KICK BASS VAPOR Season open! Come wet a carto or atty! (ordering thread)
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Will your site FOR SURE be up this weekend?? The site not being up hasnt been an issue for me because i always know i can just pm you what i want, but my bf has been stressing over it for months. ahaha. So id like to tell him IT WILL BE UP SOON!
And i did not know you sold mods either! What do they look like and how much are they? My bf bought a mod and LOVES IT, but its $120 so i dont have that kind of money for the one he has.
And i did not know you sold mods either! What do they look like and how much are they? My bf bought a mod and LOVES IT, but its $120 so i dont have that kind of money for the one he has.
I envy those of you who can order those mod kits and put them together. I've run across several that claim to be the round cylinder types like the Ego but made so the batteries inside can be replaced without having to replace the entire battery; however, I'm barely making ends meet as it is given that we are still fighting for DH's disability (2-1/2 years and counting). The response in the denial letters, even with a firm with attorneys who handle only disability cases, comes down to denying him based on his "age" and "education." It doesn't seem to matter to them that it's not his age or his education that prevents him from working; it is his HEALTH! What is wrong with these idiots? Sorry, I didn't mean to lose my temper there but....
We've spent the last 2-1/2 years barely making ends meet because my disability from blindness is not enough to cover all the bills. I tend to stay a month or partial month behind on at least 3-4 bills each month. The ONLY bill I keep paid and I am never late with is the mortgage. I have a perfect record when it comes to paying the mortgage and the last thing I want is to screw up that perfect record; I'd give anything to lower the interest on the loan and cut the mortgage time by a bit more than half given the payments remaining are for less than 15 years now; however, I fear that if I attempt to refinance, they will hold the medical bills from DH's emergency trip to the heart center where he underwent testing & treatment for a mild then massive heart attack, stroke, and quadruple bypass surgery that required him to stay on a heart-lung bypass machine for quite sometime after the surgery before being moved from the CCCICU to a regular room and finally home. There's more than $300,000 in medical bills. But I digress....
I'd love to buy one of the mod-like units that take the 510 attys and removable, replaceable batteries that cost only $5 or so rather than the $13 to $25 to replace a sealed battery unit. Ugh... I can't see well enough to build them and I don't trust myself anywhere near a soldering iron! LOL! I've had too many burns on my hands and fingers from attempting to use them in the past before losing so much vision. But ah, I can dream... I can always dream...
We've spent the last 2-1/2 years barely making ends meet because my disability from blindness is not enough to cover all the bills. I tend to stay a month or partial month behind on at least 3-4 bills each month. The ONLY bill I keep paid and I am never late with is the mortgage. I have a perfect record when it comes to paying the mortgage and the last thing I want is to screw up that perfect record; I'd give anything to lower the interest on the loan and cut the mortgage time by a bit more than half given the payments remaining are for less than 15 years now; however, I fear that if I attempt to refinance, they will hold the medical bills from DH's emergency trip to the heart center where he underwent testing & treatment for a mild then massive heart attack, stroke, and quadruple bypass surgery that required him to stay on a heart-lung bypass machine for quite sometime after the surgery before being moved from the CCCICU to a regular room and finally home. There's more than $300,000 in medical bills. But I digress....
I'd love to buy one of the mod-like units that take the 510 attys and removable, replaceable batteries that cost only $5 or so rather than the $13 to $25 to replace a sealed battery unit. Ugh... I can't see well enough to build them and I don't trust myself anywhere near a soldering iron! LOL! I've had too many burns on my hands and fingers from attempting to use them in the past before losing so much vision. But ah, I can dream... I can always dream...
I'll say this, I would launch RIGHT NOW even though I'm short a few products and the shipworks program isn't complete but it's not completely in my hands. Last I heard we are waiting on the attachment of the SSL.
Shipworks called me and left a message while I was busy. I have a case # and a # to callback. I'm sure I can get everything on MY END done by this evening. I can't launch without an SSL though.
Re-activated my World of Warcraft game. I will check in daily to see what is happening. But will be watching and checking in frequently.
Hugs to all Hidey Holers,
Skeeterkck
Hugs to all Hidey Holers,
Skeeterkck
Time for another episode of.... Jelly Man Says!
Brought to you by the fine fisherfolks at Kick Bass Vapor - let them "Lure" you in...
