Is there a polite way..

[Lilacs212too]

My sister in law was recently engaged (her great fiance took her on a cruise for her birthday and proposed there, aww!) and over the weekend she asked if I would be a bridesmaid. She also asked if my two daughters would be flower girls.

My sister in law is 21.. I am 30-something.. so I will be significantly older than all the other bridesmaids, not to mention I hate dresses. I honestly think her wedding would be so much nicer with me sitting in the audience and not participating. Oh and, her wedding colors are red and orange! the body type for the red and orange dresses she is considering are really great! If you're a cute, petite 21 year old who can pull off red and orange. I feel terrible trying to decline, and she won't really take no for an answer Aside from the aesthetic issues.. the two dresses for the girls will be a small fortune.. I can't see spending well over $500 on just dresses, not to mention shoes, hair, nails (the list goes on!).

How can I get out of this? I told her I would be willing to help her in any way with whatever she needed, but she doesn't have anyone else she wants in the wedding party.

Did I mention the red and orange colors? Any advice?

 

[Happy Domino38]

Wow...just wow...ummm, and she WON'T take no for an answer? Egads! Well, if it was me, I'd just tell her that you can't afford it and, if she INSISTS on having the girls participate, THEY'LL have to fork out the cash for their dresses, etc.

The idea of having to dip into their own pockets is a surprisingly effective method of changing set-in-concrete mind-sets sometimes.

Hope it works out for you girl!!

 

[Mary Kay]

Red and Orange? Is this child color blind? If it were me I would have to tell her no Thank you..we love you but NO, Nope, No way Jose, Not in this liferime, Never! Can't hubby help!
As for your daughters..I agree with Domino. Money talks or the kids don't walk!
Orange and Red? Oh good grief!

 

[Lilacs212too]

She saw a bouquet in a bridal magazine that was orange and red.. she thought it looked so great together! It's her wedding, so I won't say anything, but being a pale redhead, there couldn't be worse colors for me and my skin tone.

I don't care that the girls are in the wedding, I think they will love it.. getting dressed up like a princess, what little girl wouldn't!

I did try declining, I told her that her lineup would look so much nicer with her younger, skinnier friends (especially in those ghastly gowns!) and I would be willing to help with any and everything in any way she needed, but she doesn't have anyone else to ask that she hasn't asked already *sigh*.

Oh. I forgot to mention.. she is getting married next AUGUST, so on top of the whole orange and red thing, it is an outdoor wedding in what will likely be 100 degrees and crazy humid. I could cry thinking about it!

 

[keyzygirl]

I agree 1st with YUCKY!!Then with the $$ thing.Just say no,I cant afford it,I think it will work.I hate dresses too!

 

[Moonflame]

Quick, break an ankle, it won't be healed enough to walk in heels outside in August and you can get out of it gracefully. It'd probably be less painful than being in the wedding .

 

[Happy Domino38]

Wait a minute..you have until NEXT August?!? Great! Start making up fake fights between you and the hubby when you're around them. Then, next July, tell them you've SPLIT UP!!

Miraculously, you both came to your senses and you're back, stronger than ever, the VERY NEXT DAY after the wedding!!

What?

 

[Fudgey]

Orange and red ewwww!
My daughters favoite color is orange and black. I hope she gets over it before she gets married, but she is 21 so probably just wishful thinking.
You might just have to put your foot down and tell her you are just not a bridesmaid kinda of girl. If you tell her now she will have plenty of time to get over it.
Maybe a 24hr stomach virus?