Today is my birthday and I'm sure it's my first smoke free birthday in close to 25 years. Based on that quarter century figure one might easily think I'm at least middle aged...nope. I just turned 37. I cannot beleive I'm 37 years old and spent 25 of those 37 years poisoning myself.
I don't know if it qualifies as irony, but during those 25 years I've worked hard to maintain a healthy diet and even exercised regularly. (biking, weights, yoga) Maybe it was an effort to somehow trick myeslf into thinking I was counter balancing the effects of smoking? Who knows. I do know that smoking has been pretty much my choice and by that I mean I'm not seriously addicted to nicotine. I enjoy smoking...I hate the effects and all that goes with it, but I enjoy smoking. I think that makes my 25 year choice even more foolish than I've ever given credit for.
I tried my first cig at the age of 12 and didn't dislike it at all. I have no idea why I didn't vomit or cough up a lung the first time I inhaled. I just didn't...in fact, I liked it. No, I loved it. I liked sneaking around with my then girlfriend and watching her and her older sisters smoke. In the eyes of a 12/13 year old boy anything that got me in the company of older (and very attractive girls) was something to hold on to. That I did...I held onto it for 25 years.
For those 25 years I was more or less a closet smoker....Ashamed and embarassed about something that I chose to do. More so something I was embarassed about because it was a terrible choice and one that conflicted with everything I outwardly portray. (good diet, exercise...etc)
Most importantly it conflicted with the fact that my mom died from lung cancer 2 weeks after my 13th birthday. She was 37.
I don't know if it qualifies as irony, but during those 25 years I've worked hard to maintain a healthy diet and even exercised regularly. (biking, weights, yoga) Maybe it was an effort to somehow trick myeslf into thinking I was counter balancing the effects of smoking? Who knows. I do know that smoking has been pretty much my choice and by that I mean I'm not seriously addicted to nicotine. I enjoy smoking...I hate the effects and all that goes with it, but I enjoy smoking. I think that makes my 25 year choice even more foolish than I've ever given credit for.
I tried my first cig at the age of 12 and didn't dislike it at all. I have no idea why I didn't vomit or cough up a lung the first time I inhaled. I just didn't...in fact, I liked it. No, I loved it. I liked sneaking around with my then girlfriend and watching her and her older sisters smoke. In the eyes of a 12/13 year old boy anything that got me in the company of older (and very attractive girls) was something to hold on to. That I did...I held onto it for 25 years.
For those 25 years I was more or less a closet smoker....Ashamed and embarassed about something that I chose to do. More so something I was embarassed about because it was a terrible choice and one that conflicted with everything I outwardly portray. (good diet, exercise...etc)
Most importantly it conflicted with the fact that my mom died from lung cancer 2 weeks after my 13th birthday. She was 37.
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May you have many more smoke-free years! 