Hidey-Ho folks! Jelly Man here, reporting from work (otherwise know as Hell with Florescent Lighting).
Today's topic is The Dumbs!
Yes... The Dumbs... As in, not people that are not of Einsteinian intellect, but those individuals that just do not USE the meatpie between their ears. They CAN think... They just choose not to! You see these people every day - the girl texting at 85mph down the highway... She can use technology... She can pass a written test (hence the driving)... Can communicate in some form... But is she thinking? Well... Maybe about whatever is going on with Billy Joe or Bobby Sue that is Soooo important that it HAS to be typed out before that 2 ton piece of rolling death comes to a stop, but NOT about any of us sharing our paced automotive wonderland with her!
Aaaaahhhh.... Not mentally challenged, just DUMB!
Or that Guy... You know the one... You pull into a gas station and he pulls in right on the other pump aisle and gets out of his 1977 Vega with a USA Gold hanging from his lip and proceeds to put it out with his boot right next to the gas pump. He then pulls out a couple of milk jugs and sets them on the hood of that fine piece of automotive craftmanship tar is still pinging and smoking and starts pumping gasoline into them and pulls out his cel phone and calls Bobby Joe (see previous example). Now, I know that supposedly, that line that a cel phone will ignite gasoline is supposedly a myth... But the fact that he is paying no attention to the pump and has over filled his milk jug and nice nummy, EXPLOSIVE petroleum is running into the smoking engine compartment is NOT a real cerebral moment.
You see... I have no problem with him removing himself from our lovely gene pool, just do not take me with you!
Anyway... He keeps that wreck running, so that shows some basic brain function and he dialed a phone... He also saw the no smoking sign I guess, but was he thinking?
N - O! The Dumbs!
Ok... I guess you get the point here - paying attention to your surroundings & environment and using common since, not astrophysics, is a much more important meter stick to intelligence in my book than any test in the world. Choose to think... That is all there is to it really.
Guess you fine folks can guess the day I have been having... Oh well! I at least have the Honey, Hidey hole fisherfolk to remind me what it is like to be around the Real smart people - we all use the best Joose at the best price anywhere... Period!
Well... Until next time... TGIF! Jelly Man has left the building!
Brought to you by the fine fisherfolks at Kick Bass Vapor - let them "Lure" you in...
Hidey-Ho folks! Jelly Man here, reporting from work (otherwise know as Hell with Florescent Lighting).
Today's topic is The Dumbs!
Yes... The Dumbs... As in, not people that are not of Einsteinian intellect, but those individuals that just do not USE the meatpie between their ears. They CAN think... They just choose not to! You see these people every day - the girl texting at 85mph down the highway... She can use technology... She can pass a written test (hence the driving)... Can communicate in some form... But is she thinking? Well... Maybe about whatever is going on with Billy Joe or Bobby Sue that is Soooo important that it HAS to be typed out before that 2 ton piece of rolling death comes to a stop, but NOT about any of us sharing our paced automotive wonderland with her!
Aaaaahhhh.... Not mentally challenged, just DUMB!
Or that Guy... You know the one... You pull into a gas station and he pulls in right on the other pump aisle and gets out of his 1977 Vega with a USA Gold hanging from his lip and proceeds to put it out with his boot right next to the gas pump. He then pulls out a couple of milk jugs and sets them on the hood of that fine piece of automotive craftmanship tar is still pinging and smoking and starts pumping gasoline into them and pulls out his cel phone and calls Bobby Joe (see previous example). Now, I know that supposedly, that line that a cel phone will ignite gasoline is supposedly a myth... But the fact that he is paying no attention to the pump and has over filled his milk jug and nice nummy, EXPLOSIVE petroleum is running into the smoking engine compartment is NOT a real cerebral moment.
You see... I have no problem with him removing himself from our lovely gene pool, just do not take me with you!
Anyway... He keeps that wreck running, so that shows some basic brain function and he dialed a phone... He also saw the no smoking sign I guess, but was he thinking?
N - O! The Dumbs!
Ok... I guess you get the point here - paying attention to your surroundings & environment and using common since, not astrophysics, is a much more important meter stick to intelligence in my book than any test in the world. Choose to think... That is all there is to it really.
Guess you fine folks can guess the day I have been having... Oh well! I at least have the Honey, Hidey hole fisherfolk to remind me what it is like to be around the Real smart people - we all use the best Joose at the best price anywhere... Period!
