Has anyone experienced this????

[mjrhartley]

Hi all...

I am in my 2nd week of vaping, running a black chrome Vamo with T3's and ProTanks. I am on my 4th day of being a non-smoker. I just want to know if anyone out there has been in my position. Through all of my past attempts to stop analogs I always asked my wife to not speak about the subject, so as not to feel pressured. This time she honored that request quite nicely, at least that's what I thought.
Last night I looked at her and said, "You know what? I did it. I quit, I'm done. You can be happy". I was thinking that she was just being cautious and didn't want me to feel pressured. In my mind when I said this I envisioned bells ringing, cakes being brought out, disco balls appearing out of nowhere... a party! She got this look across her face that I read as relief, and I saw it coming... she was about to explode with pent-up excitement and jubilation... And then... She said, "I'm concerned about the long-term effects of the e cig, and what influence seeing you using that thing will have on the kids..." etc... etc... etc...
To say I was deflated is an understatement! 22 years of analogs, a pack a day, never any success with any form of abstinence assistance until my Vamo... Years and years of my wife hating that aspect of my life. I finally did it. I know I'm done with it. The e cig should be revered as the exalted magical device that it is. What do I get instead? Grief now because I use an e cig!
I can't win... What can I do? Advice? Snide remarks? Comments all appreciated.

ps. As it was with my cigarette smoking, I don't hide my e cig use from my kids. I don't blow it in their face either, but they see me use it at times.

Thanks!

 

[Caridwen]

I understand that. I also understand where she's coming from- there's been a lot of bad press & misinformation out there.

I would go to CASAA and print out some of their information. It might put her mind at ease.

CASAA - The Consumer Advocates for Smoke-free Alternatives Association

http://casaa.org/Printable_Material.html

 

[DVDBLAIR]

"I can't win... What can I do?"

I would consider not smoking cigarettes a win. Now on to the next battle.

 

[yzer]

That's the problem with entering into a discussion: you can't control what the other person is thinking or what they will say.

I wouldn't feel too hurt about a spouse's response. She's worried about the safety of e-cigs, too. Plus, addiction is addiction regardless of the product. The best approach may be to provide some information on e-cigs as mentioned above. It's not risk-free, but vaping offers a much reduced risk compared to smoking. This may dispel some of her worries.

I never smoked indoors, but I did manage to stink up the garage for many years. Maybe you could consider becoming an outdoor or garage vaper if a compromise helps the situation.

You could also consider setting a endgame for vaping that includes a reduction in nicotine concentration and eventual cessation.

Families are social systems in which each member effects the others.

 

[potholerepairman]

Imo, she has a good point on the kids seeing you use a vape more often than cigs, but she should have bought you a crabcake platter with candles to blow out on quitting smokes.If she doesnt see the advantaqe to you not smoking nudge her to find out more info on her own, no wife cares what a husband says( my experience) only what they read, it could even come from a Mad magazine.Congrats and good luck.

PS- she(any other half) has to have something to tell you to do better, sometimes its funny when she is wrong on the subject and you know it.

 

[mjrhartley]

I understand that. I also understand where she's coming from- there's been a lot of bad press & misinformation out there.

I would go to CASAA and print out some of their information. It might put her mind at ease.

CASAA - The Consumer Advocates for Smoke-free Alternatives Association

CASAA Printable Material

Thanks for the links! I will definitely check these out! Thank you.

 

[mjrhartley]

"I can't win... What can I do?"

I would consider not smoking cigarettes a win. Now on to the next battle.

You are absolutely right... Gotta keep my eye on the ball! Thanks for the wise reminder!

 

[mjrhartley]

That's the problem with entering into a discussion: you can't control what the other person is thinking or what they will say.

I wouldn't feel too hurt about a spouse's response. She's worried about the safety of e-cigs, too. Plus, addiction is addiction regardless of the product. The best approach may be to provide some information on e-cigs as mentioned above. It's not risk-free, but vaping offers a much reduced risk compared to smoking. This may dispel some of her worries.

I never smoked indoors, but I did manage to stink up the garage for many years. Maybe you could consider becoming an outdoor or garage vaper if a compromise helps the situation.

You could also consider setting a endgame for vaping that includes a reduction in nicotine concentration and eventual cessation.

Families are social systems in which each member effects the others.

All very sage advice and suggestions. Thank you. I started out (two weeks ago) vaping at 18 mgs, which I quickly found was too much for me. I've bumped it down to 12 already. I never smoked indoors, and it wouldn't be my preference to have to go outside to vape, when I see it as being harmless, at least second-hand-wise. However, there is a good argument to be made for just keeping the peace. You are absolutely correct about families.
Thanks for your help!

 

[dbug]

I recently started vaping too and now I'm trying to get my wife to use it and she's on her 4th days now. We've been a smoker for almost 20 years. She still has questions but since I'm not an expert, I do try my best to answer her honestly.

I have a 6 year old and a 6 weeks old so I vape outside the house and I treat it like analog. My wife is complaining about sore throat but I told her that it's normal for the first few days to weeks for certain people but just try and stick to it since her body is adjusting. At least we are not putting the bad stuffs that analog has.

My wife also asked the same question about the long term effect and I have no idea on how to answer that but I did tell her that at least we are picking the lesser evil out of the two.

 

[mjrhartley]

Imo, she has a good point on the kids seeing you use a vape more often than cigs, but she should have bought you a crabcake platter with candles to blow out on quitting smokes.If she doesnt see the advantaqe to you not smoking nudge her to find out more info on her own, no wife cares what a husband says( my experience) only what they read, it could even come from a Mad magazine.Congrats and good luck.

