My English Composition Paper on Electronic Cigarettes. A+

[xlogit3k]

Hi, my name is Peter and Iv'e been using electronic cigarettes for a while now so when the opportunity came up to write a research paper, of course I wrote it about electronic cigarettes. If you would be so kind to click the link and read the paper and give me some insight on it that would be great. I love hearing about my writing and also about any suggestions or things you could add.

Electronic Cigarettes, The New Method to Help You Stop Smoking | Quazen

 

[washvap]

WELCOME TO THE ECF

Glad that you've taken the time to become a member here. It'll serve as a great research tool in gaining a good perspective in E-cig culture, equipment, types of e-cigs, and everything else you want to learn. You have some pretty good points that you've made in your paper. Is that your first or final draft?

 

[Off Topic]

Late in the piece you talk about how nicotine isn't really that bad of a drug. Don't gloss over how addictive it is. When I explain my PV to people I always tell them, "The only really hideous thing about nicotine is how addictive it is. And since I'm already addicted, this helps me manage that problem without poisoning myself and everyone around me."

You can quote me If you like.

 

[Njt07]

Three things from a relatively new vapor.

first you may want to consider referring to the "ecig" as a vaporizer, as soon as someone hears the word cig or cigarette they associate it with cigarettes.

Second, I don't think ecigs were invented as a smoking cessation device, rather I think they were developed as an alternative, similar to dipping, snus, herbal cigs etc. if you present vaporizers as a viable alternative to smoking then people won't automatically say your just trading one addiction for another (which I did...).

Third, you will probably want to address the most common argument against ecigs that I have heard so far which is that FDA report on the chemicals found in their "test" of eliquid. This is the most frustrating thing I have run up against when I talk with non smokers and smokers alike. Big tobacco and the media set back any real widespread acceptance of vaporizers with that one...

 

[CES]

Welcome to ECF.

I'm glad you decided to write the paper If you wanted to broaden your references there are some good resources in http://www.e-cigarette-forum.com/forum/ecf-library/156651-useful-pdfs.html

Technically, e-cigarettes can not be marketed as smoking cessation devices- that would put them into a different classification under the FDA. The drug and drug delivery device classification would require very extensive and expensive safety and efficacy testing before they could be sold at all. As an smoking alternative they can remain on the market as "tobacco" products.

 

[tonyorion]

Not badly written. Not bad at all!

Since you are submitting it for a grade, I will make a few comments. It is not nitpicking. You organized the paper well, put a lot of thought and research into it, and got your point across.

1) You substituted a "that" for a "than".
2) You missed a few commas after a conjunction. If the following phrase in a sentence starts with a noun or pronoun followed by a verb, it must be separated by a comma.
3) Some sentences are a bit long. This is style and clarity thing. As a rule of thumb, a sentence should not contain more than one subordinate clause or exceed two lines. Some teachers might grade this more strictly than others.

Even the best writers in the world use proofreaders. The paper deserves an A/A+. Don't drop points for a few oversights in grammar!

 

[xlogit3k]

Thanks for the inputs, I was looking for more information for things such as nicotine gum or patches and how well they work because from what I have found, they don't work as well as electronic cigarettes. This would help me strengthen the point the electronic cigarettes are better for quitting or even trading the habit. I appreciate all the input and would like to keep it coming, this is the 2nd draft of the paper and I need to submit the final draft by this upcoming Tuesday.

 

[Lisa66]

I would do one small thing for sure:

Other forms of the electronic cigarette are electronic pipes, and electronic cigars, there is a vast market out there now.

Either place a semi-colon after "cigars" in place of the comma or make the highlighted portion a separate sentence.

Sorry to nitpick but it's your grade!


....also, you don't need the comma after "pipes" since you're using "and".

 

[Huffelpuff]

Nicely done! Glad that you chose vaping for your paper. Hope you get an "A"

 

[Muramasa]

Hi i'm not sure if this is in time but i think u need to correct some information. The below blue fonts are abstracts from ur article. Can be found on page 3 and 4.

Electronic cigarettes are only supposed to contain four different ingredients. These four ingredients are water, propylene glycol, nicotine, and flavorings. (Propylene Glycol). Propylene glycol is used in electronic cigarettes to provide that thick vapor.

I think you forgot about VG. Vegetable Glycerin. It is use to provide the thick vapor as well. Works as diluants like PG and is a 'natural extract' (but we all know Vg dun carry the flavor as good as PG but is irrelevant here. You can also include "Pure grain alcohol is used sometimes as a diluant to flavorings" which i don't think u need to lol.)
Water would actually be too general. It should be distilled water. Tap water contains too many chemical that makes it unsafe for vaping or rather, not proven to be safe yet.

If you do a research on nicotine, it’s hard to find information regarding nicotine by itself. Nicotine is almost always accompanied by other information such as why cigarettes and tobacco are bad for you.

Actually nicotine is found on tobacco leaves hence the relation but u can find info about nicotine itself on the web quite easily, being a poison at higher lvls etc etc (ur point of 'hard to find info on nic itself' is not entirely valid)

Smoking not only effects those of you that smoke, it also affects the people around you while smoking. It also affects the people that have to smell the smoke on you all day at work or school.

I think u can enhance this point by adding what is known as "third hand smoke" When smokers are done with, particles from the burnt tobacco often clings on to the clothing, hair and whatnot of the smokers. These particles are generally known as 'free radicals'. There r studies out there showing how 'third hand smoke' can actually affect another's health. i.e. a smoker father after finishing his stick OUTSIDE the house (to keep family members away from 2nd hand smoke thinking its safer for them), proceeds indoor and carry his newborn. The newborn thus inhale the free radicals from his father's clothing or hair etc.

