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[GPC2012]

Are we there yet papa smurf?

I see angel, I see soulman, IML8, thaya, seleya, evie, CG, myself and many more.

 

[GPC2012]

Are we there yet papa smurf?

Q: What goes up and down but does not move?

A: Stairs

Depend on if their bionic or not
Bionic stairs move

 

[whodat2112]

Hello Minions, 3000 yet?

 

[whodat2112]

Happy Sunday Everyone!!!!

 

[GPC2012]

Are we there yet papa smurf?

Q: Where should a 500 pound alien go?

A: On a diet

And where can a 500 lb alien sit?
Anywhere they want.

 

[GPC2012]

Are we there yet papa smurf?

I wonder if anyone will actually read through all my spam.

I'm up this post so far, the funny thing is I thought I was one that would ramble on forever, my hat is off to you young lady. between us we should have this by tomorrow.

 

[IML8]

3,000 posts? Pfffft. That ain't no hill, for a stepper. We can knock that out before lunch. Not sayin' which day, but before lunch.

 

[GPC2012]

Q: What did the laundryman say to the impatient customer?

A: Keep your shirt on!

Q: What's the difference between a TV and a newspaper?

A: Ever tried swatting a fly with a TV?

Q: Which hand is it better to write with?

A: Neither, it's best to write with a pen!

Q: How do you cure a headache?

A: Put your head through a window and the pane will just disappear!

Q: What has four wheels and flies?

A: A garbage truck!

If I spit coffee on my screen one more time you're in for it.

Too too funny

 

[GPC2012]

Q: What did Cinderella say when her photos did not show up?

A: Someday my prints will come!

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye Matey

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?

I don't know and I don't care.

What's blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint.

If you're American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom?

European.

And on the way to the bathroom, you're Russian.

A man walks into a zoo.
The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.
It's a shih tzu.

It starts off with a farmer having a young son who is really really interested in tractors.
For his 3rd birthday his father takes him to a tractor show and the boy loves it, he can't get enough of it.
For his 10th birthday his father lets him ride with him on his tractor, again the son is loving tractors, can't get enough of them.
For his 17th birthday the father buys his son a tractor and the son is loving it for 10 hours he is riding up and down on his tractor all day at the farm, just before he is about to come home he hits a mound and the tractor flips and falls on top of the son. He was stuck there for 8 hours in the rain before his dad rescued him.
After this he absolutely hates tractors, can't stand them.
So a few months later he is walking down the street and there is a house on fire and a women screaming "my baby, save my baby".
The guy runs up to the door, breathes in and inhales all the smoke and the fire goes out, he runs up saves the baby and brings the baby back to his mum.
The women thanks him over and over again and asks how did you do it?
The son says: "Oh, its nothing I'm an ex tractor fan"

Wanna hear a clean joke?
Bob took a bath with bubbles.

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
Bubbles was a man.

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom.
First he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there’s a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there’s a large limo line at the rental office, but he’s patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there’s no punchline.

How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer.

that's buccanhilarious.

 

[whodat2112]

Ok, we got this

 

[whodat2112]

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him,
'Father, I have a problem.
I have two female parrots,
But they only know to say one thing.'
'What do they say?' the priest asked.
They say, 'Hi, we're hookers!
Do you want to have some fun?'
'That's obscene!' the priest exclaimed,
Then he thought for a moment......
'You know,' he said, 'I may have a solution to your problem.
I have two male talking parrots,
which I have taught to pray and read the Bible...
Bring your two parrots over to my house,
and we'll put them in the cage with Humphrey and George.
My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship,
And your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.'
'Thank you,' the woman responded,
'this may very well be the solution.'
The next day,
She brought her female parrots to the priest's house....
As he ushered her in,
She saw that his two male parrots
were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying...
Impressed,
She walked over and placed her parrots in with them...
After a few minutes,
The female parrots cried out in unison:
Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?'
There was stunned silence...
Shocked, one male parrot George looked over at
the other male parrot Humphrey and says...

'Put the beads away, Humphrey
Our prayers have been answered !!!

 

[GPC2012]

What happened to the cow that jumped over the barbed wire fence?

Udder destruction

what happened to the woman that backed into an airplane propeller

It utterly disassed her.

 

[whodat2112]

Louie eating breakfast!!

 

[GPC2012]

Now how did I miss seeing this earlier.

I gotta start paying better attention.

nice to see you mac how's the other side of the world?

 

[whodat2112]

Stay and help me to end the day.
And of you don't mind,
We'll break a bottle of wine.
Stick around and maybe we'll put one down,
Because I wanna find what lies behind those eyes.
Midnight blue burning gold.
A yellow moon is growing cold.
I rise, looking through my morning eyes,
Surprised to find you by my side.
Rack my brain to try to remember your name
To find the words to tell you goodbye.
Morning dues.
Newborn day.
Midnight blue turn to gray.
Midnight blue burning gold.
A yellow moon is growing cold.

 

[GPC2012]

I'll see what I can do to lend a hand here.

hand foot, head, whatever you can spare.

 

[GPC2012]

Hey I resemble that remark

 

[GPC2012]

Boy is that ever the truth.

 

[GPC2012]

Hey that's my line.

 

[whodat2112]