God does have a sense of humor

[AngelsBreath]

I know, when my friend told me about it I absolutely rolled with laughter. Do you think that maybe it's a language barrier? hahahahahahaha I don't think we here in the South are as redneck as the Northerners seem to think we are and I'm fully convinced that the people up North are not nearly as stuck up as we Southerners think they are It's just a language barrier, that's all lmao.

 

[Robino1]

Hubby is a born and bred city boy. I grew up mostly in the country. I like walking nature trails, he tolerates it.
Yesterday we go exploring our new area in Florida and are walking the Oxbow Eco center after a talk with one of the people and have learned of the wildlife we probably won't encounter because we are out in the heat of the day.

Well hubby is nervous and a little edgy thinking he may run into a bobcat, alligator, snake and other creatures while on our walk. At one point we hear a loud rustling right next to us and hubby jumps and says "Stay, ven aqui!" Then calmly says "I hope they don't speak Spanish, I just told them to come here".

I lost it! I laughed so long, I'm sure I scared any dangerous creatures away. God I love that man of mine.

 

[AngelsBreath]

ROFLMAO that was too funny Bwahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

 

[Mud Pie]

When I first got out of the military and moved to Texas (born and bred Long Island boy), I got a job as a Security Officer. The building to which I was assigned was on the edge of a large wooded area. Various animals were always on property. The property had a walking/jogging trail for the employees.

One Sunday a male tenant in jogging clothes came in the office and announced, "I was just jogging along the trail and saw this HUGE snake sunning itself. All of a sudden I heard this loud BOOM." Curious, I asked what was the boom. He just says, "My butthole slamming shut."

I never laughed so hard.

 

[AngelsBreath]

hahahahahahahahahaha, now that's funny!!!

 

[BostLabs]

Growing up in the country in Oklahoma I had many an encounter with critters. If it lives in Okla I've probably come across it.

So while in the Marine Corps (Camp Pendleton, CA) I had a week of guard duty (not as a punishment, this was a standard rotation). For the most part it was boring... I'm sorry, that's not quite right. It was BORRRRRRRRIIIING!

One night I'm guarding an area around the motor pool, armed only with a flashlight and a night stick, and am walking toward a hut that had several cans next to it. Suddenly there is a clang and I snap my flashlight on and pin two Raccoons with the light. Of all things to happen they rush me (very unusual for Raccoons, from my experience, to do.

So later, as I'm telling the tale to one of my squad members who is a city boy, he asks me, with big round eyes, "What did you do then, run?"
I said, in my best Okie twang, "Heck no! I let them get within 5 feet of me then whip out my stick and swipe it at them and stomp my foot while yelling Heya! Git! And they got!" LOL! Silly city boy, like I'm gonna let a critter get the best of of me.

I have another story that involved 3 Marines (one is me), a small bat on a Friday evening in the barracks. It is amazing how silly city boys can be. LOL.

 

[daleron]

I have another story that involved 3 Marines (one is me), a small bat on a Friday evening in the barracks. It is amazing how silly city boys can be. LOL.

Do tell BostLabs!!!!

 

[daleron]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Good thing I quit smoking so I can laugh so long.

ROFL That was a good one Angel! I didn't see that one coming

 

[AngelsBreath]

Okay so...cow tipping? Anyone? Or maybe the elusive snipe hunting? Hmmmmm lmao

In the south, in the country, we make our own fun roflmao!!

 

[BostLabs]

Ok the bat story.

Same base and company. A Friday evening and all of the company is on liberty call (off work so to speak). I'm in the barracks in my 4 man room and I'm hanging out because I have a fire watch duty coming up in a few hours so I didn't see any need to run to town just to come running back for the duty.

In my room is a city boy who is restricted to base because he kept going UA (Unauthorized Absence. The USMC kinda frowns on that) so he can't go anywhere so we are watching TV when we hear this scream (kinda like a girl (no offense ladies)). It came from the NCO's room (Non Commissioned Officer - That would be Corporal on up).

So me and the city boy charge into the room (hey that's what Marines do) and see the Corporal running around the room chasing a bat (slightly bigger than my hand with its wings spread) and he is waving his hands over his head trying to keep the bat out of his hair.

Marines, have pretty much, no hair so I found this quite amusing.

So my room mate starts helping him chase the bat. They are intent on killing the poor thing. Me, I'm standing still watching them run back and forth waving a baseball bat (that the Corporal grabbed from somewhere) trying to smack the bat (trying to bat the bat. Now that's funny).

So they charge by me once, twice, three times then I calmly raise my hand, palm open, and wait. The bat comes flying by (probably scared as all get out) and I swat it out of the air to the floor stunning it.

