Intellicig Wins Government Approval
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Ah, the Four Yorkshiremen sketch.........folk who are even more abrasive and blunt than us fine citizens from Lancashire next door. I once asked a Yorkshireman what he thought of the comedian who had appeared the night before at the local Working Men's Club, he said, "He wur awreight if tha likes laughin'"!
So, for the uninitiated or the old farts like me who were dragged up by the likes of Monty Python, here it is8-o
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, very passable, that, very passable bit of risotto.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
Nothing like a good glass of Château de Chasselas, eh, Josiah?
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
You're right there, Obadiah.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Who'd have thought thirty year ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Château de Chasselas, eh?
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
In them days we was glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
A cup o' cold tea.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Without milk or sugar.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Or tea.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
In a cracked cup, an' all.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Oh, we never had a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
The best we could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Because we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy you happiness, son".
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, 'e was right.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, 'e was.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
I was happier then and I had nothin'. We used to live in this tiny old house with great big holes in the roof.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
House! You were lucky to live in a house! We used to live in one room, all twenty-six of us, no furniture, 'alf the floor was missing, and we were all 'uddled together in one corner for fear of falling.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Eh, you were lucky to have a room! We used to have to live in t' corridor!
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Oh, we used to dream of livin' in a corridor! Would ha' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woke up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House? Huh.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Well, when I say 'house' it was only a hole in the ground covered by a sheet of tarpaulin, but it was a house to us.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
We were evicted from our 'ole in the ground; we 'ad to go and live in a lake.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
You were lucky to have a lake! There were a hundred and fifty of us living in t' shoebox in t' middle o' road.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Cardboard box?
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
You were lucky. We lived for three months in a paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six in the morning, clean the paper bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down t' mill, fourteen hours a day, week-in week-out, for sixpence a week, and when we got home our Dad would thrash us to sleep wi' his belt.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at six o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of 'ot gravel, work twenty hour day at mill for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would thrash us to sleep with a broken bottle, if we were lucky!
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Well, of course, we had it tough. We used to 'ave to get up out of shoebox at twelve o'clock at night and lick road clean wit' tongue. We had two bits of cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at mill for sixpence every four years, and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two wit' bread knife.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us and dance about on our graves singing Hallelujah.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
And you try and tell the young people of today that ..... they won't believe you.
ALL:
They won't!
.
I've heard of 'six degrees of separation' but we've managed to get from Egypt to Yorkshire in about 2! LOL!
It's the similarities.................
Camels........sheep
Valley of the Kings.........Grimethorpe Colliery
Rainy season............all year
Old Bazaar in Cairo.......Cleckheaton Market
People with beards in long frocks.......Friday night in Dewsbury
The Scirocco tearing across the dessert........Skegness on fire
Great news! Lancashire, Centre of the Vaping World
Blimey,my Grandad came from your neighbourhood!
The similarity to the history of Blackburn and East Lancashire is uncanny.
Blackburn was one of the first towns in the world to be industrialised and was
known as the throne for King Cotton. I remember even into the 1960s looking
across the valley where the centre of town sits and barely being able to see
the other side just a few miles away. At its height almost 80.000 looms thundered
in the weaving sheds of Blackburn's mills, some with almost surreal names
such as Buttertub, Imperial, Owd Gant's, Physic, Unity and not forgetting Roe Lee
where I worked in the mid 1970s as a Tackler (technician). The weaving sheds
were the noisiest places you could imagine with several hundred looms thundering away.
Much of the communication was done by 'meemowing' or lip reading as you could not
hear one another unless shouting in each other's ears! My Grandma was an
ex-weaver and lip read perfectly, especially watching football on TV before
pitchside microphones and tut tutting at the language of the players!
I on the other hand used to wind up the older weavers by standing in their line of speech
and had many a shuttle thrown at me for interrupting their conversation!!
Those towering chimneys belching out smoke from the Lancashire Boilers
and having such an impact on the local landscape were a sight to behold,
although not a pretty one, but when the mills all closed for the wakes weeks
in summer (vacation) it was amazing to be able to see across the valley once more.
Now we live in a smokeless zone, almost all of the mills are long gone and electricity
has replaced coal. Can we do the same and banish tobacco to the history books?
I really do think we can, and maybe someone will write in the future about
th'owden days when you couldn't see the bar for smoke!!
I remember a band called The Pretty Things from the psychadelic '60s who created
a piece that could have been based on my town; here's an extract.
The small town was just under eight miles from everywhere, the grey brickwork soaked up the white sun. The factory of misery lay in the centre, it had been a boom year. From its tall chimneys the factory puffed out large black clouds of its importance that floated above the town. The boom continued. Each morning the workers were sucked from their houses that stood like rows of decaying teeth in long necklaces that were hung around the throats of nearby hills, a new day. It was such a day that a young couple arrived from up North, they moved into number three. The Sorrows, for that was their name, soon settled to the ways of the town, meanwhile the boom continued. Sometime later, during a night when there wasn't a star to be seen, Mrs. Sorrow gave birth to a boy.
John.
Is there any truth in the rumour that Intellicig are developing an e-hookah specifically for the Egyptian market?
Aye, tis all great and all that, but can I vape on top of one of those big four sided triangle shaped thingies in the desert?
And in reference to the Monty Python stuff. Where in the he!! is the spam flavored e juice?
OK I give up. You win.Yes but we're keeping Sheesha bout it!!!
John
I must say that if any company deserves this privelege and ground breaking step forward it should be intellicig, I purchased the black EVO and it works like a charm and the ECOpure and Krystal juices are 110% satisfying! the packaging and look of the product is second to none and the vapour output form these device is huge!
I wish I had started with one of these EVO's because I cannot see myself using anything else now.
Thanks Intellicig and all the best for the future!
Mechanical_Animal
I wish I had started with one of these EVO's because I cannot see myself using anything else now.
Thanks Intellicig and all the best for the future!
Mechanical_Animal
haha thats superb. Such an abstract market too, Egypt? You must have had friends there? Curious how you guys came to focusing this effort on Egypt?
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