Well... Until next time... TGIF! Jelly Man has left the building!
.....................
and that is why i apologized in advance. LOL
No the feeling..I am on social security, so once a month check is the deal..
Now..This 5V boxMod comes with 1 set of bats and a bat charger for 49.95...That is way reasonable...Second set of bats are 10 extra..Several people here have this and highly recommend it..By far the price of the quality product you would be getting..
But PM Bob and he can help you......
Hope this helps..
Trisha
Now..This 5V boxMod comes with 1 set of bats and a bat charger for 49.95...That is way reasonable...Second set of bats are 10 extra..Several people here have this and highly recommend it..By far the price of the quality product you would be getting..
But PM Bob and he can help you......
Hope this helps..
Trisha
I thought it was on the money........Although I'm a R&B er myself.....
My dh and I see that sort of stuff every day (we're long haul truck drivers) and it is scary out there! That same girl that is texting will also cut in front of a big truck expecting it to stop on a dime w/40,000+lbs behind it. One time my husband saw a woman breast feeding her baby while driving in rush hour traffic in Atlanta
! Geesh! Common sense? Nah...that went out the window with courtesy and manners!
Ok, rant over....won't get into the other "Darwin Award" winners that we see everyday!
! Geesh! Common sense? Nah...that went out the window with courtesy and manners!Ok, rant over....won't get into the other "Darwin Award" winners that we see everyday!
Good morning, time to do work today
Bob & Missy you are AWESOME! Its on its way, yay
That's how I know and be sure to pay attention to my limitations. I can't use a soldering iron without burning myself constantly so I keep my .... away from them. LOL!
The best thing that ever happened for me was the e-cigarette. I've always had this fear of missing the ashtray or having the "cherry" tip falling out running the risk of catching the wall-to-wall carpet on fire and thus my home. The E-cigs have been a life-saver for me and many others who are blind. It's like a saving grace for us. Gone are the chances we will set our homes or ourselves on fire.
House fires stick in my mind b/c many years ago when I was in elementary school (last year of elementary school), there was a man who lived in a house down the road from where we lived. His house caught fire sometime in the night and burned to the ground. If it weren't for the fire fighters being so quick and excellent at their job, he would have died in that house. I can remember to this day staring at that house. It was a brick house and all that was left standing was the brick walls and the foundation whereas everything else was burn out leaving the brick walls/foundation as an empty shell of the house that stood there once. He was a drinking man and a smoker. He fell asleep (rather he passed out as he was 3x the legal blood alcohol content for legally drunk) and dropped his cigarette causing the house to catch on fire. He had burn scars but he could have lost his life vs the small amount of burns and losing his home. He got lucky.
The e-cigs have put not only me at rest of those fears but my husband, our oldest daughter, and my MIL. If Mom were still alive (my surrogate mom), she'd be equally as proud and I know she would have made the switch to e-cigs but they weren't on the market before she died from complications relating to autoimmune diseases that caused cardiac heart failure and possibly a stroke. At least she was at home when she died, which is what she wanted. She didn't want to die in a hospital the way my gram's did.
You know, it's odd that now I'm the "Grams," since my oldest daughter (also an e-cig user as is her new husband too) has two step-sons from her new husband's previous marriage. Thankfully, they all get along. The ex remarried to a nice enough fellow, according to my daughter. The four of them get along well and they put the boys first, which makes me respect them all even more.
I guess that is what makes me so angry with the FDA and the attempts they have gone to stop e-cigs. They don't seem to realize the lives that are saved from using e-cigs not only b/c there are none of the 4000+ cancer-causing carcinogens in the e-cig but also there is the fact that the e-cigs won't catch anything on fire if you drop it on your floor, carpeting, wood floors, or linoleum... It doesn't matter as they're all safe w/e-cigs, unlike tobacco cigarettes.
Catch a big fish!
Btw, I'm still trying to beat DH's 8 and 1/2lb wide-mouth Bass. I've pulled in several 6-7lb Bass but never a 9lb one to beat his record. Only, if I caught a 9lb one, I am not sure I would have the heart to have a taxedermist put him on a wall plaque as DH did. I was raised not to kill what I wasn't going to eat. It's why I quit hunting when i stopped eating wild game & meat in general with exception of seafood, esp sushi.
