Geez, you already made a big milestone stopping smoking. Take it at your own pace and don't let your wife pressure you. I'm glad you put a stop to that conversation last weekend.
Has anyone experienced this????
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Congrats on stopping the stinkies!!! You came to the right place! Tons of information and good people to help you along!
I have the worst of both worlds - my sister quit smoking with Zyban, and in her mind, I'm still a smoker. My husband still smokes, and he said I quit.
I tend to have a lot of harebrained ideas, so no one I know takes my vaping seriously - they think it's just some kind of jag I'm on. Without ECF, I'd have no support at all.
I tend to have a lot of harebrained ideas, so no one I know takes my vaping seriously - they think it's just some kind of jag I'm on. Without ECF, I'd have no support at all.
Sorry the weekend went that way. I guess I'm not surprised after all you have shared. I guess as long as you are inhaling something then she will feel you are "smoking". No changing that. Lots of people see it that way. Sad but true. We are behind you and hope this coming weekend is better for you. 
Yeah, I hear you... That's the way it was for me with quitting smoking. I told myself a thousand times I'm quitting on this day, at this time, and there is no room for negotiation... and it never worked! Recently when I quit, I told myself that I would start vaping, and as I got used to it I just sort of assumed that the vaping would slowly replace the smoking. It happened faster than I thought it would, but there was no pressure. I think that's the key!
Thanks for your words...
Me too! Even us passive types need to set boundaries at some point!
I'm glad that at least your husband seems to understand. Your sister? I suspect she thinks she's accomplished something "more" than you in some way. Sibling rivalry perhaps? I don't know your sister, but it's possible. You're right... ECF is awesome!
Sorry the weekend went that way. I guess I'm not surprised after all you have shared. I guess as long as you are inhaling something then she will feel you are "smoking". No changing that. Lots of people see it that way. Sad but true. We are behind you and hope this coming weekend is better for you.
Skypea... you're the best~!
You pegged it right on the nose. I am also hoping that this weekend is better!!! Thanks...
I really thought your situation would not go well but I've gotta hand it to you...you're 
in my books for handling this so very well. I think you should be our resident Counselor for these types of situations Years down the road you'll be able to watch your kids graduate, walk your daughter down the aisle, witness the birth of your grandkids and rock them to sleep...there's just so much good stuff awaiting you down the road...stuff that you really deserve to see.
in my books for handling this so very well. I think you should be our resident Counselor for these types of situations Years down the road you'll be able to watch your kids graduate, walk your daughter down the aisle, witness the birth of your grandkids and rock them to sleep...there's just so much good stuff awaiting you down the road...stuff that you really deserve to see.
I think the argument about kids seeing it and it leading to analogs usually come from people who have never smoked analogs or tried vaping.
As someone who smoked for 25 yrs then switched to vaping, after just a week I took a puff of a friends Marlboro light it tasted like a burning garbage can. (I smoked camel wides)
So I just don't see anyone going from vaping to real cigs.
Don't let your wife's being a wet blanket discourage you, least your not smoking analogs round the kids anymore.
As someone who smoked for 25 yrs then switched to vaping, after just a week I took a puff of a friends Marlboro light it tasted like a burning garbage can. (I smoked camel wides)
So I just don't see anyone going from vaping to real cigs.
Don't let your wife's being a wet blanket discourage you, least your not smoking analogs round the kids anymore.
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I really thought your situation would not go well but I've gotta hand it to you...you're
All of those things are exactly the reasons I quit the smoking!!! My daughters had EVERYTHING to do with it. As for how I've handled the mess I'm in? I'm pretty proud of how I've gone about it. I must admit that I've been in therapy for about a year and a half, and it's changed my life. I found a really good therapist, and it's made a tremendous difference. I suffered abuse as a child, bore witness to (and was a pawn in) an the extremely ugly divorce of my parents when I was 9, I got a bit older and spent 12 years as a hardcore drug addict/alcoholic, I've had too many people close to me pass away/kill themselves, marriage difficulties of my own, rehab/recovery/re-life!
I've done it all in my 34 years... good and bad. I've seen the back seat of police cars, and the back seat of limousines... I've hung out with the most depraved society has to offer, and the most instantly recognizable celebrities and politicians (through work)... I've live a life already. I'm a survivor!
I now provide security/threat assessment for high profile individuals, as well as counsel other addicts like me!
I'm doing alright, and nothing will ever destroy me (until my time is up on this Earth).
If I could be designated "Forum Counselor" my trip will be complete
(Could I put that under my forum name? That would be sweeeeeett)
That's an excellent point, thank you. Camel Wides, huh? I was a Camel Light guy. We used to call Wides "tobacco cannons"!
I'm also a good friend of Bill You'll find lots of our brethren here at ECF.
You'll find lots of our brethren here at ECF.Happy to hear you're giving back and sharing your experience and success with others. I used to Counsel addicts and alcoholics but in the last 2 yrs had to cut back a bit- had to pick and choose which community progs needed help the most. Still heavily involved with a shelter that gives a "hands up" and not a hand out- remarkably successful.
You're story kinda sounds like mine except I was abused emotionally. Kudos to you as you've stopped the cycle and have laid the groundwork for your kids to live a happy and meaningful life.
You've got my vote my good friend...and I'm certain most, if not all here, would agree.
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Thanks Vapoor,
My "brand" of abuse was physical/emotional... it's amazing how inhumane we can be towards other humans! The good thing is that I've been able to use my experience to make sure my kids don't have to go through the same things. My wife, who suffered emotionally as a child thanks to a really mean Mom, used to be a bit on the physical side with the kids. I've been able to educate her on the ramifications of her actions, and now my kids get the benefit of two parents who discipline through positive, constructive methods.
As to my previous post, on re-read I think I sound a bit pretentious. Certainly there are others here who have suffered and overcome much more than me. No offense is intended.
My "brand" of abuse was physical/emotional... it's amazing how inhumane we can be towards other humans! The good thing is that I've been able to use my experience to make sure my kids don't have to go through the same things. My wife, who suffered emotionally as a child thanks to a really mean Mom, used to be a bit on the physical side with the kids. I've been able to educate her on the ramifications of her actions, and now my kids get the benefit of two parents who discipline through positive, constructive methods.
As to my previous post, on re-read I think I sound a bit pretentious. Certainly there are others here who have suffered and overcome much more than me. No offense is intended.
I wouldn't agree as you were talking straight from the heart and that's a good thing. I found with my program dealing with emotional baggage was my greatest obstacle BUT once past that the growth and happiness just flowed into my life.
I found this to be a very true statement in my life also. It took the death of my Mum at 57 (from smoking) to allow me to let go of the anger. My Mum was not the abuser, but her passing was so heart-breaking that it allowed me to understand the true meaning of the phrase, "Life is too short." I just couldn't find the energy to be angry any longer. Proof positive that even the absolute worst situations have the ability to teach a life lesson!
Happy day to all.
Thanks Skypea!!! Right back at cha!
Thanks again to all for the advice, the help, the kind words. This thread is what convinced me that I'm in the right place here at ECF! I appreciate it!
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