Girltalk...Single Life

[ego-fan]

Hmm....a bit stuck here.....How do you do it ? How do you create a meningfull single-life ?
Need some girltalk....as I am stuck in the middle of nowhere.
vaping helps, It is the single best thing I have done for myself in ages.....and it keeps me off the less healthy self-medication like or eating 10 bags of something fatty

Not smoking analogs (5 weeks now), may contribute to much emotional upheaval....have you felt the blues after ditching the analogs ?

I have a sneaky suspicion that the additives in analogs tampers with the hormone-level in some way....anyone else who experience a worsening of pms as an x-smoker ?????

OH LOL maybe this is an age-problem.....about that charming midt-forty crisis

Please share your wisdom....

It takes a fool to remain sain......and I am no fool

 

[Mary Kay]

Well my best advice is to get busy..no not like that! A hobby that you can share with others..quilting, Bible study, cooking, the arts, gardening, dancing ect. They have places to go to meet others that are like minded. Also finding or starting a bowling, darts, or other fun team sport that doesn't get you sweaty so you look good while out! Find some vapers clubs..lots of fun and people at those.
As a sixty something, I have friends that I have know since I was 12. We get together often (At least I did) at dance clubs, VFW's and restaurants. Try a volunteer job a night or two a month or days if you can.
The point is to go where people are and let nature take it's course.

 

[Fudgey]

Hi ego-fan

Not smoking can affect your emotions. What Mary Kay said about getting out and doing things. Just being around people will help. Join a gym or exercise at home it will help get rid of all the nasty stuff that cigs left behind.

 

[ego-fan]

Mary K. You are a very wise woman....and I will certainly employ those tactics.....some day As i read your post, I immediately knew that I have quite a lot of healing to do.....before I csn engage in such activities I was born an optimist....and have allready found a few perks being on my own....I can for instance get up, and make popcorn and pancakes...at 3 in the morning.........and vape while eating without anyone complaining.....Hmmm....beginning to see the light me thinks.
And yes Fudgey I need to exercise...I know....it helps in so many ways...thanks for reminding me

 

[CES]

Good morning ego-fan

MK probably said it best (she has a tendency to do that )...For me, friends and a support system make all the difference, and making sure that there are things I enjoy doing mixed in with the stuff i have to do. A balance of independence and interconnectedness works best for me.

The other thing was that for the first few months after i completely switched to vaping i really did have some difficulty with motivation and my energy level was really different. I noticed it at the time, but didn't care much . I attributed it (and still do) to changes in brain chemistry associated with no longer getting some of the extra chemicals that come in cigg smoke. It did pass, and my motivation and energy went back to normal.

 

[ego-fan]

Hi CES
Thank you for sharing that info I feel absolutely nackered....it has just gotten a very little better...but I was nearly convinced that I had a fatal illness...(the dreaded LC ) ..then I thought ...Depression...having been severely abused emotionally by my sob...ex-boyfriend may he in H.. ( LOL i am now past the uncontrollable crying stage....and just feel soooo ANGRY ) Well enough of that....I will not go into any sorted details here....my best girlfriend actually got a severe ear-infektion from listening to it Time to move on.....looking forward to be inspired by you wise women.

 

[CES]

As they say...living well is the best revenge!

(my ex was a piece of work too)

 

[ego-fan]

OOH by the way....How do I make/get a great Avatar ? I am technologically challenged havent got a clue

Best Wishes

 

[ego-fan]

Oh CES
you are sooo right about that....living well...I will do my best
Vaping is a good start
Sorry to hear that you too have been unlucky in love....(sigh)....nothing is worse than being hurt by the one you love.

Best Wishes.

 

[CES]

Hey ego,

I tried to find a thread to direct you to, but all i could find were therads about how to post images.

So, toget a cool avatar, first find a picture you want to use. Save it to your computer or online with free photo management software, like photobucket. There are size limits for the image- You can check the forum rules for the maximum size.. (if it's too big it either won't load or the forum will resize it).

Then, click "settings" in the upper right corner of the page. That'll take you to your profile page. From the column on the left select "edit avatar". You can then upload the avatar file from your computer, or paste the link to the location where you stored it online (the best way to get that link is to right click on the image and select copy image location, or copy image url). The maximum image size in pixels and kb is also listed on this page).

Then "save changes"

(can't wait to see it)

 

[Wolf308]

You get used to it.

