Trying to persuade my husband to switch

[agga40s]

Have any of you found that your SO has resisted switching from analogs to e-cigs? My husband has COPD. When I bought my e-cig, I ordered one for him as well. The only time he'll use it is when we go out with non-smoking friends. He still has a couple of cartons of cigs, and teases me that as long as he has them, he's gonna smoke them. I have a feeling when he runs out, he'll just go buy some more.

This drives me nuts, even though I know you can't force anything on anybody. But since I know how much better I feel, I want the same for him, especially considering his COPD. Also, we have a "smoking room" in our house, and I'm dreaming of how it wouldn't smell or be nicotine-nasty if he'd join me.

I'm not hassling him, but I really want him to realize the benefits and join me. Anybody else been able to persuade your SO to switch?

 

[rejoice]

Still working on this with my husband. He argues with me and makes fun of me.
He saids,vaping is worst than cigarettes. He saids this just because he coughs trying to vape. He gets mad of the money spending on vaping stuff. I have a job and if I want to buy this stuff ,I will.

The bills are paid and all. I am hoping he will come around someday. He does not like change. His father died from smoking and he knows that smoking may kill him.
I too would like any help or advice.

 

[OutWest]

@rejoice - maybe suggest he inhale into mouth and then inhale into lungs? Sounds like he's direct inhaling.

I think part of it for both of 'em is that they see the ecig as too girly. I know that's how I felt when I saw my first ecig, which was the penstyle. Not that there's anything wrong with girly, but...

Perhaps, after theyve had a few cigarettes in the morning, ask them to try it for the day and to see how long they can use it witout breaking down and having an analog? If they go long enough with a good flavor, at the end of the day when they have an analog they'll realize they taste like a*$ and maybe, just maybe, the next day it'll be easier to get 'em to use it. If they agree, put their analogs way out of reach so that they have to make an effort to smoke 'em (opposite end of house, out in car, in garage, etc)

 

[SharonLM]

I have a little different situation, definitely heartbreaking. My DH supports my vaping and keeps saying, "I'm proud of you". I asked him when I first started vaping (one week ago today) if he'd like to try one. His answer, after looking at me for a bit was, "sweetheart, lets not waste them on me". Now this is a guy that's very positive about everything and when he said that my heart just sunk, you see, he has stage IV lung cancer. He continues to smoke, but our oncologist told him, "why not, it's too late now anyway and you might as well enjoy your cigarettes rather than go through the withdrawals".

 

[JustJulie]

I soooooo wish I could offer some help here, but my husband is a non-smoker and always has been.

I have to admit that I'm kind of surprised by the resistance of smoking spouses. I know that I had tried to quit smoking for years, and I think if I saw someone who was as addicted as I was making the transition so easily, I'd be jumping in with both feet.

It's not the same thing at all, but I've been surprised that my sister hasn't taken to vaping. I've given her a 901, a penstyle with a USB passthrough, and a Dura-C. She uses them, but I think she primarily does so in the office so she can get her nicotine without having to run outside. She says she's cut down on her tobacco use, but I'm not so sure.

To me, this is such a no-brainer, but I need to remind myself how much I hated and resented people when they'd gently (but persistently) tell me how I needed to quit.

 

[wv2win]

I have a little different situation, definitely heartbreaking. My DH supports my vaping and keeps saying, "I'm proud of you". I asked him when I first started vaping (one week ago today) if he'd like to try one. His answer, after looking at me for a bit was, "sweetheart, lets not waste them on me". Now this is a guy that's very positive about everything and when he said that my heart just sunk, you see, he has stage IV lung cancer. He continues to smoke, but our oncologist told him, "why not, it's too late now anyway and you might as well enjoy your cigarettes rather than go through the withdrawals".

I am sorry Sharon. I really don't know what to say, other than I will say a prayer for you and your DH and just do the best you can.

 

[JustJulie]

Oh, Sharon . . . that is heartbreaking. You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[OutWest]

So sorry to hear, Sharon. I know how tough that's gotta be. Well, not exactly, because I havent been through it with a spouse, but did go through it with my father and it's something I wouldnt wish on worst enemy All my best to the both of you and extra tight hugs for ya.

