..... So I was waiting by the checkout, getting lemon for my iced tea when M came up to me. She stepped very close, invading my personal space and said in a very loud stage-whisper "You smoke too much." I blinked and calmly said "No I don't. I haven't had a cigarette in over two years." "Oh, good, because when your dad moved here, he was worried about how much you smoked." So I repeated that it has been over 2 years and, once I knew she had moved out of earshot muttered "which goes to prove that it's absolutely none of your business."
Five years ago my father told her that he was worried about my smoking (she's never seen me smoke, by the way) so she decided to shove her nose in my business and make personal remarks today? I think I am ready to create a new acronymic epithet and she will be the first person to whom I will apply it -- she's an EDC (effing distaff canine.)