This person says it better than I could.
Was Jesus a Zombie?
Wed, 04/15/2009 - 11:48pm maxx I entered into a most interesting discussion with coworkers debating whether or not Jesus was a zombie. It was more so me trying to convince them that, given the accounts in the bible, Jesus could not be in fact classified as a zombie, at least not in a classical George A. Romero
sense. Without digging too deeply, I will try use this opportunity as a writing exercise to make my case.
For convenience, I will refer to events I understand to be in the bible as fact. I do this not to promote the biblical account as fact, but I figure if you're going to argue whether or not Jesus is a zombie, you might as well, for argument sake, also take the bible as fact--contradictions aside.
Here we go...
Perhaps the biggest evidence to a zombie Jesus proponent is that even after being verified by a Roman soldier as dead (John 19:31-36), Jesus' body is later missing (Mark 16:1-8) and then seen roaming around with his disciples (Mark 16:12-13; Luke 24:13-35) . Yes, this does seem to meet the plain definition of zombie: a reanimated corpse. To stop there, however, does not do the spirit of the concept of the zombie justice. But even so, the bible suggests that what the disciples experienced after Jesus' death could not simply be a reanimated corpse.
One notable characteristic of resurrected Jesus is that he appears very articulate in his posthumous encounters. There are far too many instances to mention. In every instance Jesus conversed with his disciples and was even quite preachy. If that's something you're supposed to attribute to zombies, I'd say that zombies certainly should be feared.
Since Jesus' after-life interaction with his followers seem otherwise quite normal, that squashes another aspect commonly associated with zombies: having flesh-eating, condition spreading tendencies. Jesus shows no sign of this even when appearing to many of his disciples after his death. With all of these accounts of Jesus after his death, none mention Jesus feeding on human flesh, nor do they mention anyone becoming undead from any encounters with him. He did encourage his disciples to eat
his body and drink his blood, but this is before he dies, and clearly is only meant figuratively, as he presents bread as his body and wine as his blood (Mark 14:22-24). Portraits of the Last Supper would look significantly different than they do had this idea been expressed literally. Even if Jesus did literally encourage eating flesh, he was not reported to have done so after his death. Resurrected Jesus does eat, but merely on normal food such as broiled fish (Luke 24:42-43).
Finally, Jesus ascends into heaven leaving no trace except for the stories left by his disciples. A traditional zombie does not just disappear; It takes a shotgun wound to the head, or some other physically debilitating disposition. And even then there's a zombie corpse to deal with. Jesus simply disappears.
So, after considering all of these facts, it is difficult to call Jesus a zombie. It does no justice to either the story of Jesus nor what we commonly consider as zombies.
Was Jesus a Zombie? | Maxx's
