Our hero woke up this morning and apparently the world in fact did end yesterday according to the predictions, because his coffee maker didn’t turn on. Looking outside and not seeing flaming pits of lava cluttered with human souls, he ended up chalking that suspicion to a $8.00 coffee maker from the dollar store and took some puff’s from a 510. Realizing that he killed his second (first… other...) battery late last night and he was going to need it in an hour or so, he screwed it to the charger and plugged the unit into the wall (USB charger to USB wall wart), then proceeded to take a shower.
With-in a mere 5 minutes his cunning mind and sharp skills of reasoning, along with finely tuned senses which even to the most untrained outside observer are clearly rivaled only by that of a brain damaged trilobite. He began to come to the conclusion that there was also a hot water supply problem. Recognizing that the skills of the hot water heater installer were beyond suspect, he checked for cameras to ensure this wasn’t an episode of punked. This was difficult as there seemed to also be a lack of lighting in the shower area. So, getting out of the shower our hero began to trouble shoot the light switch…. It appeared not to be working despite flicking it up and down dozen's of times.
Things began to add up… and he decided to remove his wet and soapy socks before getting dressed and investigating this problem further. I should also probably mention at this time that there may have been alcohol consumed at the home of our hero last night quite possibly having a subtle effect on the cunning mind and sharp reasoning skills of our hero. OK IT WAS ME!!! I ADMIT IT!! Our hero was me… $300 bucks richer from last night’s poker game (after expenses), but still a ......
So I checked the breakers, all were fine, except for the REALLY BIG ONE at the top of the breakers… it was cleverly marked MAIN BREAKER. So… I took all the other breakers off line… and tried it… and it went to “Bite Me” mode. Bad main breaker…. So I called my friend who happens to be an electrician for help (hoping he didn’t remember I have $75 dollars formally known as his). I WAS IN LUCK!!! He had a breaker that would replace mine… for the amazingly coincidental low price of $75 dollars installed…. But he wouldn’t be able to get to my house till later in the evening. DARN!!! No pass-through till later… so I went into “beg mode”
Me: Dude… I don’t have enough charge in my e-cigg till then.
Him: I can’t get there till later, the wife <blah blah>… I can drop it off and you can swap it out yourself before I go with my wife to <blah blah>…
Me: Are you insane… you know how much power is in a panel box?
Him: Yeah… I'm an electrician.
Me: Seriously…. I’m trying not to smoke tobacco and need my e-cigg… can’t you just tell your wife you got to take care of this?
Him: <explicative> you. She'd rip my private areas <sic> and <explicative> on my grave.
Me: Ok then, I'll see you later…. I’m just going to get the grill hot.. and thaw some Omaha T-bone steaks in case you get here early…… bye.
(FYI I buy Omaha steaks with the money I save from tobacco).
Him: Cool <hangs up>
So… to the point of the story…. I rotated my 510 battery’s on a solar USB charger I originally got to charge my iTouch when camping, and got through the day without analogs which I still struggle to resist after 1 month of vaping (even at $9 a pack). The solar USB Charger a hero, I highly recommend everyone have one around. I got mine for about 10 bucks (shipped from dinodirect dot com) it has a 1500mah bat but I am considering a bigger/newer one now (it has a led flashlight).
Oh and then… my electrician shows up…. And the story ends like this:
Me: Thanks for doing this on a Sunday <blah blah blah>. Sure here's your money!!!
Him: Not a problem… Hey are those Steaks??? I’ll switch the breaker while you cook those….
Me: Cool!!
<Time passes><We snack on some T-bones under the non-romantic incandescent lighting of my kitchen>
Him: Hey…. Why didn’t you just hook up those smoke things to your laptop, the kids were watching DVD’s on them anyway? And you still always have 3 charged battery's on that charging station from your work don’t you?
Me: <30 seconds of explicative statements> Yeah…. I wonder why I didn’t think about that.
With-in a mere 5 minutes his cunning mind and sharp skills of reasoning, along with finely tuned senses which even to the most untrained outside observer are clearly rivaled only by that of a brain damaged trilobite. He began to come to the conclusion that there was also a hot water supply problem. Recognizing that the skills of the hot water heater installer were beyond suspect, he checked for cameras to ensure this wasn’t an episode of punked. This was difficult as there seemed to also be a lack of lighting in the shower area. So, getting out of the shower our hero began to trouble shoot the light switch…. It appeared not to be working despite flicking it up and down dozen's of times.
Things began to add up… and he decided to remove his wet and soapy socks before getting dressed and investigating this problem further. I should also probably mention at this time that there may have been alcohol consumed at the home of our hero last night quite possibly having a subtle effect on the cunning mind and sharp reasoning skills of our hero. OK IT WAS ME!!! I ADMIT IT!! Our hero was me… $300 bucks richer from last night’s poker game (after expenses), but still a ......
So I checked the breakers, all were fine, except for the REALLY BIG ONE at the top of the breakers… it was cleverly marked MAIN BREAKER. So… I took all the other breakers off line… and tried it… and it went to “Bite Me” mode. Bad main breaker…. So I called my friend who happens to be an electrician for help (hoping he didn’t remember I have $75 dollars formally known as his). I WAS IN LUCK!!! He had a breaker that would replace mine… for the amazingly coincidental low price of $75 dollars installed…. But he wouldn’t be able to get to my house till later in the evening. DARN!!! No pass-through till later… so I went into “beg mode”
Me: Dude… I don’t have enough charge in my e-cigg till then.
Him: I can’t get there till later, the wife <blah blah>… I can drop it off and you can swap it out yourself before I go with my wife to <blah blah>…
Me: Are you insane… you know how much power is in a panel box?
Him: Yeah… I'm an electrician.
Me: Seriously…. I’m trying not to smoke tobacco and need my e-cigg… can’t you just tell your wife you got to take care of this?
Him: <explicative> you. She'd rip my private areas <sic> and <explicative> on my grave.
Me: Ok then, I'll see you later…. I’m just going to get the grill hot.. and thaw some Omaha T-bone steaks in case you get here early…… bye.
(FYI I buy Omaha steaks with the money I save from tobacco).
Him: Cool <hangs up>
So… to the point of the story…. I rotated my 510 battery’s on a solar USB charger I originally got to charge my iTouch when camping, and got through the day without analogs which I still struggle to resist after 1 month of vaping (even at $9 a pack). The solar USB Charger a hero, I highly recommend everyone have one around. I got mine for about 10 bucks (shipped from dinodirect dot com) it has a 1500mah bat but I am considering a bigger/newer one now (it has a led flashlight).
Oh and then… my electrician shows up…. And the story ends like this:
Me: Thanks for doing this on a Sunday <blah blah blah>. Sure here's your money!!!
Him: Not a problem… Hey are those Steaks??? I’ll switch the breaker while you cook those….
Me: Cool!!
<Time passes><We snack on some T-bones under the non-romantic incandescent lighting of my kitchen>
Him: Hey…. Why didn’t you just hook up those smoke things to your laptop, the kids were watching DVD’s on them anyway? And you still always have 3 charged battery's on that charging station from your work don’t you?
Me: <30 seconds of explicative statements> Yeah…. I wonder why I didn’t think about that.