The best thing that ever happened for me was the e-cigarette. I've always had this fear of missing the ashtray or having the "cherry" tip falling out running the risk of catching the wall-to-wall carpet on fire and thus my home. The E-cigs have been a life-saver for me and many others who are blind. It's like a saving grace for us. Gone are the chances we will set our homes or ourselves on fire.
House fires stick in my mind b/c many years ago when I was in elementary school (last year of elementary school), there was a man who lived in a house down the road from where we lived. His house caught fire sometime in the night and burned to the ground. If it weren't for the fire fighters being so quick and excellent at their job, he would have died in that house. I can remember to this day staring at that house. It was a brick house and all that was left standing was the brick walls and the foundation whereas everything else was burn out leaving the brick walls/foundation as an empty shell of the house that stood there once. He was a drinking man and a smoker. He fell asleep (rather he passed out as he was 3x the legal blood alcohol content for legally drunk) and dropped his cigarette causing the house to catch on fire. He had burn scars but he could have lost his life vs the small amount of burns and losing his home. He got lucky.
The e-cigs have put not only me at rest of those fears but my husband, our oldest daughter, and my MIL. If Mom were still alive (my surrogate mom), she'd be equally as proud and I know she would have made the switch to e-cigs but they weren't on the market before she died from complications relating to autoimmune diseases that caused cardiac heart failure and possibly a stroke. At least she was at home when she died, which is what she wanted. She didn't want to die in a hospital the way my gram's did.
You know, it's odd that now I'm the "Grams," since my oldest daughter (also an e-cig user as is her new husband too) has two step-sons from her new husband's previous marriage. Thankfully, they all get along. The ex remarried to a nice enough fellow, according to my daughter. The four of them get along well and they put the boys first, which makes me respect them all even more.
I guess that is what makes me so angry with the FDA and the attempts they have gone to stop e-cigs. They don't seem to realize the lives that are saved from using e-cigs not only b/c there are none of the 4000+ cancer-causing carcinogens in the e-cig but also there is the fact that the e-cigs won't catch anything on fire if you drop it on your floor, carpeting, wood floors, or linoleum... It doesn't matter as they're all safe w/e-cigs, unlike tobacco cigarettes.
Catch a big fish!
Btw, I'm still trying to beat DH's 8 and 1/2lb wide-mouth Bass. I've pulled in several 6-7lb Bass but never a 9lb one to beat his record. Only, if I caught a 9lb one, I am not sure I would have the heart to have a taxedermist put him on a wall plaque as DH did. I was raised not to kill what I wasn't going to eat. It's why I quit hunting when i stopped eating wild game & meat in general with exception of seafood, esp sushi.
Yeah I was messing with Phorb........I used to listen to that song
Boy am I glad I had KBV radio on to catch that one Jelly Man!
Reminds me of being out on the lake and maybe me and one other boat. Well you start laying into the crappie or bass and out of the whole lake and they have to pull up right next to you!
Next thing you get is "oh did I cross your line?" .............. "no dipstick your reel pushed the button and slung itself over here, and you're boat it just happened to drift the OPPOSITE way the wind is blowing"
Or the ones that catch you on the ramp on your way out and see your stringer "where'd you catch that mess of fish" ...... "right here in this lake"
I'm all about helping out another fisherman and sharing tips but these are the type people hide and watch you with binoculars and when they find your crappie hole forget about it. They'll camp out there and if you do ever get the chance to fish it they'll have it fished out.
Thanks for taking my call Jelly Man, as Big Bass boB says it doesn't matter what color lure you use as long as it's watermelon red, I'll hang up and listen.
I hate the USPS!! They had my newest delivery of joose from KBV estimated for delivery today according to the tracking number and it didn't come!! I was sooo sad. I am really excited to try that Pineapple Upside Down Cake and Vape Placid that I ordered. Oh well, at least I still have my MAP tank full of Monkey Bread!!
paise, my biggest is an 8 and 1/2 as well. I have it mounted. I CPR (Catch Photo Release) all the big ones I catch but I like my fish mounts. I've got a 17inch Crappie I need to take in that's been in the freezer for 2 years due to the fact that I hadn't had the money to have it done until recently. It's good to see you around again
Yeah I was messing with Phorb........I used to listen to that song
join the party Bob, everyone else does it......i've got broad shoulders though, I can take as well as I dish out!
