The DJ started playing Saturday Night Fever and John and Joan stepped out onto the dance floor..............
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PIF to "IThrenodyI" . . .
Only to be interrupted by the entrance of Tom Cruise - who given the recent Supreme Court Ruling thought it was the right time and decide to finally come out of the closet, because for years he wanted to dance in public with his secret lover - John. So Joan hug them both and moved away to give Tom room to join John on the dance floor. All of Joan's Gay Followers and the "Zoombies" stood and cheered while John and Tom took to the dance floor and actually started dancing to the Music from "Dirty Dancing."
Only to be interrupted by the entrance of Tom Cruise - who given the recent Supreme Court Ruling thought it was the right time and decide to finally come out of the closet, because for years he wanted to dance in public with his secret lover - John. So Joan hug them both and moved away to give Tom room to join John on the dance floor. All of Joan's Gay Followers and the "Zoombies" stood and cheered while John and Tom took to the dance floor and actually started dancing to the Music from "Dirty Dancing."
Leaping onto the field was none other than Patrick Swayze, holding Jennifer Grey's original nose. "You thought we were gone for good, but this end zone music brought us back!"
Shane started wondering if it was the shine that led him to this special moment, when he heard a loud rasping bark.
Shane started wondering if it was the shine that led him to this special moment, when he heard a loud rasping bark.
then the cops came and broke it up for "disturbing the peace" and "high volume levels"
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http://i307.photobucket.com/albums/nn313/loupop13/Emoticons%203/laughing-my-...-off.gif~original
After paying the fine for "Excessive End Zone Funneration", the hopeful zombie hoard headed west, to...
...Hollywood so that they might join with kindred spirits in that land of fake plastic trees and broken dreams. Their plan set into motion they began creepily hobbling along to their destination when, out of the the blue, Shane burst forth! Chainsaw screaming in one hand and a trusty sawed-off double-barreled shotgun in the other he slaughtered the remainder of the undead parasites (the zombies, not Hollywood residents) in a furry which could only be liked to the nauseating devastation he encountered as a child back at home, in the mountains of Tennessee, when hurricane Camille struck down the majority of his family. Gasping for air and thundering with adrenaline, Shane calmed as he realized he was free of Robin Williams, Robin's mother, her boyfriend Enrico and these lifeless monstrosities. As his heart rate leveled he thought of the only thing he could now do....
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...to satisfy that 'furry' rage inside of him, was to go for a swim in the shark infested waters of the Pacific Ocean, where he could....
Swim with the sharks and kick the ever loving s**t out of one and....
that shark would be so upset and hurt by it he would swim to the other side of the world
But not before he caught one of them and had some nice grilled shark steaks for dinner... them sharks are good eatin'... 
Exhausted from his ordeal, and with a belly full of shark meat, Shane decided to...
(seriously, I love shark... there's no bones and it holds up well on the grill)
Exhausted from his ordeal, and with a belly full of shark meat, Shane decided to...
(seriously, I love shark... there's no bones and it holds up well on the grill)
...declare this day "S**t Kick a Sassy Shark Day" in honor of the beat down he had just leveled on that unsuspecting, and consequently tasty, shark. Triumphantly he strode down to the harbor and stowed away aboard a cargo vessel bound for...
China... where he hoped to pick up a ton of egig supplies dirt cheap and sell them back on the Mainland.
With only one stop in Hawaii to refuel, he had over a week of open sea until then with nothing to do.... so he decided to amuse himself by...
With only one stop in Hawaii to refuel, he had over a week of open sea until then with nothing to do.... so he decided to amuse himself by...
Clipping his toe nails with one of the sharks teeth he kicked from the sharks mouth.
Well... that took care of the 1st 10 min., now what to do for the next week???? 
Out of sight, Shane roamed the bowels of the vessel searching for a means of amusement. Deep in one of the holds he stumbled across a container marked "Eat Me". Upon opening the container he instantly recognized the contents and proceeded to partake of the spore-bearing delight. Almost instantly...
he screamed in pain. As a result of too much shine, he mistook sharp pieces of coral for crunchy Cheetos. His mouth bleeding, he stumbled to the deck and moaned "momma, momma". He crawled to the rail and...
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