Life sux!

[Ryle]

Since this seems to double fairly well as a support group for the emotionally bonkers (I love you all ) I figured I'd be ok posting here.

By now everyone knows that I do credit card processing.. Well.. I did.. 4 years I worked for that man, 4 years I did just about any and everything he could think of, for the last year I have ran his company for him. Not practically, not mostly, I RAN IT. For next to nothing.. $300 a week before taxes! I even went 6months without a single paycheck a couple years ago when he decided to start his own company.. 6 months without pay because of loyalty.. and I loose my job because of the wh*re that runs that dating service (the one I linked before) said I "took a tone" with her.. because I was doing 60 things at once and had 4 lines ringing and no one in the office willing to answer them and didn't have the time to schmooze her!

Is there no HONESTY in the world? No sense of LOYALTY to those that do you right? I'm so P.O.'d right now I'm uncertain whether or not I'm going to send the PV suppliers to that company anymore. The owner doesn't deserve the business. He deserves to choke.

Then of course I get home in a really bad mood, I just got canned from a job that had practically been my life after all, and all I want is the bf to show me some affection. I'm sure you ladies know how that feels.. but the ....... can't do anything but play 20questions from across the room and treat me like I've lost my mind.. like I did something wrong! .. So .. I dumped him

So now I'm jobless, boyfriendless, and all but friendless and trying not to go postal and start killing people... Anyone have a xanix they can give me?

 

[comfortably numb]

Ouch! I know you don't know me, but {{{HUGS}}}.

The boyfriend thing... well, some men just don't know how to react to things like that. A few months after I married hubby, I got fired from a job that meant a lot to me (they fired me owing me a large commission they did not want to pay) I was up all night crying, hubby just slept, not even a comforting hand on my shoulder, hug... nothing.

The job, no doubt about it, it sux...

Take a day to rest, then pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and find yourself a better job that makes you happy. Same advice applies for the boyfriend situation too.. find a better one.. You deserve more!

 

[Lucy*Sky]

I am soooooo sorry that happened to you! I wish I had a zanax to give you, but you do have a lot of support and friends on this forum. Take some time to chill out. It will probably work out for the best in the end.

 

[Kelly79]

Hey Ryle, sorry things are rough right now, that really sucks. there really is no loyalty from employers these days (I bent over backwards like that once for a job, still got fired, while 8 months pregnant, and my boss, was my bro-in-law. granted I wasn't completely blameless about that cause I went off on him in front of one of the other employees because he was being an ungrateful j@$$ but hey I was hormonal for goodness sake) Still it'll get better, I promise, might take some time but it will. And is your bf can't give you some sympathy after a ****ty thing like that happens, you deserve better anyways.

 

[JennFL5366]

omg ryle!! im so sorry sweetie! no xanex...but wild turkey helps me when i need something strong...lol that is such a chitty thing to do to you..in a case like this he will relize he screwed up when all his lines dont stop ringing and his little gf isn't doing anything...as for the boyfriend..dang im sorry on that too. never actually talked to you but ive read tons that you have done for everyone here and many hugs to you...as my hubs says we run on emotion and men run on mental (thoughts) so they have to find out every detail going on. i know when he says it only ...... me off more..take a few days dust off everything reavaluate everything and go from there. god only gives us what we can handle (just wish he didn't trust me so dang much!!)

 

[Ryle]

thanks ladies *Crooked smile* not too fussed about the bf.. will probably undump him in a couple days anyway lol.. I'm dumb like that, I take a lot off people before I'm truly done, but when I am done.. I got 4 other guys willing to take his place Don't know why TBH.. I wouldn't date me but it is nice to know that I don't have to be worried about being alone.. there's always another sucker lol .. if the BF apolgizises when he waskes up (works night shifts) then I'll forgive him for being an ......... when I'm in freakout mode I can fairly freak other people out (seveirly manic depressive.. emphisis on the manic part) .. lets just say that my keyes are in the kitchen somwhere, no idea what I did with my sweater when I got home and my stemom and little brother went upstairs to their room to nap because when I'm in freak out mode I'm likely to shank someone for lookng at me wrong.. the bf may have just been scared.. he is a bit of a wimp.. he knows he can whoop me when we're wrestling but everyone's told him that if I ever go freak out mode on him he better duck n cover (even my 6ft 4inch 400lb ex boxer dad will duck n cover when I freak out). that may be his reasoning.

