The funny thing about this one, is that we had a dog who had separation anxiety. Whenever we left, even for a few minutes, she would leave a "present" for us. Needless to say, we were not pleased.
My father in law was getting false teeth, and he had problems with the letter "S" while he was waiting for his teeth. The first time he met the dog, he told her to sit, and she ran away with her tail between her legs!