1. reddhot54 >> and so goes a story of love gone bad now you know what it feels likt to have been had
2. reddhot54 >> this cant be happening its all just a dream please somebody pinch me or slap me til i scream
3. reddhot54 >> i got nuthin left you ruined my life now you can have back your cheatin wife
4. maddogg >> well hope you had fun playin with my wife all i got to say is you better run for your life
5. maddogg >> i think its time we sat dow to speak but wait until i take a leak
6. maddogg >> run for life if you want to live or im gonn stick you like a pig
7. tbrinkley >> "You silly man,"his mouth did say."This is not butter. Can't you read it's Parkay?"
8. tbrinkley >> He grabbed for the bowl grasped in my hand, and on his rumpus he did land.
9. tbrinkley >> Before I could blink the knife fell to the floor. He sprinted past me and out the door.
10. MiXoLoGiSt >> He jumped up, surprised i was there! I then tormented him, saying how much his wife likes when i pull her hair!
11. MiXoLoGiSt >> He jumped up, surprised i was there! I stood there with the knife still in hand, giving him the most evil stare!
12. MiXoLoGiSt >> He quickly put down the butter scared as can be, said i could have the butter and his wife if i would just leave.
13. isbnbook >> Slowly he put the butter down to the ground underneath and softly he stated, "That explains the hairs that are caught in my teeth."
14. isbnbook >> He sat there staring at me as melted butter covered his chest, suddenly the police charged in yelling, "Your Under Arrest!!!"
15. Dyanna @ ECF >> they're not the best things I've done in my life,
16. isbnbook >> That's when the floor started floating and the walls started to drool. I then realized that my I had been vaping Lysergic acid diethylamide all day and I must look like a fool.
17. tiburonfirst >> without that butter i can function no more - stand back, i'm easing out of the door
18. Dandafixr >> adultery with margarine is where it began
19. Dandafixr >> you've committed adultery with margarine, he said with a grin
20. Dandafixr >> thou shall not butter thy neighbors wife he said to me,
21. pwyll >> What I wouldn't give to understand what he said, but his tongue was stuck fast to the roof of his head.
22. Hummingbird >> "I'ts Valentines Day." I said just to tease. I have something for you. Now just say please!
23. pwyll >> And as his rage began to foment, I realized this was no Hallmark Moment.
24. pwyll >> Now you know I've compleatly lost touch with reality, else why would I write all this in a note I put on your pillow?
25. nordoe >> He looked at me and i and his eyes turned red, think I saw smoke coming out from his head
26. Foggy >> It came as a shock, me there in the buff. "You can have her!" he said. "I've had enough!"
27. Foggy >> My love she protested, "I don't know this guy!", He looked us both over, then left with a sigh.
28. Foggy >> "Butter?" he countered. "It's only Parkay. My two timing wife? Please take her away!"
29. klynn >> Why are you here, on the bed with your wife and my butter, you sneak? Valentine's Day is for lovers; did you come back to peek?
30. catcat >> Unspeakable things to MY wife you say? Please share what that is..and make my day!
31. klynn >> With as much dignity as I could muster, I said, "No, I won't tell, it's between her and me. I'm coming out now. I have to pee.
32. klynn >> I yelled in my best baritone, "Hey, Sneaky Pete. About time you got home. I'm a little indisposed at the moment. Could you toss me a comb?"
33. klynn >> "Hey, Sneaky Pete," I said in my best baritone. "Good to see ya. Surprise! 'Bout time you got home...
34. Krispers >> As he jumped to his feet, his wife came into the room. There were tears in her eyes and her face had turned blue.
35. Krispers >> When he stood up, the tub fell to the floor. I was started as the tub rolled to the door.
36. Krispers >> As he jumped to his feet, his wife came into the room. There were tears in her eyes and her face had turned blue.
37. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
38. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
39. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
40. Hummingbird >> Our love is true! It will last forever! You know it! You do! You Phins are so clever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
41. Hummingbird >> I got out of there. I made it snappy. I have something to make my wife happy!
42. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
43. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
44. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
45. bmwjen >> There is nothing you could do to my wife that would really surprise me. Now step on over here and high five me
46. MattC44 >> I spread it on thick, while we sipped on some wine, not missing any spots where the sun don't shine.
47. MattC44 >> With the skill of a pro and nerves made of steel, I creamed that fine woman from her head to her heel.
48. MattC44 >> You may as well know, she wants a divorce, I'm a romantic jedi and strong with the force.
49. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
50. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
51. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
52. MrsCasey >> So he turned to leave and I heard him say, it's not butter it's Parkay!
53. MrsCasey >> "My wife" he said and he laughed out loud, I'm her maid and she's taken no vows.
54. MrsCasey >> "Look here" he said "I don't want any trouble but you best be leaving on the double".
55. skydragon >> Forget the wife. I want a Phiniac to help save my life!
56. skydragon >> You are a sick, sick poet and now we all know it. =)
57. skydragon >> Butter! Did someone say butter? Pass the "buns" please.
58. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
59. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
60. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
61. ManuDawg >> He turned and said " I will fight for my lady you can take that to the bank unless you give me your Phiniac tank".
62. thehangdude >> He jumped. The butter flew in the air. It landed in my face and hair.
63. thehangdude >> He looked me over. I was nude. Wearing nothing but morning wood.
64. thehangdude >> Like baste her bird, or butter her bread. And other things better left unsaid.
65. ManuDawg >> "You can have her" he said "I knew she was cheatin but try to take this butter and your in for a beatin".
66. ManuDawg >> "She ain't my wife, I just come to get my cash I used her services last week and broke out in a rash"!
2. reddhot54 >> this cant be happening its all just a dream please somebody pinch me or slap me til i scream
3. reddhot54 >> i got nuthin left you ruined my life now you can have back your cheatin wife
4. maddogg >> well hope you had fun playin with my wife all i got to say is you better run for your life
5. maddogg >> i think its time we sat dow to speak but wait until i take a leak
6. maddogg >> run for life if you want to live or im gonn stick you like a pig
7. tbrinkley >> "You silly man,"his mouth did say."This is not butter. Can't you read it's Parkay?"
8. tbrinkley >> He grabbed for the bowl grasped in my hand, and on his rumpus he did land.
9. tbrinkley >> Before I could blink the knife fell to the floor. He sprinted past me and out the door.
10. MiXoLoGiSt >> He jumped up, surprised i was there! I then tormented him, saying how much his wife likes when i pull her hair!
11. MiXoLoGiSt >> He jumped up, surprised i was there! I stood there with the knife still in hand, giving him the most evil stare!
12. MiXoLoGiSt >> He quickly put down the butter scared as can be, said i could have the butter and his wife if i would just leave.
13. isbnbook >> Slowly he put the butter down to the ground underneath and softly he stated, "That explains the hairs that are caught in my teeth."
14. isbnbook >> He sat there staring at me as melted butter covered his chest, suddenly the police charged in yelling, "Your Under Arrest!!!"
15. Dyanna @ ECF >> they're not the best things I've done in my life,
16. isbnbook >> That's when the floor started floating and the walls started to drool. I then realized that my I had been vaping Lysergic acid diethylamide all day and I must look like a fool.
17. tiburonfirst >> without that butter i can function no more - stand back, i'm easing out of the door
18. Dandafixr >> adultery with margarine is where it began
19. Dandafixr >> you've committed adultery with margarine, he said with a grin
20. Dandafixr >> thou shall not butter thy neighbors wife he said to me,
21. pwyll >> What I wouldn't give to understand what he said, but his tongue was stuck fast to the roof of his head.
22. Hummingbird >> "I'ts Valentines Day." I said just to tease. I have something for you. Now just say please!
23. pwyll >> And as his rage began to foment, I realized this was no Hallmark Moment.