---
Also, gums are chewed. and patches are, well, pasted onto the skin of the users. They both works similarly, due to the fact that nicotine is dermal (will get absorb into bloodstream from surface of skin), gums when chewed will released the nicotine into ur bloodstream via ur gums and of cuz tooth cavities (which isn't pleasant at all cuz it hurts like shlt! and not to mention the awful taste of it =.=) and patches which doesn't require one to do anything except pasting it. Both of these releases nicotine into ur body for the nicotine fix but neither of these provide the simulation to the actual smoking itself. From the picking up and putting to lips, to the inhaling and exhaling of smoke And the feeling of smoke going into lungs and out thru the throat and nasal~. This is one of the reason why some smokers turn to food and snacks whilst quitting due to the body wanting to have the feeling of "ingesting". (which of cuz u have already mentioned most of the point here in ur article)

Other than the points i mentioned, the rest of the article are more or less a thumbs up except for grammatical errors and sentence structuring, which u might wanna look through again.

Good luck!! vape on~

 

[CES]

There are really only one or two publications on "3rd hand smoke" and if you read the original publications, there were some very specific, and not that common, conditions required to create what they reported.

I agree that there is a fair amount of basic research about nicotine by itself, including reports that at low concentrations it can be neuroprotective, and can also be involved in enhancing learning and memory etc.

 

[cactusgirl]

I would suggest reading the CASAA forum on ECF. If you look through some of the posts there, you'll find a lot links to research papers and very well written posts that dispel the FDAs bogus negative findings against the e-cigarette.

 

[sidetrack]

VG produces a thick cloud of vapor, PG not as much but a good carrier for flavors and makes for a stronger throat hit......There are many vapers that eventually get off the nicotine all together and go to zero mg e-liquid, myslef included. To me a very strong plus for the ecig.

 

[theBrewmeister]

good job. keep spreading the word

 

[theBrewmeister]

double post. sorry

 

[ScottinSoCal]

Hmmm. I'm always suspicious when someone asks me to click a link. I'm more suspicious when the link has something like '/shopping/' in the URL. My suspicion gets another bump when I go there directly and see such literary classics as "It can be a demanding project to choose the suitable terrain coloring pertaining to unique surface arrangements because of the fact that you have a lengthy listing you will have to decide on not of which can certainly meet the requirements you happen to be particularly looking for." and "You will see the pictures on canvas coming through the digital printing technology gaining enormous popularity as they carry the elements of elegance and grandeur in them. This is the reason why additional and additional people are getting lured by the canvas printing.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you've all been helping some company improve its marketing pitch.

 

[sandybeach]

Hmmm. I'm always suspicious when someone asks me to click a link. I'm more suspicious when the link has something like '/shopping/' in the URL. My suspicion gets another bump when I go there directly and see such literary classics as "It can be a demanding project to choose the suitable terrain coloring pertaining to unique surface arrangements because of the fact that you have a lengthy listing you will have to decide on not of which can certainly meet the requirements you happen to be particularly looking for." and "You will see the pictures on canvas coming through the digital printing technology gaining enormous popularity as they carry the elements of elegance and grandeur in them. This is the reason why additional and additional people are getting lured by the canvas printing.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you've all been helping some company improve its marketing pitch.

Yup! I reported this as a spam post last week but apparently the moderators don't agree.

 

[yo vapo]

Hi. I didn't read the whole thing, but maybe I can be of a small bit of help anyway. Near the middle of paragraph one starting with "Other forms of the electronic cigarette..." you have strung two independent clauses together with a comma. BRRRRT! Please see this link for semicolon usage tips.

I didn't notice any common misspellings or apostrophe errors in the little bit I did read -- those little things that can drive a person up a wall (especially an English teacher/professor), so good job! You might consider finding some other word than "tons" to mean "many" or "large amounts" etc. That's a style issue though, not grammar.

 

[CES]

Hmmm. I'm always suspicious when someone asks me to click a link. I'm more suspicious when the link has something like '/shopping/' in the URL. My suspicion gets another bump when I go there directly and see such literary classics as "It can be a demanding project to choose the suitable terrain coloring pertaining to unique surface arrangements because of the fact that you have a lengthy listing you will have to decide on not of which can certainly meet the requirements you happen to be particularly looking for." and "You will see the pictures on canvas coming through the digital printing technology gaining enormous popularity as they carry the elements of elegance and grandeur in them. This is the reason why additional and additional people are getting lured by the canvas printing.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you've all been helping some company improve its marketing pitch.

hmm. i just assumed that there would be ads on the page, and students have asked for assistance before. . And the OP's others posts on that site are about hobbies/interests

In either case, I'd rather have companies have accurate information- since there's a whole bunch of misinformation out there.

 

[Vapoor eyes er]

Yes I was also suspicious but after thinking about it I figure It's better to lean towards the side that believes this is someone trying to get the word out in the most accurate way possible rather than having a suspicious attitude. I salute the OP for attempting to present "our" side of the Ecig debate.
Good Luck, Vapoor.

Hmmm. I'm always suspicious when someone asks me to click a link. I'm more suspicious when the link has something like '/shopping/' in the URL. My suspicion gets another bump when I go there directly and see such literary classics as "It can be a demanding project to choose the suitable terrain coloring pertaining to unique surface arrangements because of the fact that you have a lengthy listing you will have to decide on not of which can certainly meet the requirements you happen to be particularly looking for." and "You will see the pictures on canvas coming through the digital printing technology gaining enormous popularity as they carry the elements of elegance and grandeur in them. This is the reason why additional and additional people are getting lured by the canvas printing.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess you've all been helping some company improve its marketing pitch.