Women only understand force, so you have to play the bad boy with her (it's the eternal irony of women, they say they want us to be nice yet are always attracted to the douches who aren't nice). When I started vaping, I told my wife she should switch to vaping. She said "No, I'll keep smoking." So I installed a trip wire on the stairs that night and in the morning, she fell down them. It was good fall to because our stairs have two bends in them and she bounce off the corners like a pinball! I said "See, told ya you should vape. Now look what happened." So she got up all crying, went into the kitchen and spit in my eggs while she mixed in cig ashes into them. They tasted like crapola. After breakfast I said "You gonna take up vaping and quit smoking?" She said "No" so I cut the brake lines on her car. She ended up going down the hill we live on uncontrollably right into the hog farm pond at the bottom of the hill. She stumbled home covered in mud and pig poop and I said "Gonna try vaping now?" She said "No" and made me a Chocolate cream pie made out of Exlax. It took me about 6 days to stop having uncontrollable ........ but when I did, I slept with her sister. She walked in and was all crying and blubbering "How could you? You are a jerk!" I said, "I didn't want to do it baby, but I just want what's best for you so I had to go bad boy on you. Now will you take up vaping" She finally acquiesced and now enjoys vaping.
Sorry but I ain't buyin' your story. Anybody knows an Exlax pie is good for over a week and after that you could not possibly had the strength to jump her sis's bones.