I have vaped on and off for about a year but just got serious in the last month and a half. The first 2 weeks I only smoked 4 packs then I got stressed out with family problems and started smoking more analogs. I would love to vape only but I feel more secure if I have my analogs. I have thought about not buying analogs but I have not reached that point yet. I can't even go out of the house without them. Will I ever be secure enough to leave analogs alone? How do I ever get to the point of just wanting to vape? I have smoked for 34 years and I vape 24 mg. Would someone please help me!
I got lucky and hit the right device for me and the right juice my first try. People will laugh and groan, but I talked to the guy at my smoke shop, who turned out to be a vaper. I went with the Blu. I'm branching out now, but for me, these devices look right, feel right, give me the big cloud without the hacking cough. They're simple, hassle-free, and easy to refill. I also go with non-tobacco flavors. I choose flavors that I know I love. Chai. Lemon desserts. Fruits. I can't have PG, and there's no VG only in the stores here. All my juices have to come from the net. I found a maker,
Highbrow Vapor, I trust that uses ingredients I trust.
I tried everything to quit, and everyone knew it. Smoking gave me emphysema at 38 and jacked-up heart valves at 42. I couldn't even quit after my dad's smoking-specific lung cancer. For the last 15 years, I'd been through two rounds of six-week classes put on by a local hospital. Hypnosis. Patches I ended up being allergic to. Nicotine replacement lozenges and gums. Nicotrol inhalers. Doctors telling me while under the knife during several surgeries that when I woke up I would no longer be a smoker. Chantix, which I toughed out for five weeks of crazy dreams and bizarre thoughts, until I "woke up" one night to my dog barking at me while I was getting into the car to go run myself off the bridge and into the river. (There was no plan. I didn't remember dressing, getting keys, thought process, plan, anything. Was total autopilot.) Candy. Lots of water. Food.
As for stress, that's what caused me to almost go back to analogs. The same weekend I started vaping, my family situation simultaneously imploded and exploded. I won't go into all the details, but for about three weeks I was under constant attack by a few members. I had to really crawl into my brain and heart to figure out what they were triggering and why I was reacting with wanting to smoke. Turned out they were triggering the "you don't deserve to exist" tape and I was reacting to that message with the one thing that would kill me. I removed them, and haven't looked back. Haven't thought about a smoke, either.
Support is key, Gena. If no one you know is vaping, then look on the web or facebook, or here, for vaping groups in your area. There are a couple where I live and they have monthly meet-ups. Like I said before, everyone knew the fight I'd had with smoking. Social media proved invaluable. I used the data from
sincemylastcigarette.com to post updates to friends and family. I overkilled it at first, but now just post it for milestones. It was wild to watch the number of cigarettes avoided rise. Had no idea how many I smoked in a month or week. The response was overwhelming, and gave me good messages to go back and look at if I needed a boost. In fact, it's even inspired a couple of my friends to step into this world.
Don't forget self-support. You have to support yourself, too. For me, that comes in the form of noticing and enjoying the little things. For example, I'm only able to wash my hair every three days, so it happened that my first wash was two days after vaping. I woke up the next morning to the smell of conditioner and couldn't figure out where it came from. It was my own hair on the pillow. I noticed that my dog stopped smelling weird. I go through fewer furnace filters. I open the drawers and am hit with fabric softener still working after a month. I wash my hands and notice that hours later they still smell like soap. Even my sweat smells better. I sleep so well now. I'm never out of breath. My doctor is amazed. Every tiny thing is a massive victory.
You can do it, Gena. It's cliché, but my case true: If I can do it, then anyone can. Find a device you like. Find a juice you like. Find flavors you like. Support yourself and seek out the support of others. Find your triggers and remove them, even if they're people. You're trying to rid your body of poison, and you won't if you don't rid your life of poison, too.
