Ok song parodies are not my forte, but oh well, on with my obligatory newbie post!
I am actually an ex-smoker for a few years with the occasional relapse. Unfortunately due to some back to back stressful experiences, I was starting to find myself having to fight once again with the demon in my head who likes to make my legs walk to the 7-eleven. Oddly with smoking, even during my relapses, I hated smoking. Hated. It never made me feel good and I got zero enjoyment from it. I lost two people close to me to lung cancer and to me it was just horrible and whenever I did relapse, it made me feel like crap. So what kept causing the relapses despite all that? Ugh cigs.. you suck. Anyway, I was lucky to have overcome each relapse but I was so worried the next one would be the one that started me back on them regularly.
I have never, ever stopped missing the enjoyment I used to get from smoking. No matter how long I endured as a non-smoker I never felt 100% satisfied by it. But there was no way smoking, even if the worst happened and I started smoking again, would ever be something I enjoyed. Seriously DIYD/DIYD.
A couple of weeks ago the stress was kind of at it's peak and I knew I was in a weak spot again but I was battling. Not to mention my mother had pretty much quit smoking when her closest friend died of lung cancer last year and since we tend to enable each other I wanted to stay stinkie free to not be a factor in her relapsing. She hesitantly let me know she had purchased a disposable e-cig to help her with times she was tempted to relapse. I think she might have been worried I was going to flip out. I did, but in a good way!
I had thought about buying us kits way back and did a bit of reading about e-cigs but somehow other stuff got in the way and I forgot about it. We talked about hers for about 10 mins before I was almost running to the nearest 7-eleven! LOL Since then, a worry weighing about 100 lbs is off my shoulders. With vaping I have the enjoyment I never stopped craving with smoking that I thought was gone for good. I don't have to worry about relapsing, hating it, worrying about what was going to happen with my health and I don't have to worry about my mom relapsing and going through what her best friend and my close friend went through. Plus the "hobby" aspect of vaping has really stepped in to refocus me from worrying about other things. I have OCD and having things to focus on really helps with my compulsions as does the therapeutic aspects of controlled nicotine (no matter what anyone says, I believe there are a few benefits.)
Sorry for the book, jeez! Despite being by and large an ex-smoker it never really felt "over" and the fear that anything could break the tipping point and get me back on them weighed on me every day. To some, vaping might look like I failed at being a non-smoker but I never really felt like a non-smoker. Just someone who was a smoker that always had to fight to remain smoke free.
I promise posts to other threads won't be quite so prolific! Hope I didn't put anyone off with this novel! LOL
I am actually an ex-smoker for a few years with the occasional relapse. Unfortunately due to some back to back stressful experiences, I was starting to find myself having to fight once again with the demon in my head who likes to make my legs walk to the 7-eleven. Oddly with smoking, even during my relapses, I hated smoking. Hated. It never made me feel good and I got zero enjoyment from it. I lost two people close to me to lung cancer and to me it was just horrible and whenever I did relapse, it made me feel like crap. So what kept causing the relapses despite all that? Ugh cigs.. you suck. Anyway, I was lucky to have overcome each relapse but I was so worried the next one would be the one that started me back on them regularly.
I have never, ever stopped missing the enjoyment I used to get from smoking. No matter how long I endured as a non-smoker I never felt 100% satisfied by it. But there was no way smoking, even if the worst happened and I started smoking again, would ever be something I enjoyed. Seriously DIYD/DIYD.
A couple of weeks ago the stress was kind of at it's peak and I knew I was in a weak spot again but I was battling. Not to mention my mother had pretty much quit smoking when her closest friend died of lung cancer last year and since we tend to enable each other I wanted to stay stinkie free to not be a factor in her relapsing. She hesitantly let me know she had purchased a disposable e-cig to help her with times she was tempted to relapse. I think she might have been worried I was going to flip out. I did, but in a good way!
I had thought about buying us kits way back and did a bit of reading about e-cigs but somehow other stuff got in the way and I forgot about it. We talked about hers for about 10 mins before I was almost running to the nearest 7-eleven! LOL Since then, a worry weighing about 100 lbs is off my shoulders. With vaping I have the enjoyment I never stopped craving with smoking that I thought was gone for good. I don't have to worry about relapsing, hating it, worrying about what was going to happen with my health and I don't have to worry about my mom relapsing and going through what her best friend and my close friend went through. Plus the "hobby" aspect of vaping has really stepped in to refocus me from worrying about other things. I have OCD and having things to focus on really helps with my compulsions as does the therapeutic aspects of controlled nicotine (no matter what anyone says, I believe there are a few benefits.) Sorry for the book, jeez! Despite being by and large an ex-smoker it never really felt "over" and the fear that anything could break the tipping point and get me back on them weighed on me every day. To some, vaping might look like I failed at being a non-smoker but I never really felt like a non-smoker. Just someone who was a smoker that always had to fight to remain smoke free.
I promise posts to other threads won't be quite so prolific! Hope I didn't put anyone off with this novel! LOL