I personally made the choice years ago to stay single, mostly for 2 reasons. 1. I seemed to be only attracting real freaks of nature of the male gender and 2. all the guys I met wanted families, and I don't want children. Aside from that, since I moved to NC I have been working constantly, just trying to get back on my feet, and never seem to get there. So I don't have much of a social life anymore anyway. Like I always say, I'm either working or working out. Not much else. You do get used to it.

I didn't really notice if switching threw my emotions of kilter... who can tell with me?! LOL! I'm a walking mood swing anyway! LOL!

 

[ego-fan]

Thankyou CES
Now I will have something to do this week-end
You have a very nice avatar by the way... is it your own creation ? looks somewhat like the french surrealists style....?
OMG....this reminds me...I LOVE to paint....just havent done it in ages !

 

[CES]

Heya Wolf

Thanks ego! the dogs are real, the rest is photoshop. (I paint, and throw pottery and fuse glass - that's what i do with some of my free time)

 

[classwife]

awww...the blues...tired...no energy...yep, it passes !



...and get that chin up !

((hug))

 

[moondragon]

OMG....this reminds me...I LOVE to paint....just havent done it in ages !

Periods like this are a good time to remember things you used to do... or try things that you've thought about trying, but hadnt't before. I have always found thet finding things to get excited about and interested in will help the blues and the tiredness pass... and they will pass! Hang in there!

 

[ego-fan]

OH ..thanks yall...
you know... it really helps to get this kind of encouragement...it helps a lot
Hi Wolf I guess we are somewhat in the same situation... except I allways attract the non-committers ...I was a workoholic too....for years...all work and no play It made me ill...so much so..... that I lost everything I had worked so hard to get Now Please dont be offended...but for gods sake..grab the next guy who wants to start a family with you..have children...they are what makes life worth living as you grow older....hindsight is 20/20.

 

[Wolf308]

OH ..thanks yall...
you know... it really helps to get this kind of encouragement...it helps a lot
Hi Wolf I guess we are somewhat in the same situation... except I allways attract the non-committers ...I was a workoholic too....for years...all work and no play It made me ill...so much so..... that I lost everything I had worked so hard to get Now Please dont be offended...but for gods sake..grab the next guy who wants to start a family with you..have children...they are what makes life worth living as you grow older....hindsight is 20/20.

Trust me, I'm not a work-a-holic by any means. I haven't ever found a job that pays a decent wage, so I can't get on my feet. The worst was working for an armored car company and averaging 85 hours a week and getting maybe one day off every 8 weeks. I'm back in the retail world now, which isn't much better and doesn't do much for my personality. As for kids, I'm not the child kind. I don't mind kids, but do avoid them when possible. I realized my aversion to children a very long time ago and decided it wasn't fair to any child I might bring into the world. I actually am a 32 year old virgin, completely because I do not want children. I have had people tell me what gifts children are, that they make life worth living, etc. And that may be the case for some, but not all. So I'll just play with other people's kids occasionally.

 

[Lisa66]

Wolf, nothing wrong with that at all! My opinion is that there are probably a lot of people that have children for the wrong reasons....... I don't mean this in a sarcastic way and I'm not referring to unplanned parenthood, which just happens. I, too, never wanted children. I always kept an open mind, knowing things can change; but they didn't. For a long time I thought there must be something wrong with me. I do enjoy kids very much but never had the same feelings about it that so many of my friends have had. I admit that I wonder what it would be like to go through the process myself but I've never had any real regret. Maybe I was never meant to be a mom.

What's weird, though, is that in spite of this, children seem oddly attracted to me. One friend's daughter (around the time she was 4-6) used to scream my name over and over like she'd won a trip to Disneyland whenever she'd see me. Ok, maybe just a little bit of self-doubt.

 

[Wolf308]

Haha! We have a joke around here that I make babies cry. My neighbor/former running partner has four kids. We stopped running together when she got pregnant with the fourth one, a little girl. The baby is coming up on a year old now. I was able to hold her when she was weeks old, but after she reached about a month old she'd cry hysterically every time she was put in my arms. She loves my folks like nothing else, but the minute she comes to me, instant water works. LOL! But I seem to make babies cry, not just her. Not sure why. I think I'll just stick to dogs. Dogs love me. LOL!

 

[ego-fan]

OOH...Wolf ...and Lisa....I have been where you are...Never felt the urge to have children
Now I deeply regret my decision.
just dont end up like me.....dont do that to yourself.

Best Wishes.