Just trying to help even though I know absolutely nothing about the situation. Feel like a jackass for not realizing home was so far away for her.
a test of my stength and willpower
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Don't feel bad Trish, she knows you're trying to help, as do we all. It's wonderful of you to be trying to look out for her. That's why I love this forum.
the visiting hours for ccu are very limited. we get 4-20min visits for the whole day. i understand why they do this - they cant have friends and family in the way all day and if a patient is in ccu the person usually needs to not be disturbed. luckily , they make exceptions based on the patient. hes there be cause hes still in danger but hes conscious and im the only family member. for him the personal contact is better instead of making him worse. if i leave the ccu floor, i cant go back til the next time slot but they will let me stay as long as i want.
i told his nurse last night that the ccu waiting room attendant wanted me to stand in line and wait for a recliner to open (i walk with a cane) and that there were large families using them. she said "nooo, no. i will call and get u a place to sleep." she started to suggest a hotel but i told her i would stay in my hubbys rented room (i live 2.5 hrs away but the hubby rents a room to live in since hes working here). the prob is its 20-30 min away depending on traffic. there are only 2 hc parking slots at each floor in the structure. there are so many ppl that not only are the hc slot taken but there arent any regular parking spots open either. i have a coveted hc slot (no parking spot on my drivers side so i can open my door all the way) on the 1st floor. i dont want to get a call saying i need to get back here right away then not be able to park. i cant be in a position to not be here if something happens to him (god forbid). maybe once they move to a regular room i might be willing to leave for a while but not ready for that yet.
i know i sound compulsive and controlling in this situation but last summer we were in a similar position except his job was in san antonio tx that time. no heart attack but close. they put in his first 2 stints after bring rushed to the er. they almost decided to do bypass surgery. i couldnt be there for it. 16 hr drive with my bad back and hips. i would have done the trip is they had decided to dp the bypass surgery but he wouldnt let me for the stints. he was living with my cousin at the time. she was there so he wasnt alone. so im determined to be here for everything this time. i actually got sleep last night... 1 hr the 1st night, 5 hrs last night AND I GOT A SHOWER!!! i feel like a real person again... not a walking stinky slime ball.
im very glad to have everyone here to boost me up and keep me from falling back on old smoking habits. it would be easy to do but you have given me lots of support, encouragment, and good.ideas about how to help him, help himself... nothing like feeling out of control of your own life to make you think "choosing" to smoke means you are in control of it (instead of it controlling you".
i told his nurse last night that the ccu waiting room attendant wanted me to stand in line and wait for a recliner to open (i walk with a cane) and that there were large families using them. she said "nooo, no. i will call and get u a place to sleep." she started to suggest a hotel but i told her i would stay in my hubbys rented room (i live 2.5 hrs away but the hubby rents a room to live in since hes working here). the prob is its 20-30 min away depending on traffic. there are only 2 hc parking slots at each floor in the structure. there are so many ppl that not only are the hc slot taken but there arent any regular parking spots open either. i have a coveted hc slot (no parking spot on my drivers side so i can open my door all the way) on the 1st floor. i dont want to get a call saying i need to get back here right away then not be able to park. i cant be in a position to not be here if something happens to him (god forbid). maybe once they move to a regular room i might be willing to leave for a while but not ready for that yet.
i know i sound compulsive and controlling in this situation but last summer we were in a similar position except his job was in san antonio tx that time. no heart attack but close. they put in his first 2 stints after bring rushed to the er. they almost decided to do bypass surgery. i couldnt be there for it. 16 hr drive with my bad back and hips. i would have done the trip is they had decided to dp the bypass surgery but he wouldnt let me for the stints. he was living with my cousin at the time. she was there so he wasnt alone. so im determined to be here for everything this time. i actually got sleep last night... 1 hr the 1st night, 5 hrs last night AND I GOT A SHOWER!!! i feel like a real person again... not a walking stinky slime ball.
im very glad to have everyone here to boost me up and keep me from falling back on old smoking habits. it would be easy to do but you have given me lots of support, encouragment, and good.ideas about how to help him, help himself... nothing like feeling out of control of your own life to make you think "choosing" to smoke means you are in control of it (instead of it controlling you".
Thanks for the pm Caligirl, you made me laugh at myself. If staying makes you feel better, do so. Its amazing how something as simple as having a shower can totally rejuvenate you. Now, how are you going to keep yourself entertained inbetween the short visits? Do you have a tablet pc you can bring with you? This may be a good time to pick up that novel you never had time to read.....
in between hanging out with my hubby, ive been reading and posting to the forum via my phone which means i go for periods of not replying because i have to charge my phone a couple times a day and i brought my crocheting with me. i also spend time just sitting in my truck with the ac blowing at my face chain vaping. ive gone through about 8ml in 2.5 days!
I'm surprised to see so many people have already mentioned WTA juices. I use them as well, from Aroma E-juice Whole Tobacco Alkaloid WTA Eliquid Ejuice There's several different sections on the website, one for WTA e-liquids, one for regular e-liquids, and one for high VG e-liquids. Jerry's really good about shipping, and it's usually 3 days from order to delivery. They have a reputation for lightning quick processing.