"Great! Kill it!" says the Corporal. "Like hell I will!" (oooh disobeying an order ) I bend over and pick up the bat (kinda cute looking IMHO) by its wing tips and carry it outside. Followed closely behind by the two city boys ready to kill the big bad bat. (LOL) I give the poor critter a little toss and he quickly leaves the area.

Turns out the bat had entered the room through the open window (barracks don't have screens). It was probably chasing a bug and the bug went into the room.

I swear, when they were running back and forth in the room chasing the bat, it reminded me so much of watching the Keystone Cops when I was a kid. LOL!

 

[AngelsBreath]

Now that is a great story lmao lmao lmao poor bat hahahaha

 

[daleron]

LOL BostLabs! I came all the way back here to see it you told the story & you did. City folks are funny ain't they

 

[StormFinch]

My parents had friends that found an orphaned baby skunk, which they promptly took home and bottle fed. They always thought it was soooo cute when that tiny baby would stamp it's little feet and turn it's .... toward them with it's tail raised. Once it got close to adulthood though, they figured the scent glands were probably on their way to being active so they took it to the Vet to have it de-scented. Imagine their surprise when the Vet told them that even baby skunks can spray! It was sheer luck that their cute little baby skunk actually liked them and didn't stink up the whole house.

 

[BostLabs]

LOL BostLabs! I came all the way back here to see it you told the story & you did. City folks are funny ain't they

I'm glad you liked it. The really funny part is that it is 100% true. Can't make this stuff up.

 

[daleron]

I just have this mental image in my head of the big buff marine dancin' around waving their hands in the air screaming like little girls

 

[BostLabs]

I just have this mental image in my head of the big buff marine dancin' around waving their hands in the air screaming like little girls

That is probably my most favorite memory of my time in the Corps.


Bat goes zoom... Marines charge behind it.
Bat turns around. Goes zoom... Marines charge behind it.

I was 28 then (and a bit wiser I'd like to think), the other guys probably 20-21. Not sure on the bats age.

And now the rest of the story...

As we were heading back inside the barracks, the Corporal asked me what I was going to tell the others in the squad bay about what happened. As I know which side of my bread is buttered I said "Why nothing Corporal. Because absolutely nothing unusual happened tonight." And I smacked my room mate on the chest and said "Right?". He was/is a bit slow but he caught on after a second or two.

This would come back on me a few weeks later where I had a goof up and that Corporal was on duty. I won't mention what it was, needless to say it was stupid (a lapse in judgement involving alcohol ). He looked me in the eye, nodded and said "Absolutely nothing happened here." and walked off.

Sometimes staying mum has benefits. And God does have a sense of humor. (Back on Topic! )

 

[AngelsBreath]

My parents had friends that found an orphaned baby skunk, which they promptly took home and bottle fed. They always thought it was soooo cute when that tiny baby would stamp it's little feet and turn it's .... toward them with it's tail raised. Once it got close to adulthood though, they figured the scent glands were probably on their way to being active so they took it to the Vet to have it de-scented. Imagine their surprise when the Vet told them that even baby skunks can spray! It was sheer luck that their cute little baby skunk actually liked them and didn't stink up the whole house.

lmao, good thing they didn't find out the hard way isn't it!!!

 

[BostLabs]

lmao, good thing they didn't find out the hard way isn't it!!!

Give a critter a nice home and they won't stink it up. LOL! (Remembers all the messes he has had to clean up over the years from many dogs and cats)
Well...

 

[cookiebun]

last year i was driving home from work and i saw a skunk lying smooshed on an overpass. as i went by, i saw movement, so i slowed down. sure enough, there were four little baby skunks hovering around their dead mommy. i wanted so bad to stop and scoop them up and take them home. they were so adorable. but then i thought, what if they spray in my car? omg, i would never get that smell out. so even tho it broke my heart, i had to let nature take its course and leave the poor things to fend for themselves. it still bothers me to this day tho.

You probably would have been fine. They can't spray very badly until they get pretty big.
Here's a skunk I rescued last year.

I took him to the local wildlife center and he was successfully raised and released.
We let a possum live on our patio one winter as well. We fed it pizza, yogurt and bagels
I can't find any of his pictures. .

I love skunks and possums.

Edit: Here's the Possum :

 

[AngelsBreath]

You probably would have been fine. They can't spray very badly until they get pretty big.
Here's a skunk I rescued last year.
View attachment 210168View attachment 210170View attachment 210171
I took him to the local wildlife center and he was successfully raised and released.
We let a possum live on our patio one winter as well. We fed it pizza, yogurt and bagels
I can't find any of his pictures. .

I love skunks and possums.

Well that's just cute as hell, thank you for sharing that.