I just needed some time to vent, ya know.. someone outside the situation that wouldn't say "maybe you should be nice to customers" or "what did you do wrong" or "when you gonna get a new job" or something asinine like that.

I was really amazed at how compationite my dad was though.. he called me.. told me to take a couple days and calm down & that if I cant find a job right away he'll pay my cell phone and credit card minimums until I get a job & take it out of the $8K or so that h owes me.. a VERY kind offer from him.

You guys are awesome by the way.. nothing but kind words

 

[Ursa]

Ryle, I'm glad to see you are in slightly better spirits now. Venting works wonders. Honestly though, it could be a blessing that you are out of that job since your loyalty was likely preventing you from leaving long ago to find something better for yourself.

 

[JennFL5366]

ryle, awsomness deserves it back....lol about the boyfriend...read your other post about costco...12 really? i make that at a desk job...hmmm may look into that too...doyou get benifits? hmm.....

 

[Ryle]

Yea that's the upside to being manic depressive.. you go low really fast.. blow up harder.. but you also simmer down fairly quickly.. I've been talking to friends, and you guys, and the suppliers and my dad.. I still can't believe he was so NICE... he's never nice.. he's a total jerk 99.99999999% of the time! Moreover I can't believe the first words out of his mouth weren't "what did you do" or "when you getting a new job" he's a money hound lol... nope.. just said I should take some time to simmer down "find" myself lol whatever that's supposed to mean. And started harping on the collage thing.. I don't wanna do collage.. too much of the unknown.. scares me to be honest... but he was cool.. kind of like "do whatever makes you happy" was really sweet .. for him lol. .. Would be comperable to someone else handing me a $500 check for nothing.. just to put it into perspective

mss - yea that's what I heard 12 to start for standard possitions and I'm pretty sure they do bennifits.. not something I ever cared about though (I get free medical cause I'm part indian) I just want the extra money.. lots o things that i want /need and a job like costco would give me more time to myself... I worked close to 50hours a week at my old job.. never had time for anything and was always so brain fried I couldn't think after work.. half the time I couldn't even talk straight.. but if I get a job that's nice and brain numbingly boring then I'll have the time and copacity to go back to school (maybe just online for starters) and make dad happy... so.. who wan'ts to vote on what degree I should go for? I persnally don't have a clue

 

[mbolack]

Ryle, even though you can't compete, you might just find a real niche for yourself in web consulting. I expect there are a lot of folks out there who would happily pay you to help them find the best cc processor, and then help them integrate it into their website. You might be able to indeed take advantage of all of your knowledge!

 

[Ryle]

That's a thought... maybe I'll talk to the pops and see what he has to say.

 

[WS23]

I still can't believe he was so NICE... he's never nice.. he's a total jerk 99.99999999% of the time! Moreover I can't believe the first words out of his mouth weren't "what did you do" or "when you getting a new job" he's a money hound lol...

My husband if exactly the same way. He is a total jerk about mostly everything. He .....es about ecig stuff, or anything I enjoy. He is so insensitive about everything. We have went throught some really tough stuff with trying to start a family, and he basically just doesn't care. I am completly content with adoption, and he doesn't want to spend $$ for an adoption. Wish I could just kick him to the curb in a day or so, but I am one of the ones who feels like I shoudl honor my marriage (Don't ask why, because I honestly don't know)...

