In the early 1960's, a consortium led by Bill Lear (of Lear Jet) set out to create The Greatest Practical Joke Man Has Ever Known.
The 8-track player they came up with proved to be a resounding success. These things would:
a. Change tracks in the middle of a song -
b. Could not be fast-forwarded or reversed -
c. The tapes ad an average lifespan of approximately 48 seconds, after which they would slow down and start to sound like the adults in a Peanuts cartoon.
And that's not all. Basically, they were simply terrible.
This success greatly angered the nation of China. China was bigger, stronger, older & wiser, yet they were not the ones to come up with this amazing trick on humanity. Since that day they have been focused on an even better practical joke. They've gone to great lengths, and dedicated a tremendous amount of resource, into finally upstaging the hallowed 8-track tapes & players.
Well, the king is finally dead (and love live the king!).
Ladies & gentlemen, I give you The Smowell. I don't even know where to start. Let's see....
OK - the battery compartment. The Allen screws are so tiny that one might require a microscope to remove and replace them. Plus, they don't even sit straight in! You've got to find the correct angle, then HOPE to get them in securely.
Build quality. Oh boy. I firmly believe that if I squeezed hard enough, in one hand, I can crush this thing. It's build like an old, cheap soda can from 1972 ("Tab" comes to mind).
The buttons rattle like a group of kindergarten kids with symbols.
It's a 25 dollar mod that I wouldn't pay 25 cents for (too late now, Bucko!). I'm sorry but the thing just plain bites.
How does it vape, you ask? HOW THE HECK WOULD I KNOW??? I couldn't even get the dang batteries inside.
Kat had originally nicknamed them, "Welly" because she wrestled with the enunciation of the idiotic name "Smowell". I agree, it's a tough-talk. I have now officially changed "Welly" to "Smelly".
And, before I put them up in the classies as a buy one, get one free (
"Smelly BOGO Sale, IF YOU DARE!"), I must tip my cap to China. They won.
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