WTA isn't the holy grail of vaping, but it does provide more than just the nicotine that regular e-liquids do and really helps with the chain vaping and cig cravings. You might want to talk to the staff at the hospital, many hospitals allow vaping. Being able to do it openly would drop you stress level down a bit, I would imagine.
Best of luck to both you and your husband. My prayers are going out for you guys.
WTA isn't the holy grail of vaping, but it does provide more than just the nicotine that regular e-liquids do and really helps with the chain vaping and cig cravings. You might want to talk to the staff at the hospital, many hospitals allow vaping. Being able to do it openly would drop you stress level down a bit, I would imagine.
Best of luck to both you and your husband. My prayers are going out for you guys.
I read or saw somewhere that, on the average, cigarette smoking takes 14 years off of your life. That is pretty sobering.
O' Cali-
So sorry I was not on ECF to hear of your hubby's troubles...
I am thinking of you both- and sending out 'Good Vibrations' your way.
There are many of us here on ECF that want to see you stay strong....
it would be so easy to get a pack of ciggies...but you're not a smoker anymore...
you're a Vaper !
So-Vape, Vape, Vape away....
and stay on ECF...cause you have our support here !
Be Strong !
So sorry I was not on ECF to hear of your hubby's troubles...
I am thinking of you both- and sending out 'Good Vibrations' your way.
There are many of us here on ECF that want to see you stay strong....
it would be so easy to get a pack of ciggies...but you're not a smoker anymore...
you're a Vaper !
So-Vape, Vape, Vape away....
and stay on ECF...cause you have our support here !
Be Strong !
For some reason I had a feeling you were a knitter. Maybe a crotcheted PV case?
I'm kinda new around here. I've been following this thread since it started. But it hits home for me, so I haven't posted.
I just wanted to say, I admire you. your strength, loyalty, and commitment to your husband. Not everyone is like you. Your story has brought tears to my eyes, and hope in my heart for your husband.
Sending my prays and good vibes for continued strength and health.
I just wanted to say, I admire you. your strength, loyalty, and commitment to your husband. Not everyone is like you. Your story has brought tears to my eyes, and hope in my heart for your husband.
Sending my prays and good vibes for continued strength and health.
caligirl....you can do this. my heart goes out to you and your hubby. you are stronger than you think you are....we all are. you've got this girl! keep vaping....and thanks for the updates...as you can see we are the cheerleaders for you both!
sorry i hadnt posted an update yet... its been a busy day.
first, i want to say THANK YOU TO EVERYONE!!! i really appreciate all the prayers, well wishes, cheerleading, and teary eyes. ive gone through all of those same emotions over the past few days and im very grateful to my virtual family for going through this with us. the whole time ive felt so lucky that things fell into place the way they did... instead of taking a nap and not waking up, he knew the fatigue was something serious and went to the er; the first hospital was going to just keep him over night until a cardiologist was available but decided to send him to a hospital with the appropriate staff when on the way he started the heart attack; my son replaced the starter in my only vehicle and it started with the first turn of the key right after my hubby got to the er; i drove 2.5 hrs through 4 major road constuctions (2 down to 1 lane for 5+ miles rach) and through a usually very busy nashville-none of which slowed me down i had smooth sailing the whole way (the other side of the highway was a parking lot in most places). someone was watching out for us.
yesterday afternoon we were told the vtach events had stopped and moved him to a room in the cardiac section. i was finally able to stay in the room with him. the foldout chair was completely uncomfortable but with 5 pillows and being in the room with him, i didnt care. we spent some of the timr talking about the changes that need to be made to get him well and keep this from happening again. onr of which being... no more cigarettes. hes dedicated to using his ecig and we are going to try the WTA juice (thanks so much for that suggestion). until i was able to be in the room with him, it was very difficult to not smoke. eventhough its a non smoking campus, the smokers were still going to the parking structure or in their cars to smoke which meant every time i went out i had to smell it until i got in my truck with the windows closed. but i immediately plugged in my phone to charge, got on ECF, and read all your encouragements. this kept me true to what i really wanted... no smoking.
the echo shows his heart is only functioning half of normal heart function. he will be wearing a defibrillator vest for a while. she will check function again after a month. if function is above 75% then he wont need the vest any more. if its still the same he will have an internal defibrillator inserted to jump start his heart when needed. overall hes feeling much better. hes got some medication changes including reducing his bp meds since the blood flow is back.
we both know how lucky he is. he could have very easily gone to sleep for a nap and not have woken up. its going to be alot of work but its all worth it to still have him here with me. im so glad we have the ecigs to use because each time we have tried to quit before even after scares (not quite as bad as this) nothing has worked. i really believe it will this time. i dont know what we would do if ecigs and the nic juice werent available to us.