Thanks for the welcome back; I've had so much going on. We survived daughter's wedding; DH was in tears after walking her down the aisle then before he placed her hands into her fiancee's hands, he shook our soon-to-be SIL's hand, asked that he take care of her, then he kissed our daughter, and placed her hands in her fiancee's before stepping back to sit with me and his mother. He was even so sweet he had a spare cloth handkerchief for me b/c I was tearing up just listening. It wouldn't be the last time I was reduced to tears.
My daughter had her fiancee' take me around the dance floor at the country club knowing full well I'd memorize the length and width; it's something I do automatically due to blindness. Then he had one of the groomsmen escort me to the bridal dressing room, which was a good thing as I was the only one who knew how to lace & tighten a corset, which was built into the bodice of the top of the dress. She was absolutely beautiful! After I cinched the corset & tied it and was in the process of running the silk lacing through the outer loops, she began to cry. It was the butterflies, nerves, and the sheer notion that her childhood was ending and her life as an adult, a married woman was beginning.
I had her maid of honor finish the lacing of the outer section of the down while I held my daughter's hands and with her head leaned in to meet mine, I asked her point blank if she was certain she was ready for this b/c nobody would hold it against her if she wanted to wait. I even teased that I could have her dad bring the car around for a quick get away! LOL! She started laughing then. The photographer got a picture of us standing together with her hands in mine and our heads placed together as we talked and I tried to calm her down. It was a case of the jitters but the wedding carried on. All I can say is that it was a good thing there was plenty of vodka and orange juice around because I needed a drink the minute I hit the bridal dressing room.
She'd caught a cold and lost her voice so badly during the ceremony that the only thing she could manage was the "I do" and the officiator read out the rest for them both. She managed to whisper the part about "with this ring..." but it was difficult to hear unless you were close.
At the reception, she danced with her dad to the songs "Daddy's Little Girl/Butterfly Kisses" and then her husband danced with his mom. Finally, out of the blue she came to get me and we walked to the dance floor, just the two of us. She must have forewarned the DJ because he played a long intro to, "Slipping Through my Fingers," by ABBA as she thwarted my attempts to convince her that this was her and her dad's dance, not mine. She responded by going through a list of how I raised her as a single mother along with my younger brother and how I was both mother and father when she had only a mom and my brother only had me. Then she told me how much shed appreciated how I never gave up on her the way her biological father walked away and didn't care and even more, I found a man who was the best Dad any child could ever ask to have who would be there no questions asked and no, "I told you so's" or any of those other things that bad parents say or do when they tire of the responsibilities of being a parent before walking out on the kids. It shook me to my core to hear her thank me for all the wonderful memories and for all the love I gave her and how it was more precious and priceless than anything I could have bought if I had been fortunate enough to have money back then, which I didn't as it took everything I had from working 2-3 jobs to keep a roof over our heads, groceries, utilities, and keeping my car running. She told me that for all I did, this was my day too and I deserved to be there with her on the dance floor too.
The last thing she said was how I had taught her dates over the years to dance with her through all the formal functions she attended growing up and there were many so now it was my time and I wouldn't get out of it. That's when she nodded to the DJ and we danced together, mother and daughter. I still can't believe she managed every turn, even the double and triple turns in her wedding gown as heavy and bulky as the material was. We danced across 2/3rds of the dance floor; I wanted to make sure we didn't stumble off if I misjudged the width or length... As the song ended, she hugged me tight. I'm not certain which of us were crying more.
As we turned for her to escort us from the dance floor, I heard everyone clapping and she told me that all the guests were standing as they applauded, all 100+ guests. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to hold it together emotionally. It was such a touching moment and one that I will take me with tucked away in my heart for the rest of my life.
Her dad teased me a bit claiming I was showing him up b/c he doesn't dance. In fact, in our 20+yrs, he had never danced with me until our daughter's reception. We eloped so there wasn't any parties or formal wedding. It was most certainly a night I will carry with me forever.
