Hang in girlfriend. I notice the most amazing things happen right when you need them the most!
Oh poop, I need a little cheese with this whine
- Thread starter Safira
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Hey ladies, sorry I haven't been around. My husband has a hernia that's been bothering him for a while. Well, since he will be loosing medical he decided he better take care of this now. So this week he had the operation, oh man the poor guy, that's all I can say, is the poor guy. If anyone here ever has to go through with the surgery, don't ignore your hernia get it done, but make sure you have the drugs on hand, and just keep yourself as medicated as you can. They give you the good drugs for a reason, use them.
I actually have a few really good notes to share. 1st and most important my husbands health. I think I've mentioned he's type 1 diabetic, and has been for 32 years. For his surgery he needed blood test's, like always. He has these test's sent to ALL his doctors just incase someone else sees something of importance in it. His regular Doctor called and sounded scared, he wanted my husband to get into his kidney Dr. and see him right away. So we made calls and got him in right away. Here I am thinking great my worst fear's, he needs to go on the transplant list and start dialysis right away. Dr. comes in the room looks at my hubby and says, so why are you here? (AGH) Dr. explained some numbers did change and on a very healthy normal person it would be scary. For a diabetic it's to be expected, and his kidneys still look very healthy. If hubby can keep everything up his kidneys should still last him his life. (at the rate they are seeing) He then kind of joked with my husband and said so how about them Bears. (this was before last weekends game, grrrr)
2nd bit of good news, DH has an interview this Tuesday. He has told everyone he knows he is loosing his job. A customer of the company he works for is very interested in having my husband work for them on that side of things. Basically helping to prepare anything for printing, since he understands the print side of it, and how the companies work flow is he would be good at communicating between 2 companies. The only bad thing would be we need to take another pay cut, and he might loose his compensation if he has to give his 2 weeks. But, what's that saying one bird in the hand two in the bush. He still has to get the job and we don't know who they will hire, but the person who was doing this job got a promotion so it's nice to see they are promoting people in the company. They already know my husbands personality, he is the type that is a fun person to work with, when things are tough he works hard, but he'll also do silly little things to get people laughing and lighten the mood a little.
So if you are a praying person, if you could say a little prayer for hubby on Tuesday I'd appreciate it. Hey, if you're wiccan I'll take some good positive energy. When it comes to good thoughts and prayers I don't discriminate.
So at one point I was feeling a little like I just wanted to get off this train ride. But now I feel like I got a little better grip on most of the stressful things in my life. My dad is still very sick with alzheimer's, and I really wish my mother would go on vacation for while and get away. She gets really mad at my dad and doesn't understand HE isn't doing the things he does, it's the disease. There are times when I just can't take her temper, when I have everything else around me crumbling down. I'm trying to talk her into getting over to Florida, she has a condo there, and I really would like it if she could go over there for a while and renew her batteries. I can deal with dad, better than I can deal with my mother. (I guess I still am a daddies girl)
I actually have a few really good notes to share. 1st and most important my husbands health. I think I've mentioned he's type 1 diabetic, and has been for 32 years. For his surgery he needed blood test's, like always. He has these test's sent to ALL his doctors just incase someone else sees something of importance in it. His regular Doctor called and sounded scared, he wanted my husband to get into his kidney Dr. and see him right away. So we made calls and got him in right away. Here I am thinking great my worst fear's, he needs to go on the transplant list and start dialysis right away. Dr. comes in the room looks at my hubby and says, so why are you here? (AGH) Dr. explained some numbers did change and on a very healthy normal person it would be scary. For a diabetic it's to be expected, and his kidneys still look very healthy. If hubby can keep everything up his kidneys should still last him his life. (at the rate they are seeing) He then kind of joked with my husband and said so how about them Bears. (this was before last weekends game, grrrr)
2nd bit of good news, DH has an interview this Tuesday. He has told everyone he knows he is loosing his job. A customer of the company he works for is very interested in having my husband work for them on that side of things. Basically helping to prepare anything for printing, since he understands the print side of it, and how the companies work flow is he would be good at communicating between 2 companies. The only bad thing would be we need to take another pay cut, and he might loose his compensation if he has to give his 2 weeks. But, what's that saying one bird in the hand two in the bush. He still has to get the job and we don't know who they will hire, but the person who was doing this job got a promotion so it's nice to see they are promoting people in the company. They already know my husbands personality, he is the type that is a fun person to work with, when things are tough he works hard, but he'll also do silly little things to get people laughing and lighten the mood a little.
So if you are a praying person, if you could say a little prayer for hubby on Tuesday I'd appreciate it. Hey, if you're wiccan I'll take some good positive energy. When it comes to good thoughts and prayers I don't discriminate.
So at one point I was feeling a little like I just wanted to get off this train ride. But now I feel like I got a little better grip on most of the stressful things in my life. My dad is still very sick with alzheimer's, and I really wish my mother would go on vacation for while and get away. She gets really mad at my dad and doesn't understand HE isn't doing the things he does, it's the disease. There are times when I just can't take her temper, when I have everything else around me crumbling down. I'm trying to talk her into getting over to Florida, she has a condo there, and I really would like it if she could go over there for a while and renew her batteries. I can deal with dad, better than I can deal with my mother. (I guess I still am a daddies girl)
I do understand your Mom's frustration. I dealt with Mom and Grandma with that horrid disease! It is hard to take the same questions over and over. The anger they display..mostly out of the blue and always aimed at you. The accusations they level about you to other people. You find yourself explaining and defending yourself against what should be obvious to Doctors, family and friends that whatever it was never happened except in their befuddled minds.! Don't even get me started on meds , useless Doctors and hygiene.