 

[Elendil]

I purchased my initial supply of ecig materials for both my wife and I. I was really expecting my wife to be resistant to the idea, or at the very least, I thought she would take a long time to fully make the switch from analogs to ecigs.

I was pleasantly surprised to see that she took to it right away and in fact, she only had one more analog after the day we started..........

I took the tactic that "These are ecigs, I am going to try them. I got one for you to if you want to give them a try" That's all I had to do and we were off to the races......

Here is some advice from a guy's perspective. Men have this weird bone in their head that makes them resistant to an idea that they haven't thought of in the first place. I do not know why this is, it just is. My wife has come up with some perfectly brilliant suggestions over our 23 years of marriage and I was resistant to a number of them, until I thought about why I was resisting them.......If I was being honest, sometimes it was because I didn't think of it first.

I am proud to say I have gotten better with this behavior, but it does occasionally rear its ugly head. The best advice I can give is to just let it lie. Your husband is bound to see the benefits in his own time and will come around(when he thinks its his idea)....

Good Luck!!

 

[Dilutetrips]

I can not get my wife to try and vap. I belive she will but for now she smokes and I vap.

 

[LaceyUnderall]

Well... one thing that we all do have to remember is that unfortunately, eSmoking is not for everyone. While all of us feel wonderful and want to share our experiences and it is really hard when SO's don't follow suit... it may simply not work for them. BUT... if they can exchange just one smoke a day for an ecig, that's worth it.

In our household, I smoke my ecig exclusively and my husband is on his about 80% of the time. Why? Because it is just too clean for him. He NEEDS the dirtiness of his tobacco. I am proud as heck of him though. He was a pack and a half a day smoker at least and has been smoking since he was 11!

To Sharon and Agga - Stay tough ladies...

 

[mamacat]

Sharon, my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your DH! Hang in there...big hugs to you.

 

[agga40s]

Sharon, I'm so very sorry. Your story brings tears to my eyes. My husband had invasive bladder cancer, and bladder cancer metastasizes (sp?) to the lungs frequently. You and your family will be in my prayers.

Rejoice, my husband also has big problems with change, and his dad also died from smoking. And Elendil, thanks for the insight into a man's brain - you do realize y'all don't make sense sometimes, don't you? Just kidding!

OutWest, I couldn't agree more.

I guess for now I'll just leave it on his desk (always with fully-charged battery) and hope he'll pick it up on his own accord.

 

[Elendil]

you do realize y'all don't make sense sometimes, don't you?

So my wife tells me..............

 

[SharonLM]

Thanks ya'll, DH and I have a solid foundation with the good Lord and we stay mostly positive, but we haven't seen the worst yet. Will probably need ALL the prayers we can get for strength.

Back to the subject, a lot of times when I want DH to try something and it is something that a LOT of men are doing, I'll start showing him what the guys are doing. For example Steve's Prodigy, Trog's SD, and so on. Then I'll start quoting some of the guys. Pretty soon he's comfortable with the fact that even though I found it, doesn't mean it's a girly thing.

DH is so used to me finding things on the net now that he's pretty open to most ideas. If he's not open to something, he normally never minds if I am, within reason of course,

 

[Jules22871]

I was a 2+ pack a day smoker for over 30 years who recently developed some kind of heart problem. My best friend found the ecig online and this forum and showed it to me. I really wasn't that into the idea at first but after talking to both my doctor and cardiologist decided it was worth a try. I ordered mine and was instantly hooked! My hubby tried it and so did my son. They couldnt wait for them to get here. My son is doing great, has maybe one or two analogs a day. My hubby is doing good but still smokes about a half a pack a day but I think he will eventually get there. We have since gotten my sister-in-law and my husband's cousin on them too. We are still trying to get my other sister-in-law on board but she is fighting it pretty hard.

I have to add that this forum has really helped me learn a lot about ecigs and juices. Just want to say thanks to everyone that contributes.

 

[gnsmith]

I can not get my wife to try and vap. I belive she will but for now she smokes and I vap.

