Cigarette Newbie

[DkGanz]

I have a bit of a technical question that maybe some of the pros can answer for me.
I just completed my first build. It's three wraps of ZigZag around flue cured Virginia on a cotton filter. Now, how much resistance can I expect from people when I light this thing in public and blow thick, nasty clouds of rank smelling smoke in their faces?

 

[fabricator4]

I have a bit of a technical question that maybe some of the pros can answer for me.
I just completed mt first build. It's three wraps of ZigZag around flue cured Virginia on a cotton filter. Now, how much resistance can I expect from people when I light this thing in public and blow thick, nasty clouds of rank smelling smoke in their faces?

None whatsoever!

They will probably be so amazed at this technological marvel that they'll ask you lots of questions. Make sure you take the opportunity to educate them about smoking and make the point that smoking is not vaping! Make sure you have some cards from local tobacconists so you can hand them out.

 

[The Ocelot]

None whatsoever!

They will probably be so amazed at this technological marvel that they'll ask you lots of questions. Make sure you take the opportunity to educate them about smoking and make the point that smoking is not vaping! Make sure you have some cards from local tobacconists so you can hand them out.

Actually, I somewhat disagree. I've encountered people who had very bad experiences with second-hand vape. I had a woman loudly proclaim that she smelt like tangerines for hours after and was ridiculed by her husband for smelling like a fruit salad. Once I convinced her that my cigarette was truly burning and she could smell real smoke clinging to their clothes, she began to calm down. On another day a woman shared with me that she was on her way to a Weight Watchers meeting when a man waiting next to her at a bus stop was vaping chocolate coconut brownie. When she got to her meeting no one believed she hadn't cheated and she lost brownie points (or whatever a they lose when they eat brownies and aren't supposed to).

I know it's wrong, but that's the reality of how we currently appear to some people.

 

[DkGanz]

None whatsoever!

They will probably be so amazed at this technological marvel that they'll ask you lots of questions. Make sure you take the opportunity to educate them about smoking and make the point that smoking is not vaping! Make sure you have some cards from local tobacconists so you can hand them out.

Will do! But, I have a few more questions. I wanna market these things, preferably to younger people, because once they have tried my product they will be loyal customers for life. Plus, these babys are only gonna last for about ten or twelve puffs before they are shot. That means i'm gonna need to produce about a bazillion of them yearly to satisfy the needs of my addicted, i mean, loyal customers. I'm also gonna need a slick marketing campaign as well as lobby for political support. In addition I will have to use "smear tactics" in an attempt to destroy anyone with a "better and safer" product than mine. Boy, that sounds like a lot of hard work, but we are talking about money here folks. GIANT, HEAPING MOUNTAINS OF BEAUTIFUL, GLORIOUS MONEY!!!

MMMMMWWAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!!!

 

[fabricator4]

Will do! But, I have a few more questions. I wanna market these things, preferably to younger people, because once they have tried my product they will be loyal customers for life. Plus, these babys are only gonna last for about ten or twelve puffs before they are shot. That means i'm gonna need to produce about a bazillion of them yearly to satisfy the needs of my addicted, i mean, loyal customers. I'm also gonna need a slick marketing campaign as well as lobby for political support. In addition I will have to use "smear tactics" in an attempt to destroy anyone with a "better and safer" product than mine. Boy, that sounds like a lot of hard work, but we are talking about money here folks. GIANT, HEAPING MOUNTAINS OF BEAUTIFUL, GLORIOUS MONEY!!!

MMMMMWWAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!!!

You won't need any money for advertising at the start. One or two puffs and they will be hooked for life! It only takes one person to hand a few around and you'll have more business than you know what to do with. I suggest you take that money you were going to spend on advertising and invest in production equipment, er, virgins with long thighs and a few chemist to work out which are the best chemicals to add to make the cigarette more addictive.

Later on you will need to invest in some advertising though, to get your brand name out there. You want something that shows how cool it is to smoke, and how everyone who smokes is a rugged individual. I suggest you look at sporting venues for sponsorship and advertising. There's bound to be plenty looking for sponsorship for advertising space now that e-cig advertising has been banned.

Silly person, you don't have to lobby for political support. Just give them some of the gobs of money you are going to be making in exchange for smoke friendly laws. They may want to introduce a tobacco tax, but don't worry because by that time the smokers will be too hooked on smoking to be able to do anything about it. Boy are they going to be paying big time, as long as they live.