PS- she(any other half) has to have something to tell you to do better, sometimes its funny when she is wrong on the subject and you know it.

Thanks! She absolutely has a point regarding the kids. I wouldn't say that I vape more than I smoked though... I pretty much lived outside when I smoked (I smoked a lot)! I have suggested she do her own research, but she won't. I'll give her some material, but it won't matter. She has her mind made up already, I can tell. Sadly, as I'm sure many married men out there can attest to, our wives have a long list of things about us they would like to change. When one thing changes in the direction they desire... another gets added to the list!
Thank you!

 

[BostonVape]

Damned if you do, Damned if you don't..

 

[mjrhartley]

I recently started vaping too and now I'm trying to get my wife to use it and she's on her 4th days now. We've been a smoker for almost 20 years. She still has questions but since I'm not an expert, I do try my best to answer her honestly.

I have a 6 year old and a 6 weeks old so I vape outside the house and I treat it like analog. My wife is complaining about sore throat but I told her that it's normal for the first few days to weeks for certain people but just try and stick to it since her body is adjusting. At least we are not putting the bad stuffs that analog has.

My wife also asked the same question about the long term effect and I have no idea on how to answer that but I did tell her that at least we are picking the lesser evil out of the two.

I look at it much the same way. It can't be worse for me than smoking, and maybe it's not GOOD for me per se... but I'm positive it's not worse for me! Good luck and Thanks!

 

[mjrhartley]

Damned if you do, Damned if you don't..

It's so true!

 

[FACE MEAT]

I'd be bummed also if I got that reaction from my wife.

My wife and I both quit with the help of e-cigarettes. She's since quit vaping, with the exception of trying new DIY flavors I've made.

The other day, she asked me how long I planned on using e-cigarettes. I told her I'd use them until I quit enjoying them. She had some concerns about the long-term effects of e-cigarette use. I told her about some study figures I had read here (e-cigs aren't harmless, but WAY less harmful than tobacco cigarettes).

I told her if I was forced to quit vaping, I'd almost certainly return to smoking cigarettes. As a former smoker herself, and one who quit with the help of e-cigarettes, she was able to understand where I was coming from.

You can't expect someone who has never been a smoker to understand how unbelievably difficult quitting can be.

 

[Vapoor eyes er]

My wife, a non smoker, fully supports me. Our kids also non smokers fully support me. My GP, Surgeon, Dentist and Dental Hygienist all fully support my vaping. Although it's a nice touch and adds incentive if they were non supportive it wouldn't have derailed my plans.
My wife is fully versed in the area of addiction and she understands that smoking is one of the most powerful of all addictions. It's also important for us to have a support group and ECF is not only a great place to learn and discuss diff vape gear it's more importantly our support group where like minded and understanding people can discuss the issues and support one another.

 

[yzer]

And good luck. You made a very smart move in choosing vapor over cigarettes. Stick with it, my friend.

 

[Minwoo]

Congratulations on quitting! That counts as winning in my book

 

[lilmrsyeti]

Oh man...That stinks! Every one needs encouragement when they quit...no matter which way you choose to quit. Just keep coming here and we'll have your back!

This happened, some what to my husband when he quit..him and I started vaping on the same day 39 days ago, and neither one of us has had a cig since...we couldn't have done it without each other to lean on. Anyhow, hubby was a smoker for over 40 years...when his Best Friend came over about 4 days into vaping, hubby showed it to him and told him it had been 4 days since he smoked a Cig. He was thinking, I guess, that his BF would have been happy for him...well, his BF said...AWE HECK! You're still smoking using that thing...just do what I did and toss the da*n Cigs and be done with it. That kind of burst my husbands bubble a bit. But, I just kept encourging him and he stuck with it, Thank Goodness!

Best of luck to you...this place was a life saver for me...with all the helpful folks around here and every one is so supportive.

 

[mjrhartley]

I'd be bummed also if I got that reaction from my wife.

My wife and I both quit with the help of e-cigarettes. She's since quit vaping, with the exception of trying new DIY flavors I've made.

The other day, she asked me how long I planned on using e-cigarettes. I told her I'd use them until I quit enjoying them. She had some concerns about the long-term effects of e-cigarette use. I told her about some study figures I had read here (e-cigs aren't harmless, but WAY less harmful than tobacco cigarettes).

I told her if I was forced to quit vaping, I'd almost certainly return to smoking cigarettes. As a former smoker herself, and one who quit with the help of e-cigarettes, she was able to understand where I was coming from.

You can't expect someone who has never been a smoker to understand how unbelievably difficult quitting can be.

The funny thing about that is that my wife is a former smoker! When she got pregnant with our first child she put it down, and to her credit, never picked it back up again. It's a bit of a mystery to me. Although, I have to say, each time I get a first down, she moves the goal posts on me. Sorry for the bad football reference.

Thanks!

 

[mjrhartley]

My wife, a non smoker, fully supports me. Our kids also non smokers fully support me. My GP, Surgeon, Dentist and Dental Hygienist all fully support my vaping. Although it's a nice touch and adds incentive if they were non supportive it wouldn't have derailed my plans.
My wife is fully versed in the area of addiction and she understands that smoking is one of the most powerful of all addictions. It's also important for us to have a support group and ECF is not only a great place to learn and discuss diff vape gear it's more importantly our support group where like minded and understanding people can discuss the issues and support one another.

It's great you have such support. You're quite right about ECF... exactly the reason I'm here! Thanks!