Five days after her wedding, I had to undergo surgery to remove 2 cysts. The cysts were sent to pathology to find out if they were benign or if my future held breast cancer treatments instead. So far, they are benign but I have another series of tests on Monday as there's another cyst in the other side that's grown 2-1/2+ times in side. I'm planning to see an oncologist for the blood work to find out if any of the cysts remaining, as there are at the very least 5, if not more, are cancerous. I'm tired of being afraid of whether or not I have breast cancer on top of Lupus (SLE), Sjogren's, and the retinal disease. I have a high-rate of family history of breast cancer and lost an aunt to it a couple of years ago over a 3-day holiday. The cancer had grown & spread to the point there was nothing the doctors could do. I don't want that to happen to me. I still have a 14yo daughter to raise & hopefully attend her high school, then college graduations, and when she's ready and found her soul-mate, I have one more wedding to attend before I'm ready to go. Besides, even though my oldest is grown now, there is so much she has to learn about marriage, compromise, parenting when it comes to step-children, and if she chooses to have children of her own, there is lots left to teach her about being the best mother she can be. I had to literally plead with my surgeon to give me that week for her wedding so she'd have her head in her wedding vs my pathology report if it had been before the wedding. I'd not been able to help with the corset, or dance with her, dance w/our new SIL, or his father, etc... I'd have missed so much.
I caught her cold after my surgery. I had to have antibiotics but still had the upper respiratory infection, infected ears (inner/outer) and post-nasal drip from hell. It took 3 high-dose antibiotic runs before it finally began to clear up.
I've been catching up on rest and doing what my doctor ordered post-op because it took longer than usual for the incision to heal from the initial surgery. I just hope we aren't going to need to go through round 2; hwr, I've chosen to see an oncologist for the blood work to learn more and hopefully find out if there is any chance I have breast cancer. I hope not but I won't know until I go through the blood tests and etc...
I'm not sure which is more difficult, the tears and love of holding that newborn child in your arms for the first time or helping that same child as an adult get ready for her wedding day and knowing that life as we knew it will never be the same again. I know in my heart that she was never mine to keep. She was only on loan to me and for that, I am eternally grateful; hwr, it doesn't make saying good-bye to her childhood any easier. What's worse is it won't be many more years before it will be her younger sister going through the same grown-up steps and leaving home to find her niche in the world. I'll be happy for both though my heart will still be breaking from the loss of their childhoods.
PS: the only fish I've caught larger than the 8-1/2lbs is a small Marlin I caught while out deep sea fishing with friends. He was too small to keep so we let him go. I'd probably have let him go if he had been large enough to keep. LOL! I know, DH even says I must have been dropped on the head as a child. But I have to admit it would look beautiful over my fireplace if I had been able to keep it. Although, I really want to have a professionally hand made Katana with a set of Sais mounted over the fireplace.
My daughter had her fiancee' take me around the dance floor at the country club knowing full well I'd memorize the length and width; it's something I do automatically due to blindness. Then he had one of the groomsmen escort me to the bridal dressing room, which was a good thing as I was the only one who knew how to lace & tighten a corset, which was built into the bodice of the top of the dress. She was absolutely beautiful! After I cinched the corset & tied it and was in the process of running the silk lacing through the outer loops, she began to cry. It was the butterflies, nerves, and the sheer notion that her childhood was ending and her life as an adult, a married woman was beginning.
I had her maid of honor finish the lacing of the outer section of the down while I held my daughter's hands and with her head leaned in to meet mine, I asked her point blank if she was certain she was ready for this b/c nobody would hold it against her if she wanted to wait. I even teased that I could have her dad bring the car around for a quick get away! LOL! She started laughing then. The photographer got a picture of us standing together with her hands in mine and our heads placed together as we talked and I tried to calm her down. It was a case of the jitters but the wedding carried on. All I can say is that it was a good thing there was plenty of vodka and orange juice around because I needed a drink the minute I hit the bridal dressing room.
She'd caught a cold and lost her voice so badly during the ceremony that the only thing she could manage was the "I do" and the officiator read out the rest for them both. She managed to whisper the part about "with this ring..." but it was difficult to hear unless you were close.
At the reception, she danced with her dad to the songs "Daddy's Little Girl/Butterfly Kisses" and then her husband danced with his mom. Finally, out of the blue she came to get me and we walked to the dance floor, just the two of us. She must have forewarned the DJ because he played a long intro to, "Slipping Through my Fingers," by ABBA as she thwarted my attempts to convince her that this was her and her dad's dance, not mine. She responded by going through a list of how I raised her as a single mother along with my younger brother and how I was both mother and father when she had only a mom and my brother only had me. Then she told me how much shed appreciated how I never gave up on her the way her biological father walked away and didn't care and even more, I found a man who was the best Dad any child could ever ask to have who would be there no questions asked and no, "I told you so's" or any of those other things that bad parents say or do when they tire of the responsibilities of being a parent before walking out on the kids. It shook me to my core to hear her thank me for all the wonderful memories and for all the love I gave her and how it was more precious and priceless than anything I could have bought if I had been fortunate enough to have money back then, which I didn't as it took everything I had from working 2-3 jobs to keep a roof over our heads, groceries, utilities, and keeping my car running. She told me that for all I did, this was my day too and I deserved to be there with her on the dance floor too.
