What I mean by matched set is that the batteries are kept as close as possible in age, use, and charge level. This requires a level of monitoring that most will not follow and for a large part I do not either. It is better to have safe information to guide the method that you do chose to follow.
My understanding is that when you put two batteries in parallel the voltage difference tries to even out and the amperage that shoots between the two cells is extremely high due to the low internal resistance of the cells and this is what can lead to failure. The amperage levels can reach almost as high as you would get by shorting the cells.
The internal protection of the batteries may buffer this with good quality batteries but it's not something I prefer to completely trust. Best practice is the safest method. I personally recommend treating all cells as if they have no protection circuit because it can fail on you and the more you abuse them the more likely it is they will fail. I have been repairing electronic devices for almost 30 years and I can tell you that a lot of electronics will just fail for not good reason where others will keep going even though they have been abused well beyond their spec'ed tolerances.
I will say that I am by no means an expert on batteries and most of what I do know is from the internet and this forum so I could very well be wrong in some of my assumptions.