I knew this would happen---falling off the wagon

[Joyce]

I'm spending the week with a girlfriend who smokes my brand, and I couldn't resist. I've had two analogs, one last night, and one this morning. I'm continuing to vape, but I'm not getting the "OMG, cigs are so NASTY!" reaction I was hoping for.

I live with a smoker, but he doesn't smoke my brand, and comes in smelling so bad I don't have any desire to smoke around him. It's harder with my bff, because she does smoke my brand, plus it is social. She doesn't pressure me, it just something we've had in common, lo these many, many years. I also plan to give her my V4L card and spiel tonight.

I didn't expect it to be this hard at 2+ months in. I guess I have to revamp my counter now. But that'll be okay, since I actually started vaping in August, I'll just change it to "vaping" instead of "Smoke-free", and set it back a few months.

 

[technovapir]

I don't think the cravings ever completely go away. Since smoking is such a social connector, I can see how this happened. Don't be too hard on yourself. You still are vaping, and thats a great step. Every analog you DON't smoke is what really matters.

I also have bought some SNUS just to use when I have the occasional really bad craving. Seems to supplement the vaping nicely. But, I'm lucky...all of my friends & family have pretty much quit smoking so I'm not around it too much.
Big Hug to you!

 

[wader2k]

Hey Joyce!

Don't worry..I like to think of this as a NO PRESSURE kinda thing.

To be honest I still have one with my morning coffee. I may eventually eliminate that.....but I'm not going to stress about it. I think that is part of it's success for me. If I was stressing about it I would probably have a much harder time staying away from analogs.

And that one in the morning is a whole lot better than the 2packs/day it used to be!

 

[K9Luvr]

Joyce, Don't be so hard on yourself. This is a journey, everyone's experience is different. As Tech said, every analog not smoked is a victory. I was one of the lucky ones who was able to quit analogs immediately, and I still had a 'drag' or two every time I visited one of my smoking buddies for a little while. But that stopped, and you will find your own way. Congratulate yourself on the many analogs you DIDN'T smoke ;-)

 

[SnowDragon]

+1 Wader

Joyce my dear stop being so hard on yourself, no need to reset your counter or get down over a couple of cigarettes. I tend to think many of us set the bar too high and forget that we are dealing with years of patterning and addiction. The fact that you had a couple and didn't run out to the store to buy a pack is a great accomplishment within itself.

Now I know for a fact that Joyce is one the coolest family members on this forum, as a favor to me, be cool to her!

 

[Mmc]

don't stress over it, think of all the smokes you have skipped!!!!!!

 

[Iowa Gal]

Joyce - hey you are on vacation and ya know the saying what happens on vacation stays on vacation... Don't beat yourself up over a couple of cigs... Keep on vaping and as Snow said just don't run out and buy a pack. My husband quit cold turkey about 4 years ago but when we are away from home and relaxing he will have an occasional cigar. Nothing to worry about just keep on vaping baby

 

[jeffree]

Joyce, I've been preaching the don't even try one approach whenever I get the chance. Cigs don't taste bad to everyone after some weeks or months away. I watched someone I know do what you did, even after several months of only vaping. and she then went back to cigs full-time. The good news--she dropped the cigs again two months later and has been cig-free again for four months now. A lot of paths can lead to the same result. Good luck on your own journey!

 

[ValleyGirl]

No worries, Joyce...we still love you

 

[Tracker II]

Hey Joyce. So what you're telling us is that you're human ... (yawn). The title of your thread, "I knew this would happen", is quite telling if I may put my Dr Phil hat on for a second. You went into this with an all or nothing attitude - no smokes equal success but even just one smoke equals failure. As the others have said, focus on how many you haven't smoked and glory in your success rather than look at the few you have and see yourself as failing. And so what if you fall off the wagon once in a great while. The great thing about vaping is that it's so easy to jump back on.

I hope this didn't come off as lecturing as I'm just trying to get you to go easy on yourself. Vape on!