The last thing she said was how I had taught her dates over the years to dance with her through all the formal functions she attended growing up and there were many so now it was my time and I wouldn't get out of it. That's when she nodded to the DJ and we danced together, mother and daughter. I still can't believe she managed every turn, even the double and triple turns in her wedding gown as heavy and bulky as the material was. We danced across 2/3rds of the dance floor; I wanted to make sure we didn't stumble off if I misjudged the width or length... As the song ended, she hugged me tight. I'm not certain which of us were crying more.
As we turned for her to escort us from the dance floor, I heard everyone clapping and she told me that all the guests were standing as they applauded, all 100+ guests. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to hold it together emotionally. It was such a touching moment and one that I will take me with tucked away in my heart for the rest of my life.
Her dad teased me a bit claiming I was showing him up b/c he doesn't dance. In fact, in our 20+yrs, he had never danced with me until our daughter's reception. We eloped so there wasn't any parties or formal wedding. It was most certainly a night I will carry with me forever.
Five days after her wedding, I had to undergo surgery to remove 2 cysts. The cysts were sent to pathology to find out if they were benign or if my future held breast cancer treatments instead. So far, they are benign but I have another series of tests on Monday as there's another cyst in the other side that's grown 2-1/2+ times in side. I'm planning to see an oncologist for the blood work to find out if any of the cysts remaining, as there are at the very least 5, if not more, are cancerous. I'm tired of being afraid of whether or not I have breast cancer on top of Lupus (SLE), Sjogren's, and the retinal disease. I have a high-rate of family history of breast cancer and lost an aunt to it a couple of years ago over a 3-day holiday. The cancer had grown & spread to the point there was nothing the doctors could do. I don't want that to happen to me. I still have a 14yo daughter to raise & hopefully attend her high school, then college graduations, and when she's ready and found her soul-mate, I have one more wedding to attend before I'm ready to go. Besides, even though my oldest is grown now, there is so much she has to learn about marriage, compromise, parenting when it comes to step-children, and if she chooses to have children of her own, there is lots left to teach her about being the best mother she can be. I had to literally plead with my surgeon to give me that week for her wedding so she'd have her head in her wedding vs my pathology report if it had been before the wedding. I'd not been able to help with the corset, or dance with her, dance w/our new SIL, or his father, etc... I'd have missed so much.
I caught her cold after my surgery. I had to have antibiotics but still had the upper respiratory infection, infected ears (inner/outer) and post-nasal drip from hell. It took 3 high-dose antibiotic runs before it finally began to clear up.
I've been catching up on rest and doing what my doctor ordered post-op because it took longer than usual for the incision to heal from the initial surgery. I just hope we aren't going to need to go through round 2; hwr, I've chosen to see an oncologist for the blood work to learn more and hopefully find out if there is any chance I have breast cancer. I hope not but I won't know until I go through the blood tests and etc...
I'm not sure which is more difficult, the tears and love of holding that newborn child in your arms for the first time or helping that same child as an adult get ready for her wedding day and knowing that life as we knew it will never be the same again. I know in my heart that she was never mine to keep. She was only on loan to me and for that, I am eternally grateful; hwr, it doesn't make saying good-bye to her childhood any easier. What's worse is it won't be many more years before it will be her younger sister going through the same grown-up steps and leaving home to find her niche in the world. I'll be happy for both though my heart will still be breaking from the loss of their childhoods.
PS: the only fish I've caught larger than the 8-1/2lbs is a small Marlin I caught while out deep sea fishing with friends. He was too small to keep so we let him go. I'd probably have let him go if he had been large enough to keep. LOL! I know, DH even says I must have been dropped on the head as a child.
But I have to admit it would look beautiful over my fireplace if I had been able to keep it. Although, I really want to have a professionally hand made Katana with a set of Sais mounted over the fireplace.
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