first, i want to say THANK YOU TO EVERYONE!!! i really appreciate all the prayers, well wishes, cheerleading, and teary eyes. ive gone through all of those same emotions over the past few days and im very grateful to my virtual family for going through this with us. the whole time ive felt so lucky that things fell into place the way they did... instead of taking a nap and not waking up, he knew the fatigue was something serious and went to the er; the first hospital was going to just keep him over night until a cardiologist was available but decided to send him to a hospital with the appropriate staff when on the way he started the heart attack; my son replaced the starter in my only vehicle and it started with the first turn of the key right after my hubby got to the er; i drove 2.5 hrs through 4 major road constuctions (2 down to 1 lane for 5+ miles rach) and through a usually very busy nashville-none of which slowed me down i had smooth sailing the whole way (the other side of the highway was a parking lot in most places). someone was watching out for us.
yesterday afternoon we were told the vtach events had stopped and moved him to a room in the cardiac section. i was finally able to stay in the room with him. the foldout chair was completely uncomfortable but with 5 pillows and being in the room with him, i didnt care. we spent some of the timr talking about the changes that need to be made to get him well and keep this from happening again. onr of which being... no more cigarettes. hes dedicated to using his ecig and we are going to try the WTA juice (thanks so much for that suggestion). until i was able to be in the room with him, it was very difficult to not smoke. eventhough its a non smoking campus, the smokers were still going to the parking structure or in their cars to smoke which meant every time i went out i had to smell it until i got in my truck with the windows closed. but i immediately plugged in my phone to charge, got on ECF, and read all your encouragements. this kept me true to what i really wanted... no smoking.
the echo shows his heart is only functioning half of normal heart function. he will be wearing a defibrillator vest for a while. she will check function again after a month. if function is above 75% then he wont need the vest any more. if its still the same he will have an internal defibrillator inserted to jump start his heart when needed. overall hes feeling much better. hes got some medication changes including reducing his bp meds since the blood flow is back.
we both know how lucky he is. he could have very easily gone to sleep for a nap and not have woken up. its going to be alot of work but its all worth it to still have him here with me. im so glad we have the ecigs to use because each time we have tried to quit before even after scares (not quite as bad as this) nothing has worked. i really believe it will this time. i dont know what we would do if ecigs and the nic juice werent available to us.
thanks so much. things happen for a reason....he didn't nap, he was in medical care when the heart attack came, etc. yes, i believe you will both be successful vapers. my best to you both.
I wish him the best, I feel great sadness hearing stories like yours. My parents are heavy smokers, I fear someday it will catch up to them. I've been smoke free for a month thanks to my 510-T and Ego. Of course its still been hard not to smoke, but I push through everyday and just continue vapping. Cigarettes are becoming more and more distant in my mind with each day. I'm going to let my parents borrow some of my vape gear and try to get them to quite smoking. I wish both of you the best and hang in there
i have been smoke free for 2 months. i quit when i started using my ecig. until this week i hadnt craved cigarettes at all. they smell terrible and taste worse (ive lit a few for my hubby) so i was surprised when this situation started a craving. ive had stress during those 2 months although, needless to say, this is my worst stressful time that i can think of in most of my life. but i really didnt expect the lack of cravings to change. im glad to say i made it through without lighting up... my hubby did too. after we got home today he snuck off to the garage. i went to look for him hoping my presence would be enough to make him think twice before smoking. before i got my jacket on he walked back in the room. he didnt smell like it so i figured he was just putting something away. i asked later if he had a smoke. he said he lit one (i was surprised he told me) and it tasted horrid so he put it out. he agreed it probably wasnt a good idea to keep "trying" it brcause eventually he would be desensitized to the tasted. im hoping he got that part out of his mind now (thinking he was missing out on something.
aside from that, so far so good with the drs instuctions... hes checked his sugar and blood pressure, walked for 30 min, paid attention to the fat and carb content in his food, got all his scripts filled and took all the meds. hes off to a great start and ive been sure to tell him how proud i am of him. its so easy to give up on the hard changes to made even if its your life thats in danger. it goes way beyond willpower. its more about believing in yourself and realizing that you are worthy of the extra time youve been given.
aside from that, so far so good with the drs instuctions... hes checked his sugar and blood pressure, walked for 30 min, paid attention to the fat and carb content in his food, got all his scripts filled and took all the meds. hes off to a great start and ive been sure to tell him how proud i am of him. its so easy to give up on the hard changes to made even if its your life thats in danger. it goes way beyond willpower. its more about believing in yourself and realizing that you are worthy of the extra time youve been given.
Glad to hear he's home again. Hospitals are no place to recover. You have a lot of challenges ahead of you, but I think its amazing that yourej concentrating on what went right, and not dwelling on the bad. That attitude will see you through the worst. And yes, the is Somethiing watching over all of us. We just have to let Him in.
I wish him the best, I feel great sadness hearing stories like yours. My parents are heavy smokers, I fear someday it will catch up to them. I've been smoke free for a month thanks to my 510-T and Ego. Of course its still been hard not to smoke, but I push through everyday and just continue vapping. Cigarettes are becoming more and more distant in my mind with each day. I'm going to let my parents borrow some of my vape gear and try to get them to quite smoking. I wish both of you the best and hang in there
congrats to you. best of luck with getting your parents off the stinkies.
hope you are still doing well. this was all the way back on page 10....but wanted to check in and see how things are going.
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