I had quit, FINALLY, after 15 years of a pack or more a day smoking. What an accomplishment! Something i would be proud of for an entire year. The benefits I had seen were amazing! I could HIKE again, 3000ft elevation gain in 3 miles! Wow! Something i had not done since i was 13. Well, there I was... Camping with some friends.
I knew I should have brought my backups, I KNEW IT! All i had was two 18650's, my mini mech which took 1 and an RDA... It was only a matter of time before something went wrong. I did not bring the tools to rebuild the atomizer. I had no charger for my
batteries- and we would be here for a week. What the hell was I thinking?
The trip was a blast, we did a TON of fishing, nights were spent with our group of party-goers by the campfire. We drank ALOT and we shared our stories.. In the back of my mind, i knew... I was going to be without nicotine at some point in this trip. WHY, Why did i not come prepared. Something SO IMPORTANT to me and i did not bring what i needed.
Then it happened. I was on my second battery- three days into the trip. The vape was becoming very weak, I was almost done. I fought hard to conserve, only
vaping a puff or two every hour or so. I still needed SOME nicotine. It was about 8PM, time for another puff... Only.. Nothing. "OK" i said. "I can still do this, I dont need it". It had been an hour since my last puff and honestly, I did need it.
9 O'clock rolled around, we were hanging out around the fire drinking... everyone was smoking and I had nothing to occupy my hands. I was desperate. "I can go lay down, maybe if I go to sleep, wake up early and pack up- I can make it home and this will all be over". I laid down... Restless. The next thirty minutes felt like 10 hours, I did NEED it.
I will just go hang out some more, forget about it. I climbed out of the tent and rejoined the group around 10, seems like no one was tired. I knew i couldn't sleep. The alcohol was starting to loosen my grasp on priorities... Ok, just one drag, something to get me by. I looked at my buddy smoking and decided I would ask.. "hey man, let me hit your cig". Huge mistake! "Here, just have one" he said. Ok, what harm would a couple drags do? I lit the cig, inhaled deeply and noticed a few things.
The first drag was very weird. It tasted very bad, completely like chemicals. It was so satisfying though! I smoked that cigarette and enjoyed it, every moment. The campground we were at had a store that was open until 11, and guess what.. I needed nicotine. They sold cigs. The rest was history. I regretted that to this day. I had messed up, so bad. I had so much under my belt, so much accomplished- i was a loser that day.
Its been 5 years since then. My lungs have gotten so bad. I smoked 2 packs a day, marb 100's. I cough in my sleep and when i wake up. I vomit sometimes from how bad it is. Sometimes, i have a hard time breathing- something new and unfamiliar... I know why though. These past 6 months have been bad. It was time to make a change.
I proposed something to my wife; who does not smoke and never has. She loves sugar, if she could quit that... something i did 7 years ago... Then i would quit smoking. DEAL! She was onboard. Two weeks have passed, she has quit sweet creamer in her coffe, candy, chocolate, sweet tea, everything. She did it. Ok, My turn.
I went out tonight about 6 hours ago and bought a new vape. I have not smoked since i bought it! I can do this, I know I can! She is already proud of me, and I am too. Its time to quit once and for all, and I know i can do this... Here's to believing!
