Found wife is cheating, no not on me :)
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I would totally tell her you found them. It's a cigarette. It is not like you found out she is planning on offing you in your sleep or something.
This is far from the end of the world. If she needs a smoke every now and then, so be it.
Just don't be judgmental. If you are judgemental, you affirm her belief to keep it hidden from you. Be supportive and helpful if you can.
This is far from the end of the world. If she needs a smoke every now and then, so be it.
Just don't be judgmental. If you are judgemental, you affirm her belief to keep it hidden from you. Be supportive and helpful if you can.
Or he could just walk around with a fire extinguisher on his person. And follow her around the house. But don't explain why, just be a little creepy about it and see where it leads.
not likely, I agree
(although I caught one of mine at about 13,,,,,,,,11 is just a bit too young to have a whole pack)
I started smoking at 12....this is after picking up my dads discarded butts at 11 and toking on them.....never say never
Guess I will find out in a few hours, but as they are the same brand me and the wife use to smoke and is one of her old lighters, I'm 99% sure they are the wife's.
This. Give her a hug, tell her you understand, don't be disappointed and move on. But I think you have to talk to her about it, otherwise you'll just be trying to 'catch' her and that may cause more problems than it solves.
One cigarette doesn't mean she fell off the wagon. It just means she has smoked 1,999 fewer cigarettes than she would have, instead of 2,000 fewer.
Well, since you found the smokes in an open spot (maybe not as she intended but you did) then it's not like you were nosing through her stuff & found them. So then, mentioning you found them & reassuring her that she doesn't need to sneak to smoke might make both of you feel better.
Of course I can understand why you'd be disappointed that she started as well as being disappointed that she didn't tell you. But it might be that she simply bought a pack just because she missed it a little & wanted to have just 1 & she wasn't really "unhappy" or unsatisfied with vaping at all. Or maybe she feels a little ashamed that she's not as zealous about it as you are & that she still wants to have a cigarette so she doesn't feel good about talking about it. Maybe she just needs to be reminded that that's ok.
I certainly don't think it would hurt to suggest increasing her nic level on her juice either.
Of course I can understand why you'd be disappointed that she started as well as being disappointed that she didn't tell you. But it might be that she simply bought a pack just because she missed it a little & wanted to have just 1 & she wasn't really "unhappy" or unsatisfied with vaping at all. Or maybe she feels a little ashamed that she's not as zealous about it as you are & that she still wants to have a cigarette so she doesn't feel good about talking about it. Maybe she just needs to be reminded that that's ok.
I certainly don't think it would hurt to suggest increasing her nic level on her juice either.
11 is NOT too young for someone to start smoking..........
Tell your wife you found the smokes and you're concerned that the 11 year old is smoking
If your wife admits to smoking, just be chill, her choice, her life, but she doesn't need to hide it from you. Suggest the higher nic, but it's going to be all up to her.
Tell your wife you found the smokes and you're concerned that the 11 year old is smoking
If your wife admits to smoking, just be chill, her choice, her life, but she doesn't need to hide it from you. Suggest the higher nic, but it's going to be all up to her.
Honestly I feel like he is already being judgmental and creepy about it. He checked to see how many cigs were missing? He checked them closely enough to see if they are fresh? The title of his thread?
I suggested not ever mentioning the cigs because the wife is going to pick up on just how closely he is checking up on her no matter what his good intentions are.
TO each their own. Advice is to be taken or ignored as the one receiving it sees best.
I agree that 11 isn't too young to smoke,,,,,,,,but it's less likely that an 11 year old has a NEW pack of smokes,,,,,they usually have singles,,,,,or ragged packs
if she has a new pack SOMEONE is buying them FOR her,,,,,,,I'd also not be sneaky,,,,,,,,it just perpetuates the sneakiness,,,,,,,,just being honest without being judgmental sets the tone.
I agree that 11 isn't too young to smoke,,,,,,,,but it's less likely that an 11 year old has a NEW pack of smokes,,,,,they usually have singles,,,,,or ragged packs
I'd also not be sneaky,,,,,,,,it just perpetuates the sneakiness,,,,,,,,just being honest without being judgmental sets the tone.
11 year olds are capable of a lot more than we think, and regardless, I'd find out who's pack they were. I was smoking something else a week after my 12th birthday. I could get beer at 11 if I had wanted. My daughter was having sex at 12. Age means nothing, single smoke or a pack, nothing stops a kid when they're determined. I'd say "Cover Your ...".
Put them back and not mention it. It was one cigarette and you don't know how much of it she actually smoked. She could have very well have had a moment of weakness, bought a pack, took two puffs and put it out, and she's over it. None of us are perfect.
So opening the pack and checking to see if it was fresh, even just confirming a suspicion, is creepy? Perhaps if he had found none missing or that they were old as dirt... he wouldn't even feel the need to address it? I'm all about trust and privacy in a marriage but it's not like the guy installed a typing logger on her PC or caught her on a hidden camera. Quit being so dramatic about it.
He knew everything he needed to know when he found an open pack. Anything else was being nosey and pushing it. I personally would be ...... to high H that he felt the need to be that nosey.
How about you quit trying to exaggerate what I said into drama.
Thank you, didn't think myself as creepy, I didn't even know if there was cigs in the pack, and didn't know if it was a old pack that had been forgotten, so yes check how fresh they was, if they was really dry, then would of thought no more about it and thrown them away, but as fresh I now have to come clean I found them.
We are married, not room mates, she goes in my wallet, goes on my computer, uses my phone, to me not nosey in marriage.
Things aren't that black and white. Sorry. Apparently we have different ideas of what is being "nosey" and what isn't and that's fine. Agree to disagree, and move on.
Todd
Start burying money in your yard. When the wife asks about it, bring up the missing cigarette discovery.
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