Yes, we all know it's the disease talking, but for others who aren't there on a day to day basis, 24/7, it's hard to understand where the anger and frustration comes from. I know how angry I would get after dealing with Mom all day, I had to get up every couple of hours to make sure she hadn't fallen or was wandering the house leaving lit cigarettes everywhere and anywhere. For two years with Grandma and a year and a half with mom..that was my life. Thank God for Mike!
Send your mom on a vacation by all means and when she gets home make sure your Dad's medicare has a nurse or aide come in daily to give her time for a bath or a trip out of the house!
I meant to add that Mom would act almost normal when other people were around or when she was at the doctors office..they were all shocked to see how bad she really was at the end when she couldn't pretend anymore.
Yes, we all know it's the disease talking, but for others who aren't there on a day to day basis, 24/7, it's hard to understand where the anger and frustration comes from. I know how angry I would get after dealing with Mom all day, I had to get up every couple of hours to make sure she hadn't fallen or was wandering the house leaving lit cigarettes everywhere and anywhere. For two years with Grandma and a year and a half with mom..that was my life. Thank God for Mike!
Send your mom on a vacation by all means and when she gets home make sure your Dad's medicare has a nurse or aide come in daily to give her time for a bath or a trip out of the house!
I meant to add that Mom would act almost normal when other people were around or when she was at the doctors office..they were all shocked to see how bad she really was at the end when she couldn't pretend anymore.
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Oh MK I really wish my mother would let a nurse help her. The last Doctor visit he said it was time to think about more long term care like a nursing home for dad. That was just out of the question in mom's eyes, she still thinks she can do it all. The Dr. suggested a nurse should come in, and she won't hear of it. I've begged her myself to get a nurse to come in the mornings and at night. Just to help give him a bath and dress him, then at night to help get him ready for bed and in bed. She just will not hear of it.
She's having the bathroom on the 1st floor of her home remodeled for my dad. She thinks he's going to sleep on the 1st floor and then they can both more easily get in the bathroom for showers and stuff. All fine if he will actually sleep in the 1st floor bedroom she is having done. Plus, she probably still won't get any sleep because then she'll have to worry about him getting up in the middle of the night. He's already broken his hip in a fall trying to go to the bathroom without help.
My dad is just as nice as can be when we come around. But, can start a fight with mom over some of the dumbest things. (when we aren't there) The only time I see a little bit of frustration in him is when I go there to do the bills. His generation the men took care of the financial stuff, so he is like a hawk when I am doing his bills. But, I can so easily curb any frustration in him by making him think I still need his help. I just try to keep him involved with what I'm doing. He is still amazing when it comes to math so I'll ask him to make sure the book is balanced right. (he doesn't know I keep track on line) It would be faster if I just went in there and did what I had to do, but I'll take more time and talk about the bills with him and keep him involved.
The problem with mom is she can't control her own temper, and never has been able to. She is a controlling person, and must be in control at all times. (you are so NOT in control with this disease) When dad broke his hip and was in the hospital I showed up one day right after he had tried to get up and walk to the bathroom on his own. They had the warning thing on his bed, but he figured out how to turn it off. I saw rage in my mothers eyes. I made her leave, and sat with dad. Of course he behaved when I was there, but screaming and yelling at him isn't doing anyone any good. Remind him he can't get up by himself, and talk to the nurses, is all I could do.
Yes, I won't even get into hygiene issues. I have to laugh it off a little, otherwise I'd go crazy too. He's like a 2 year old when it comes to those kinds of things. Trying to flush the diaper down the the toilet, isn't even something my kids did.
She's having the bathroom on the 1st floor of her home remodeled for my dad. She thinks he's going to sleep on the 1st floor and then they can both more easily get in the bathroom for showers and stuff. All fine if he will actually sleep in the 1st floor bedroom she is having done. Plus, she probably still won't get any sleep because then she'll have to worry about him getting up in the middle of the night. He's already broken his hip in a fall trying to go to the bathroom without help.
My dad is just as nice as can be when we come around. But, can start a fight with mom over some of the dumbest things. (when we aren't there) The only time I see a little bit of frustration in him is when I go there to do the bills. His generation the men took care of the financial stuff, so he is like a hawk when I am doing his bills. But, I can so easily curb any frustration in him by making him think I still need his help. I just try to keep him involved with what I'm doing. He is still amazing when it comes to math so I'll ask him to make sure the book is balanced right. (he doesn't know I keep track on line) It would be faster if I just went in there and did what I had to do, but I'll take more time and talk about the bills with him and keep him involved.
The problem with mom is she can't control her own temper, and never has been able to. She is a controlling person, and must be in control at all times. (you are so NOT in control with this disease) When dad broke his hip and was in the hospital I showed up one day right after he had tried to get up and walk to the bathroom on his own. They had the warning thing on his bed, but he figured out how to turn it off. I saw rage in my mothers eyes. I made her leave, and sat with dad. Of course he behaved when I was there, but screaming and yelling at him isn't doing anyone any good. Remind him he can't get up by himself, and talk to the nurses, is all I could do.
Yes, I won't even get into hygiene issues. I have to laugh it off a little, otherwise I'd go crazy too. He's like a 2 year old when it comes to those kinds of things. Trying to flush the diaper down the the toilet, isn't even something my kids did.
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