Encourage or Discourage Nachos?

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Thucydides

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I'm an addict. And I am addicted to nachos. Studies show that eating copious amounts of nachos has a profound neurological impact on all organisms with a taste for ersatz Tex-Mex. Plus, nachos makes you fat and ugly and give you heart disease. In spite of the obvious risks of being fat and ugly and getting heart disease, I cannot stop eating nachos.

Anyway, nachos were making me fat and ugly and giving me heart disease, so I switched to low-calorie chips with low-fat cheese so that I can remain healthy in spite of my pathetic addiction, which fills me with such shame that I cannot help but declare, "I'm an addict!" whenever anyone talks about nachos.

Now a friend of mine is interested in trying my low-fat, low-calorie nachos, and I'm faced with the most profound moral dilemma that I've ever faced in my life as an addict. Should I encourage it or discourage it?

Keep in mind, this person is an adult, and has never eaten nachos in her life. What's more, my friend is healthy and is neither fat nor ugly.

For my part, I feel fine eating my low-calorie Nachos, because it's a replacement for the high-calorie Nachos that was making me fat and ugly and giving me heart disease. But what about a person who's never had nachos? Nachos just aren't natural. Shouldn't she avoid it altogether?

I just don't know. I wish eating low-calorie nachos would make me just as wise as it does healthy.
 
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Iffy

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Golf clap... <snicker>
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d9mel

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After knowing the Ill side effects of nacho consumption you'd think your friend would realize that its easier to avoid them all together. You've altered your addiction to low calorie nachos, which is a big step, but one that could have been avoided if you had stayed away from greasy artery clogging nachos in the first place. I say educate your friend, but in the end they're an adult and can make they're own poor decisions.
Good luck
 

Trick

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This is all going to be a moot point in another few months when the FDA rules that nachos aren't actually a food, and stops regulating them.

I hate to be fatalistic about it, but can you imagine what nachos are going to be like without the government there to hold our hands as we eat them? You're going to see an exponential jump in the use of pasteurized processed cheese products, rampant oversalting, and if you think it's hard to find decent jalapenos now, you just wait.

I, for one, am stocking up on Velveeta and black olives now, before all hell breaks loose.
 
I'm an Anti-Nacho and Tabasco Zealot and I'm here to tell you it's YOUR fault you started this habit in the first place and YOU should just go COLD TURKEY. If you get a disease from your nachos, don't expect ME to pay for your health care.

Sorry for the delay there, the fourteen hot dogs I'm making for a midnight snack were finished. Anyway.

Your low-fat nachos ARE NOT HELPING YOU and the flavors ARE ATTRACTIVE TO CHILDREN. Won't SOMEBODY think of the CHILDREN?

Sorry for that second delay, I was adding ketchup to my hot dogs.

You NEED to QUIT all fats NOW.
 
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