 

[DkGanz]

You won't need any money for advertising at the start. One or two puffs and they will be hooked for life! It only takes one person to hand a few around and you'll have more business than you know what to do with. I suggest you take that money you were going to spend on advertising and invest in production equipment, er, virgins with long thighs and a few chemist to work out which are the best chemicals to add to make the cigarette more addictive.

Later on you will need to invest in some advertising though, to get your brand name out there. You want something that shows how cool it is to smoke, and how everyone who smokes is a rugged individual. I suggest you look at sporting venues for sponsorship and advertising. There's bound to be plenty looking for sponsorship for advertising space now that e-cig advertising has been banned.

Silly person, you don't have to lobby for political support. Just give them some of the gobs of money you are going to be making in exchange for smoke friendly laws. They may want to introduce a tobacco tax, but don't worry because by that time the smokers will be too hooked on smoking to be able to do anything about it. Boy are they going to be paying big time, as long as they live.

Mmmmyeeesss!!!
Yeeesssss!!!
What a devilishly simple and devious idea it is!!!
'Tis will be but a fortnight 'til my masterful plan reaps an unlimited bounty!!!
But wait!!!
What's this I see?
Someone HAS already come out with a "better and safer" product!!!
DRAAAT!!!
Oh well, time to formulate a new plan. I'll make a similar product! And then I'll pay off those scumbags, I mean, politicians, so that they will legislate controls and restrictions over this new "wonder product" and make it more difficult and expensive for my slaves, I mean, customers to obtain!!!
Yeeessss!!!
YEEESSSS!!!
IT'S PERFECT!!!

MMMMWWWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

 

[The Ocelot]

Mmmmyeeesss!!!
Yeeesssss!!!
What a devilishly simple and devious idea it is!!!
'Tis will be but a fortnight 'til my masterful plan reaps an unlimited bounty!!!
But wait!!!
What's this I see?
Someone HAS already come out with a "better and safer" product!!!
DRAAAT!!!
Oh well, time to formulate a new plan. I'll make a similar product! And then I'll pay off those scumbags, I mean, politicians, so that they will legislate controls and restrictions over this new "wonder product" and make it more difficult and expensive for my slaves, I mean, customers to obtain!!!
Yeeessss!!!
YEEESSSS!!!
IT'S PERFECT!!!

MMMMWWWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

 

[Ref Minor]

Will do! But, I have a few more questions. I wanna market these things, preferably to younger people, because once they have tried my product they will be loyal customers for life. Plus, these babys are only gonna last for about ten or twelve puffs before they are shot. That means i'm gonna need to produce about a bazillion of them yearly to satisfy the needs of my addicted, i mean, loyal customers. I'm also gonna need a slick marketing campaign as well as lobby for political support. In addition I will have to use "smear tactics" in an attempt to destroy anyone with a "better and safer" product than mine. Boy, that sounds like a lot of hard work, but we are talking about money here folks. GIANT, HEAPING MOUNTAINS OF BEAUTIFUL, GLORIOUS MONEY!!!

MMMMMWWAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!!!

I am afraid you have been brainwashed by Big eCig and their illuminati lackeys in the Government and their false mendacious advertising. Cigarettes are not addictive, people smoke them because they can feel the goodness seeping into their pores and want it to continue.

 

[Ref Minor]

Mmmmyeeesss!!!
Yeeesssss!!!
What a devilishly simple and devious idea it is!!!
'Tis will be but a fortnight 'til my masterful plan reaps an unlimited bounty!!!
But wait!!!
What's this I see?
Someone HAS already come out with a "better and safer" product!!!
DRAAAT!!!
Oh well, time to formulate a new plan. I'll make a similar product! And then I'll pay off those scumbags, I mean, politicians, so that they will legislate controls and restrictions over this new "wonder product" and make it more difficult and expensive for my slaves, I mean, customers to obtain!!!
Yeeessss!!!
YEEESSSS!!!
IT'S PERFECT!!!

MMMMWWWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Again, I presume you are referring to so called eCigs when you refer to a "better and safer" device. Studies have shown that tobacco is an all natural product unlike so called eCigs which require you to inhale a cocktail of man made chemicals. It's sad that people are taken in by this propaganda.

Please take the time to join CSAA (Cigarette Smokers association of America) to learn the TRUTH about these conspiracies, they do wonderful work and need our support, thank you.