24. pwyll >> Now you know I've compleatly lost touch with reality, else why would I write all this in a note I put on your pillow?
25. nordoe >> He looked at me and i and his eyes turned red, think I saw smoke coming out from his head
26. Foggy >> It came as a shock, me there in the buff. "You can have her!" he said. "I've had enough!"
27. Foggy >> My love she protested, "I don't know this guy!", He looked us both over, then left with a sigh.
28. Foggy >> "Butter?" he countered. "It's only Parkay. My two timing wife? Please take her away!"
29. klynn >> Why are you here, on the bed with your wife and my butter, you sneak? Valentine's Day is for lovers; did you come back to peek?
30. catcat >> Unspeakable things to MY wife you say? Please share what that is..and make my day!
31. klynn >> With as much dignity as I could muster, I said, "No, I won't tell, it's between her and me. I'm coming out now. I have to pee.
32. klynn >> I yelled in my best baritone, "Hey, Sneaky Pete. About time you got home. I'm a little indisposed at the moment. Could you toss me a comb?"
33. klynn >> "Hey, Sneaky Pete," I said in my best baritone. "Good to see ya. Surprise! 'Bout time you got home...
34. Krispers >> As he jumped to his feet, his wife came into the room. There were tears in her eyes and her face had turned blue.
35. Krispers >> When he stood up, the tub fell to the floor. I was started as the tub rolled to the door.
36. Krispers >> As he jumped to his feet, his wife came into the room. There were tears in her eyes and her face had turned blue.
37. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
38. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
39. willowize >> Then I awoke with a hand on my head and heard, "How long are you gonna lay here in the bed"?
40. Hummingbird >> Our love is true! It will last forever! You know it! You do! You Phins are so clever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
41. Hummingbird >> I got out of there. I made it snappy. I have something to make my wife happy!
42. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
43. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
44. Odium >> But the man at the table simply let out a guffaw! As he revealed his side arm and said "one, two, three...draw!".
45. bmwjen >> There is nothing you could do to my wife that would really surprise me. Now step on over here and high five me
46. MattC44 >> I spread it on thick, while we sipped on some wine, not missing any spots where the sun don't shine.
47. MattC44 >> With the skill of a pro and nerves made of steel, I creamed that fine woman from her head to her heel.
48. MattC44 >> You may as well know, she wants a divorce, I'm a romantic jedi and strong with the force.
49. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
50. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
51. julbil98 >> "If you don't drop my butter now," I said. "I'll take your life and make her my wife!"
52. MrsCasey >> So he turned to leave and I heard him say, it's not butter it's Parkay!
53. MrsCasey >> "My wife" he said and he laughed out loud, I'm her maid and she's taken no vows.
54. MrsCasey >> "Look here" he said "I don't want any trouble but you best be leaving on the double".
55. skydragon >> Forget the wife. I want a Phiniac to help save my life!
56. skydragon >> You are a sick, sick poet and now we all know it. =)
57. skydragon >> Butter! Did someone say butter? Pass the "buns" please.
58. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
59. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
60. Paislia >> With that, hubby ran out screaming much like a girl. I fell over laughing til I thought I'd hurl.
61. ManuDawg >> He turned and said " I will fight for my lady you can take that to the bank unless you give me your Phiniac tank".
62. thehangdude >> He jumped. The butter flew in the air. It landed in my face and hair.
63. thehangdude >> He looked me over. I was nude. Wearing nothing but morning wood.
64. thehangdude >> Like baste her bird, or butter her bread. And other things better left unsaid.
65. ManuDawg >> "You can have her" he said "I knew she was cheatin but try to take this butter and your in for a beatin".
66. ManuDawg >> "She ain't my wife, I just come to get my cash I used her services last week and broke out in a rash"!
lots of good ones.. Here's my favs 