I'm trying to get my wife to switch
So until then, she smokes and I vap.



Sharon, my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your DH!

 

[katink]

So sorry for you and your husband Sharon...

As for spouses, family, friends resisting well-meant pressure on them to also vape: remember how you felt when others were pressuring you to stop smoking? It only happened when YOU found a way that worked for you... without feeling you were giving in to those pressures, probably.
I know of myself, that I would have tried much more and much earlier to stop smoking, if the people around me would have stopped pressuring me... because of that pressure I didn't and wouldn't stop smoking... only after I had gotten them to shut up for at least half a year I could find room for myself to look around me, of my OWN accord, to try and find something to help me to handle the tobacco-scourge.

Have patience, let him or her free. Just casualy tell now and then (teasingly perhaps, but all in good humour) that you really are enjoying your banana; or your coffee-vape; or act surprised when you get in a new taste about how nice that taste is... get them curious, but never with pressure behind it.

What also can work well: ask help for something technical about your e-cig... 'invite' them to make something better in/on your cig. To 'mod' something about it however small... technical interest could well lead to wanting to know more about the rest of it too.

But leave the pressure behind... no nannying of your spouse, friend, family-member!

 

[NY JETS]

But leave the pressure behind... no nannying of your spouse, friend, family-member!

From what I've seen, when you are around someone a good amount and they start seeing your newfound energy, vigor, and in regard to SO's, that special something else , there is no need to push ecigs upon anybody. The real revelation is when the notice the absence of withdrawal symptoms they are expecting you to go through.

 

[RazorNribbonz]

My hubby has wanted us both to quit for a long time.. I told him I'd quit on two conditions..One- he wear a patch ( cause last time he was too macho to not go cold turkey= he was a beast! lol) And two, since I smoked lights but waaaay more of them, I had the hand to mouth habit more then the nic..So, I'd quit If I could do it with an e-cig ( or several :: lil laugh:
He agreed...And I figure once the analogs are completely out of our house..He'll automatically be more receptive if hes jerking for one....The key to doing any of this is to do it subtly, nonchalantly, slowly educate..Because as a few have stated..Nothing will turn them off faster then feeling pressure... Here are some of my ideas..

As of now he has no interest..So I talk to him a lot about e-cigs. stressing the manlier types of mods - the SD or the LV.. But, I think with guys and ladies...If you can get them to read this forum..That's going to go a long way..I'm going to accomplish this with my hubby by playing helpless and asking him to pretty please read the mod forum and make me a home made passthru ( battin eyes) lol...I've already gotten him to make me a dohicky that pushes my 401 cart down with one push, no more paperclip... I always get him to taste my vape ( complaining that I cant taste it = bad taste buds)..This will let me know eventually what flavors will work for him...

As for convincing a lady to vape..This should be a little easier...Apply all the methods above..You need to know what her flavors/mg work for her, ask her to read a thread or two to give you her/his opinion( pick a great thread).... And most ladies looove little pretty kits/presents...Get her a sexy e-cig... Pick a cute little tool box, jewelry box, something that is big enough...Load it with all kinds of e- stuff including cute little bottles, little bottle of hand sanitizer..little bottle of vodka for mixing etc...There's also a thread around here with a set of nail polish's plus stencils to bling her e-cig to match an outfit etc...

This also would work for a guy - cool toolbox full of MANLY stuff lol.... Present it like you're way proud of yourself and love em that much to go through all that..Ask them to please give it a try for one or two weeks with you- it's something you can do together or tell them you made it for them just in case they may want to try it one day, whatever feels like less pressure....
If they go for it.. One day a week sit down and do some DIY, make that day fun- If receptive at all they really need to at least watch spikeys comprehensive video or let you teach them..Whatever works better..Have a friend come over and rave how cool their e-cig is ( devious? yea..and? lol).You know your spouse better then anyone...Work it..:: two snaps and a circle:: lol

If they just don't like it or are not ready..You can still get all your stuff back...Seriously, I hope any of this stuff works for at least one of you..That would be great...Good luck to us all lol