Smoke hard, Smoke on.

 

[Hotwire]

Hey guys, I'm at home and have lost my lighter and my toaster is broke and the gas is cut off. Can I light this thing if I hold it next to a light bulb for long enough and puff real hard?

(Yeah you know at least two of you out there tried that once ha ha ha...)

 

[e-pipeman]

Hey guys, I'm at home and have lost my lighter and my toaster is broke and the gas is cut off. Can I light this thing if I hold it next to a light bulb for long enough and puff real hard?

(Yeah you know at least two of you out there tried that once ha ha ha...)

Have you got a magnifying glass? You can stand outside and focus the sun's rays on the end of the cigarette furthest away from your face. Inhale - it's that B&H Moment - aaaahhhh.

 

[jtpjc]

Need help on my smoke. The other day I had my Pall Mall out in the rain and it suddenly went out! I can't figure it out, I could not get it to re-ignite for an hour or so. This smoking thing is hard to figure out! I used to vape in the rain... What gives?!

You must have gotten it wet.

 

[Shadav]

omg so I got it lit and all of a sudden the cigarette started shrinking and so being a noob I figured that was normal...got towards the end and it started losing its flavor so I puffed harder and the colored end burst into flames I was driving and dropped it in my lap and now have 3rd degree burns.

tried to take them back to the clerk and explain how I must have gotten a bad pack and insisted they pay my hospital bills but he just laughed and looked at me like I was crazy then threatened to call the cops on me when I wouldn't leave....
how rude!

 

[e-pipeman]

omg so I got it lit and all of a sudden the cigarette started shrinking and so being a noob I figured that was normal...got towards the end and it started losing its flavor so I puffed harder and the colored end burst into flames I was driving and dropped it in my lap and now have 3rd degree burns.

tried to take them back to the clerk and explain how I must have gotten a bad pack and insisted they pay my hospital bills but he just laughed and looked at me like I was crazy then threatened to call the cops on me when I wouldn't leave....
how rude!

Sadly there are many people opposed to the smoking habit. Mistakenly they believe it to be a vice like vaping, whereas we all know that it is the greatest benison to humankind since antibiotics. Your burns are a badge of honour - feel your heart swell alongside the pain!

 

[Ref Minor]

omg so I got it lit and all of a sudden the cigarette started shrinking and so being a noob I figured that was normal...got towards the end and it started losing its flavor so I puffed harder and the colored end burst into flames I was driving and dropped it in my lap and now have 3rd degree burns.

tried to take them back to the clerk and explain how I must have gotten a bad pack and insisted they pay my hospital bills but he just laughed and looked at me like I was crazy then threatened to call the cops on me when I wouldn't leave....
how rude!

It's is normal, each cigarette is a self contained disposable. Once you get close to the coloured end you need to dispose of it safely, either flick it into a bin or casually drop it into a patch of dry grasses before heading on your way.

 

[e-pipeman]

It's is normal, each cigarette is a self contained disposable. Once you get close to the coloured end you need to dispose of it safely, either flick it into a bin or casually drop it into a patch of dry grasses before heading on your way.

This method seems to work particularly well in Australia.

 

[fabricator4]

Hey guys, I'm at home and have lost my lighter and my toaster is broke and the gas is cut off. Can I light this thing if I hold it next to a light bulb for long enough and puff real hard?

(Yeah you know at least two of you out there tried that once ha ha ha...)

No, but you could light it off a hot e-cig coil! Any spare kanthal?

E-cig, the new cigarette lighter!

 

[e-pipeman]

No, but you could light it off a hot e-cig coil! Any spare kanthal?

E-cig, the new cigarette lighter!

But you would still be using despicable equipment designed to hook the world onto vile, repulsive e-thingies, would you not?

 

[beckyblue]

No, but you could light it off a hot e-cig coil! Any spare kanthal?

E-cig, the new cigarette lighter!

I couldn't agree with the OP more. Banish any trace of the pg/vg menace from your life! Besides, there's a lighter to match the highly sought-after donkey dispenser -

And, until FastNic finally gets said dispenser in stock, you can all see it IN ACTION!!!

 

[fabricator4]

But you would still be using despicable equipment designed to hook the world onto vile, repulsive e-thingies, would you not?

Yes, but that's OK because it's just recycling. Everyone here is into recycling old butts into new cigarettes so I expect recycling e-cigs into cigarette lighters will really take off.