 

[Mary Kay]

Ryle, the BF is doing what all guys do..staying the heck away from you until the storm blows over! They can't process emotion like we do. They want to be logical..forget that Mr. Spock! I want to yell and throw stuff! Then I can do logic. Mike tries to make a list..but he does it from across the room so I don't stab him with the pen.
As for the job..again, Forget that! Sit back and take stock. Decide what would work for you. A job that you can work on your own at your own pace (supersonic) sounds like something you would like. Check for grants..you qualify! That might even provide you with startup costs for an on-line type thing. My daughter looked into travel planning. I forget what that's called. It pays well and you can set up an at home office.
Look around, go to some Gov. sites and check them out..you pay taxes, get some back!
Most of all, know you are among friends, a rant is good for you! best of all it's free therapy. Girlfriends are always my first choice, Doctors just want to sit, take notes and repeat your questions back to you..We can do that AND give you some support, suggestions and a place to throw stuff!

 

[Mary Kay]

WS23, hello and Welcome..what a thread to do that in! Please feel free to rant too! Fun is great, but sometimes women just need a kind ear and a shoulder to lean on a lot more. I know I have and found it here.

 

[JennFL5366]

my hubs and i were going to adopt too ( i am adopted) but money stopped us. we are actually looking into doing adoption through the foster care system. the only you pay for is the home visit. not sure how it is in your state but here in florida if you adopt through foster care they still pay you monthly like if you were doing foster care and the child gets medicade and they will pay for a 4 year state college for the child. just something to look into if you really are wanting to...i have pcos and thyroid problem and it will be almost impossible for me to get preggo

My husband if exactly the same way. He is a total jerk about mostly everything. He .....es about ecig stuff, or anything I enjoy. He is so insensitive about everything. We have went throught some really tough stuff with trying to start a family, and he basically just doesn't care. I am completly content with adoption, and he doesn't want to spend $$ for an adoption. Wish I could just kick him to the curb in a day or so, but I am one of the ones who feels like I shoudl honor my marriage (Don't ask why, because I honestly don't know)...

 

[mamacat]

Hey honey! I am so sorry to hear about your trials right now. A mutual friend led me to this thread and I am so upset right now I just don't know what to do or think!

I am sending a BIG {{{HUG}}} your way! You are a smart girl with tons on the ball! Who knows?? Maybe you can do some sort of consulting and clear more in a day than you did before in a week!

Your friend, mamacat

 

[SudokuGal]

Ryle, everyone has pretty much covered the good advice.

Here's a huge


hug


for you.

 

[Ryle]

*stretch & yawn* went in laid down with the bf not long after I posted my last message here, just woke up a nap in the middle of a tuesday is always refreshing..been so long I forgot what it felt like. Now I've got a list of all the things my job held me back from that now I get to do if I want to.

Go out of town for more than a day or two.
Visit my mom.
Go back to school
Get another job paying more money (no one wanted to give me a 2nd job because I was so loyal to this one)
Spend time with the BF without being stressed
Take time to just chill (haven't had a vacation since 2007! and that was 5 days the week of the 4th of july)

Maybe I'll take dad up on his offer.. let him pay my credit card and just chill for a week or two...

:LOL: ya right.. ill be bonkers by 3 days... must find new job! < work-a-holic speaking


thx to everyone for putting up with me.. I'm not usually an emotional person.In hind sight.. I'm lucky I got out of the office before laying out my boss. & amazed I actually managed to get home without crashing.. I was reeally mad
ws23 - I don't even know what to say for you hun.. the jerk I was talking about in the statement you responded to was my dad.. I couldn't be with someone like that.

Oh and so everyone knows.. the bf has kissed .... and been forgiven

 

[Kelly79]

*stretch & yawn* went in laid down with the bf not long after I posted my last message here, just woke up a nap in the middle of a tuesday is always refreshing..been so long I forgot what it felt like. Now I've got a list of all the things my job held me back from that now I get to do if I want to.

Go out of town for more than a day or two.
Visit my mom.
Go back to school
Get another job paying more money (no one wanted to give me a 2nd job because I was so loyal to this one)
Spend time with the BF without being stressed
Take time to just chill (haven't had a vacation since 2007! and that was 5 days the week of the 4th of july)

Maybe I'll take dad up on his offer.. let him pay my credit card and just chill for a week or two...

