlier, I think the guilt may be stemming from the thoughts that I may be damaging my lungs once again. Of course, like the rest of you, I do not KNOW 100% if vaping is damaging my lungs or not. It's like I had won the fight once against taking harmful substances into my lungs, so that should be the end of it. But, here I am at it again. The only difference this time is I do not actually know if vaping is harmful or not.

I know this all sounds rather strange but I will "mentally" sort it out in time. All as I know is that I will never smoke again, nor will I chew again. This is more than likely the last way I will ever find to get away from ANY FORM of tobacco.

 

[VNeil]

Don't let the terrorists win...

- Nicotine is no more hazardous than caffeine. I'm waiting for the terrorists to make coffee illegal for the 90% of the population addicted to caffeine. Never gonna happen because the terrorists are all addicted to caffeine. The main difference is that nicotine is an essential vitamin (google niacin and nicotinic acid). Even the terrorists test positive for nicotine unless they never eat veggies.

- There is essentially nothing proven to be wrong with vaping. You probably do more damage to your lungs standing near any busy highway or urban street corner. All the hand wringing is about what *might* be wrong or based on a junk science test concocted to fail.
Don't let the terrorists win. Vape on and be proud of it. Seriously.

 

[AXIOM_1]

Don't let the terrorists win...

- Nicotine is no more hazardous than caffeine. I'm waiting for the terrorists to make coffee illegal of the 90% of the population addicted to caffeine. Never gonna happen because the terrorists are all addicted to caffeine. The main difference is that nicotine is an essential vitamin (google niacin and nicotinic acid). Even the terrorists test positive for nicotine unless they never eat veggies.

- There is essentially nothing proven to be wrong with vaping. You probably do more damage to your lungs standing near any busy highway or urban street corner. All the hand wringing is about what *might* be wrong or based on a junk science test concocted to fail.
Don't let the terrorists win. Vape on and be proud of it. Seriously.

Yes VNeil, thanks for the input, it really does help. All who have posted helps and I appreciate it very much! Yes, I am the type of person who has always deliberated, then often times fretted, on many things in life and it's bad for sure. In other words, I have a tendency to have more anxiety than I should have. I suppose I have dwelled on it too much since I have begun vaping. I suppose I will have to just learn to buck up and be thankful for having something that helps me to not consume tobacco.

The really funny part of everything is that my Family (my Grandparents) were tobacco farmers in Kentucky. If I had a dime for every time during the last 40 years that I wished I had never heard of tobacco, I would retire to the Virgin Islands.

Yep, I will keep vaping on, no worries about me returning to the tobacco products because it is not going to happen. You people on this forum are the best...simple as that!

 

[Ou2mame]

I was 16 when my mother died of lung cancer, so I understand what you're talking about. I started smoking in my early 20s and I would go through spells of guilt when I thought of my mother dying. Ultimately that's why I quit smoking. I don't feel guilty about vaping because if it was around when my mother was my age now, she would probably still be alive. It's traumatic to watch someone die from a self inflicted disease, and even worse to potentially inflict that fate on yourself too. We don't how how safe vaping is, but we do know that it's easily much less damaging compared to smoking. And we can regulate our nic intake and kick the habit entirely. So if you want to get rid of the guilt, you should use vaping as a tool instead of a crutch.

 

[Don Vaper]

Your story is exactly identical to mine in every way. I went through the same thought process at each step as you did. And sometimes I do feel a little guilty for vaping. My wife calls it a loophole to get back into smoking. I actually liked smoking cigs, cigars and pipes and only quit for the health reasons. When I discovered vaping, my eyes lit up at the thought of smoking again and not risking my health.

 

[NoFumus]

AXIOM, to the extent your guilt is related to your level of uncertainty about the risks of vaping, perhaps more information would help. There is are a couple of forums here under Health and Medical. For example, one concern that's been raised about vaping pertains to the chemicals in some flavoring, specifically diketones, which have been used in some juices to give a creamy flavor. While there's not enough research to say definitively these substances are dangerous when vaped, many mfgs and consumers are making efforts to avoid them.

 

[AXIOM_1]

Your story is exactly identical to mine in every way. I went through the same thought process at each step as you did. And sometimes I do feel a little guilty for vaping. My wife calls it a loophole to get back into smoking. I actually liked smoking cigs, cigars and pipes and only quit for the health reasons. When I discovered vaping, my eyes lit up at the thought of smoking again and not risking my health.

lol I know what you mean .... Well, at least there is somebody out there like myself Yes, addiction is a very weird thing for sure. I am only glad that vaping has been invented because it's probably going to help a boat load of people plus it has already helped improve many peoples health from what I have read on here. Yea, my wife is real glad I quit chewing and smoking as she HATED both activities. She is loving this whole vaping thing because she no longer has to put up with my "gross chewing" as she called it

 

[AXIOM_1]

AXIOM, to the extent your guilt is related to your level of uncertainty about the risks of vaping, perhaps more information would help. There is are a couple of forums here under Health and Medical. For example, one concern that's been raised about vaping pertains to the chemicals in some flavoring, specifically diketones, which have been used in some juices to give a creamy flavor. While there's not enough research to say definitively these substances are dangerous when vaped, many mfgs and consumers are making efforts to avoid them.

Yes, thanks for the info. I will definitely check that out. Thanks again!