 

[technovapir]

I hope this didn't come off as lecturing as I'm just trying to get you to go easy on yourself. Vape on!

It's all good Tracker.. One of the things I love love love about the ECF forum is how kind and forgiving everyone is. Compared to other "quit smoking" forums I had to join (when my insurance company paid for Chantix-ugh)...I really have learned alot from the opinions and trials of others here. No pressure, no stress.
There are many roads to quitting, and even the "lecturing" here at ECF is given with open hearts & minds and best wishes.

 

[Joyce]

It may be a lecture, but it's good for me, Tracker, and jeffree, and thanks to everyone else, too. The hardest part is, I felt I need to confess here, and somehow like I'd let all of you, the family, down in my own process. I know I didn't have to, but it wouldn't feel right not to.

This is my first real test, and it doesn't feel good to be all that human right now.

 

[keelalagirl55]

The fact that you had a couple and didn't run out to the store to buy a pack is a great accomplishment within itself.

+1

The temptation may always be there...my dad quit when I was about 7...turned to skoal....he just stopped that about 4 months ago....he has an occasional Cigar (never by himself...always in a social setting), but he says that the desire has always been there for him, he just steps away and it's gone. My mom still smokes...so I don't know how he does it when that urge hits....but he did say that the longer he was without, the less often he craved one.

Kudos! It says a lot about you and this V4L family that you came here to admit falling...er more like a tiny stumble...and the outpouring of support everyone is giving.....It is quite heart warming.

This is my first real test, and it doesn't feel good to be all that human right now.

Forgive yourself hon.....look at it as a little pebble that got under your foot and threw you a bit off balance....your back steady on your feet now and no scars

 

[aubergine]

I don't think the cravings ever completely go away.

Careful about generalizations, especially discouraging ones! I was a HEAVY smoker for decades - I have NO cravings and didn't after a very short time. Others do. I sure expected to!
Joyce - think about upping the nic, and consider vaping yourself silly WHEN you get the craving. I absolutely chain-vaped for the first three months, and only wanted an analog when I was nic-deprived, which heavy vaping fixed. But it's different for everyone, in any case; it might help not to think of all this in terms of success and failure, or "tests", but of timely and yummy substitution. My daughter vaped for a couple of months before she stopped smoking altogether; my son-in-law was like me, it was overnight. Feeling bad about yourself etc. just rigs analogs as a taboo, and taboos seem wonderfully enticing by default. Deprivation mentality, self-pressure and self-blaming strategies backfire - we rebel against inner bosses.
No matter what, stuff like this doesn't affect your worth as a person!
Like my old teacher used to say, "Not too loose, not too tight." Good luck!

 

[ThankU4Vaping]

Not to worry, Joyce. You know you're a vaper at heart. That little tobacco fling with the bff? It meant nothing. Really.

 

[aubergine]

And what that post right above says; good mind-set.

 

[pixiedust]

it's really tough to be around a best friend or anyone you have a close relationship who smokes. I don't even think it's the desire for smoking that gets to you, it's the 'rituals' that the two of you established without even thinking about it...Smoking in the car, or when you first get up in the morning. For heaven's sake don't beat yourself up over it! Just get your friend to vape with you =)

 

[AG51]

You can't consider yourself a failure Joyce. After all you're still Vaping !! You haven't given up on that and that's great. You're going to be just fine ♥

 

[keelalagirl55]

I don't even think it's the desire for smoking that gets to you, it's the 'rituals' that the two of you established without even thinking about it

I would have to agree....my toughest is when I take my dogs out....it had always been my "timer" when it was gone it meant it was time to go in....

 

[rtbrjason]

I've slipped and had a few analogs in the last month, mainly at the bar. In the past this would have led me to buying a pack, but with my vaporizer I've no need to do that. I think you're alright to have one here and there without feeling like you're starting over. Think about the thousands you didn't have.