:LOL: ya right.. ill be bonkers by 3 days... must find new job! < work-a-holic speaking


thx to everyone for putting up with me.. I'm not usually an emotional person.In hind sight.. I'm lucky I got out of the office before laying out my boss. & amazed I actually managed to get home without crashing.. I was reeally mad
ws23 - I don't even know what to say for you hun.. the jerk I was talking about in the statement you responded to was my dad.. I couldn't be with someone like that.

Oh and so everyone knows.. the bf has kissed .... and been forgiven

Glad to hear your feeling better, and that your bf paid his penance.

 

[WS23]

We did foster care, and it was the worst thing that I ever had to go through in my life. I can't even begin to imagine what the poor children in that system go through. We had two infants while we were fostering. The baby boy was returned to heroine addicts two months into their treatment because they were "doing so well". The father was dying and on a heart transplant list at age 18, and the mother was CRAZY from all of the drug use. They quit their jobs, got evicted and then vanished with him within a month of getting him back. We also had a baby girl. We got her at 3 days old. Her parents walked out of the hospital the day after she was born and told the staff to find her a home (more honerable than keeping her and not caring for her). She only weighed four pounds when we got her, and was most likley going to have some health issues. We had her for six months and we were told the entire time we would be adopting her after the six month wait time was over. Two days before we could begin the paper work they told us that there were siblings and they were placing her with another adoptive family in ANOTHER STATE (this is an important fact later in the story). She was moved over a year ago, and has yet to be adopted.

We also have had three older boys. They were in horrible foster homes (10-15 different homes in 8 years) and we have had to fight tooth and nail for them to get help from the foster care system with school (college). The state gets a huge sum of money from the government for each child in foster care ($150,000-$180,000 per year). They love having them in care while they are making the state money, but the day they turn 18 out they go. As I type our rescued foster son is sitting down the hall in his comfortable room, packing for college and talking to his girlfriend on the phone. He is here on our dime, and not even in care. He was kicked out on his 18th birthday, and showed up on our door step because he had no clue where to even look for his family after being taken from them 10 years ago. He was never given the chance to be adopted and spent over 10 years in the system.

In every experience I have had with the foster care system it all boils down to this. The system will keep the healthy children in care as long as possible without spending any money on them, and turn their backs when it's time to help them with any financial obligations (happened to all three of our boys). Children with severe disabilities will be abopted out to other states (moving them to different states removes the financial obligation of the state, and places it on the adoptive parents), look at adoptuskids.org. All of the children there either have severe disabilities or are older. One of the best social workers I have ever met told me how the system was. She told me that as she walked out of her office to quit her job because she couldn't deal with the corruption any more, and every word of it was exactly how things went for us with the foster care system. I didn't believe her at the time, but I have first had knowledge now.

My husband and I both have good jobs and college educations. We are not career foster parents like many foster parents. We wanted to adopt a child, and provide them a loving family and a great future. We were lied to, and take total advantage of by the state. All of this happened for the same reason the FDA is attacking the ecig, MONEY. So I can say this about the foster care system. I would rather spend $30-$50 thousand dollars to adopt a child through an agency than to have my heart ripped open again bue to the greed of the foster care system.

My story has gotten out, and I have even had several news and talk show hosts contact me about the corruption of the foster care system. However, since I am a teacher, I don't think it would be in my best interest to bash the state on TV. However, I will continue to tell people what is going on anytime I have the chance. My best advice with the foster care stuff is to run in the other direction as quickly as possible, especially if you have a heart. If you don't have a heart then go for it, they do pay you, but if you provide the child with what they should have you will be spending more than they give you. They make it sound good, but they don't tell you their goal is not to help you find a healthy baby that you can ADOPT....

Sorry, that went on forever, and I could continue for several days, LOL

my hubs and i were going to adopt too ( i am adopted) but money stopped us. we are actually looking into doing adoption through the foster care system. the only you pay for is the home visit. not sure how it is in your state but here in florida if you adopt through foster care they still pay you monthly like if you were doing foster care and the child gets medicade and they will pay for a 4 year state college for the child. just something to look into if you really are wanting to...i have pcos and thyroid problem and it will be almost impossible for me to get preggo