If by 501 you mean a branded Joye 510 that's a big part of your problem. These are for those who want a heavy throat hit.
I'm confused as to why it has to look like an analog "so we don't get pulled over while driving"????
Probably so it doesn't look like a pot pipe or something illegal. You can get white 510 batts, attys and carts. The light on the end might be an issue...hate that thing, but it does tell you when it is working properly, or out and needs a charge. And many cops are actually using PVs so the light might be a good thing if they see it.
PG was definitely too harsh for me. I make my own VG juices entirely now, I don't buy flavored juices. I get high-nic VG juice, flavors, VG and thin the juice with about 20% distilled water. TH is dependent on nic content with this juice, so low nic has almost none, high nic is WOW!!